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Just Rename it 'American Horror Story: Dandy' And Be Done With It

By Genevieve Burgess | Miscellaneous | December 10, 2014 |

By Genevieve Burgess | Miscellaneous | December 10, 2014 |

Arrow on The CW at 8:00pm ET. Third season fall finale.

Black-ish on ABC at 9:31pm ET. First season fall finale.

American Horror Story on FX at 10:00pm ET. Tonight’s episode is called “Tupperware Party Massacre” so I guess anyone watching knows exactly what they’re getting into.

TLC Special: Holiday ER on TLC at 10:00pm ET. Totally could have been on this show that time I was 11 years old and launched myself off the basement stairs and straight into the ceiling overhang sometime between Christmas and New Years. I was trying to jump down the stairs, but hitting the ceiling was a fun surprise thanks to a recent growth spurt. By the way, if you really want to piss off an injured 11 year old, when you come to stitch her up after she’s been waiting 3 hours in the ER with a dish towel held to her head to staunch the bleeding and then had an open head wound scrubbed and shaved with no local anesthetic, pop through the curtain with a cheery “You know, this is my first time doing this!”

South Park on Comedy Central at 10:00pm ET. According to commercials, this is called “The Washington Redskins Go Fuck Yourself Holiday Special” but the listings site is calling it “#happyholograms” so I guess the episode will be somewhere in between the two of those things.

Genevieve Burgess had one of the best bitch-glares ever seen on a sixth grader that night.

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Genevieve Burgess is a Features Contributor for Pajiba. You can follow Genevieve Burgess on Twitter.