Behold, The Goddamn Cutest Sexiest Hollywood Love Story You've Ever Heard
This week (every week?), it feels like we’ve reached peak internet, where actual outrage turns to kneejerk outrage and dogs and cats are living together in perfect mass hysterical all caps hatred. So if we can, just for a moment, let’s take a break from the weird things Jerry Seinfeld is saying and the exhaustion brought on by Game of Throne’s weekly sexual assault bingo tournaments, to hear the story of THE TRUEST HOLLYWOOD (BUT ALSO REALLY NEW ZEALAND AND ALSO NAMIBIA) ROMANCE TO EVER ROMANCE.
Just imagine, if you will, the best storyline of Love Actually.
Crossed with the mega action pants-igniting sexpocalypse that is Mad Max: Fury Road.
That, friends, is the story of Dane and Dayna. Dayna Grant has been a professional stunt actor for 20ish years, and has worked as Charlize Theron’s double multiple times. Dane fell into the profession more recently, and was serving as the double for Tom Hardy’s double on Fury Road in the Namibian desert when he met Dayna.
I saw Dayna straight away - she was the only girl from New Zealand and she stood out like a sore thumb… I saw her bag with her name on it and my opening line was literally, ‘Hi. I see you’re Dayna. I’m Dane’. That was about it.It was love at first sight of another kiwi! As Dayna puts it.
So the two of us were doing this - dare I say - very S&M-type fight, it’s a love/hate mixture between these characters. They’re very close, there’s chains, they’re holding each other in very intimate positions, and the longer we were doing it the more we’re kind of eyeing each other up.Sexy sex harnesses! Chains! Intimacy!
Dane describes their meeting as how the “stars aligned”
We’ve said it before and it’s quite cheesy, but it really was love at first sight. While we were punching each other we were falling for each other - quite rapidly.Just the story of two people, getting paid to chain themselves to each other and hang off the sides of giant war machines and do other acts Dayna describes as “hands down the most… you’re just happy to be alive, I guess,” finding LOOOOVVVVEEEE. That’s the REAL Valhalla.
Is that not the cutest/sexiest/violentiest story you’ve ever heard? Yes, it is. It is.
Via Stuff, with endless gratitude to Sarah J for the tip.