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How Video Games, Tinder, And A Samurai Sword Led To A Vicious Ambush

By Kristy Puchko | Miscellaneous | May 17, 2018 |

By Kristy Puchko | Miscellaneous | May 17, 2018 |

As she looked down at her sleeping boyfriend, 30-year-old Emily Javier had had enough. She’d later tell the police that she did this because her beau of two years had been playing video games too much (10-13 hours a day), and she suspected he was cheating on her. She’d found red hair in the shower, scratches on his back, and the Tinder dating app on his phone. So, she’d put a plan into action. With one hand she held her phone to light her attack. With the other, she raised the samurai sword she’d bought at a local mall.

Though the 29-year-old sustained damage to his feet, legs, torso, neck and head, and sustained three severed fingers that have been re-attached, Alex Lovell would survive this March 3rd attack. In interviews since, he’s taken great pride in that, detailing how his knowledge of martial arts and familiarity with fighting games saved his life. “The feeling I had when I won the fight with my bare hands is just absolutely the best feeling,” Lovell told the press. “I’ve played all the sports, won big games, landed some decent tricks on my snowboard. This was better.”

“I didn’t freeze. The Wing Chun came out,” he said, referencing a Chinese martial art form that Robert Downey Jr. has famously credited with helping him overcome his addictions. “I was able to stand on a knee that was just almost chopped in half and a foot that was hanging on by a thread.” Lovell then got close enough to Javier that he embraced her, and “I told her I loved her, and she was killing me. She needed to call police, or I was going to die.” He added, “She started crying, ran out the room, [called 911] and saved my life. So, yes, I instantly forgave her.”

He was rescued; she was arrested.

Lovell confirmed that video games have dominated his life, but denied cheating on Javier, noting, “I barely had time to hang out with my girlfriend, let alone another girl.” He admitted that playing video games all day killed his sex drive, which may have fueled Javier’s suspicions. However, Lovell says the red hair in the shower was probably from his dog, and that Javier had no reason to worry about the Tinder app on his phone. For one thing, he didn’t use it. And besides, “I’m not a model or 6’3’. Tall dudes slay Tinder. Everyone knows that.”

Though he faces a long road of recovery and physical therapy, Lovell is in good spirits, declaring, “I was just so proud for beating this samurai wannabe crazy lady with hate in her heart. I’ve been preparing my whole life for something like this.”

Javier has pled not guilty to first-degree attempted murder and is being held in the Clark County jail on $350,000 bail awaiting trial.

Sources: The Washington Post, Oregonian/Oregonian Live, Buzzfeed

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Kristy Puchko is the managing editor of Pajiba. You can follow her on Twitter.