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5 Shows After Dark: I Watch TV to Relax, Not Feel Sympathetic Shame and Embarrassment

By Genevieve Burgess | Miscellaneous | May 28, 2013 |

By Genevieve Burgess | Miscellaneous | May 28, 2013 |

“So You Think You Can Dance” on Fox at 8:00pm ET.

“Family S.O.S with Jo Frost” on TLC at 9:00pm ET. 90 minute series premiere. I don’t understand how people can watch these shows. They just make me so unspeakably uncomfortable with myself, the people on the television, the poor camera people and other production personnel, EVERYTHING. I also can’t understand how people would let that side of their lives be seen, but I have long since given up attempting to understand people who go on reality shows willingly.

“Girl Code” on MTV at 9:30pm ET.

“Body of Proof” on ABC at 10:00pm ET. Third season finale.

“Brooklyn DA” on CBS at 10:00pm ET. Series premiere. Alright, here’s a little experiment: I’m not going to google this series and I can’t remember seeing any commercials for it so I will predict the plot based on my knowledge of current and former law-enforcement procedurals. So, I predict this show will involve a DA that for some reason goes to crime scenes, helps collect evidence, participates in questioning subjects and takes cases to court. We will get no scenes of them prepping for court other than throw-away lines like “I’m getting ready for court!” every few episodes. They will have some personality ‘quirk’ that is played up as though it’s something that makes them a genius at their job, and we’ll get a healthy handful of New York jokes each episode. I’m about 70% sure the lead will be a woman, but not 100%. You can watch and report back on your findings, or sit back in the comfortable knowledge that whatever I’m wrong about probably isn’t worth your time to find out. After all, it is a procedural on CBS.

Genevieve Burgess does not need another run of the mill cop show in her life right now. Or ever, really,

Genevieve Burgess is a Features Contributor for Pajiba. You can follow Genevieve Burgess on Twitter.

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