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This Man Has Some Firm But Vague Opinions on Soup

By Genevieve Burgess | Miscellaneous | June 22, 2016 |

By Genevieve Burgess | Miscellaneous | June 22, 2016 |

Big Brother on CBS at 8:00pm ET. Two hour, 18th season premiere.

Wayward Pines on Fox at 9:00pm ET.

American Gothic on CBS at 10:00pm ET. Series premiere. New drama about a wealthy family who finds out their dad might be a serial killer, as he’s on his death bed. Because TV rules are that you can’t be a serial killer if you’re poor, I guess. Anyway, might be a fine summer show, but does not look like a premise that will go the distance.

Any Given Wednesday with Bill Simmons on HBO at 10:00pm ET. Series premiere. I’ve been seeing promos for this in front of Game of Thrones for two months and so far, I have two thoughts on them: 1. Bill Simmons looks vaguely like a chinless version of some character actor who habitually plays dads or neighbors, but I can’t remember anything specific I’ve seen him in, he’s just THERE sometimes, so I can’t look up his name and it’s driving me nuts. 2. When he says “I think soup is the perfect food” he might as well follow it up with “and mall walking is the bee’s knees,” because that’s not an exciting hot take, that’s small talk at the nursing home. Also, “soup” is a category of food, not a discrete form of food, and there are many terrible soups and many good ones. It’s as meaningless as saying “I think sandwiches are the perfect food.” THERE ARE TOO MANY SANDWICHES TO MAKE THAT STATEMENT TRUE OR FALSE.

Royal Pains on USA at 10:00pm ET.

Genevieve Burgess is a Features Contributor for Pajiba. You can follow Genevieve Burgess on Twitter.

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