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5 Shows After Dark: These People Are Totally Not Glamorizing Combat. Obviously.

By Genevieve Burgess | Miscellaneous | August 13, 2012 |

By Genevieve Burgess | Miscellaneous | August 13, 2012 |

“Monday Night Football: Preseason: Dallas Cowboys at Oakland Raiders” on ESPN at 8:00pm ET.

“Stars Earn Stripes” on NBC at 8:00pm ET. Series premiere. This is that obnoxious reality series that’s been teased all through the Olympics in which some stars (Dean Cain, “The Biggest Loser” trainer Dolvett Quince, former WWE wrestler Eva Torres, Laila Ali, Nick Lachey, Picabo Street, Terry Crews, and Todd Palin) go through simulated military training , and which is already being protested by no less than nine Nobel Peace Laureates. NBC just keeps racking up the failures this year. I’m still holding onto a small amount of hope for “The New Normal” because maybe with three shows to manage, two of which are completely off the rails, Ryan Murphy’s tendency towards the crazy will be kept in check.

“The Closer” on TNT at 9:00pm ET. Series finale. And a final overly saccharine “Thank you!” will likely take us out on the trials and tribulations of Deputy Chief Brenda Leigh Johnson. The replacement series, “Major Crimes” will begin airing immediately afterwards featuring Mary McDonnell playing basically exactly the same role as Kyra Sedgwick just with a slightly different personality.

“Intervention” on A&E at 9:00pm ET. 13th season premiere.

“Mythbusters” on Discovery at 10:00pm ET. Obviously, we’re busting shark myths tonight. Though how there are any shark myths left to bust after the first couple “Shark Week” specials, I have no idea.

Genevieve Burgess is clinging desperately to the life raft that is “Shark Week” until the final summer television doldrums drive her mad.

Genevieve Burgess is a Features Contributor for Pajiba. You can follow Genevieve Burgess on Twitter.

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