Real Talk: Is Captain America a Virgin or Nah?
This, this right here, is the single most important issue facing the MCU today. I don’t care who’s going to play Captain Marvel or whether the MCU is going to fix its villain problem in time for Chiwetel Ejiofor in Doctor Strange or what Edgar Wright’s Ant-Man would have looked like. What I care about is whether Cap has at any point dipped his wick.
We’re looking at several possibilities here. But first, let’s hear from the experts:
I think so. I think they were soul mates. She was into him from when he was Skinny Steve, because she saw a kindred spirit in him, someone who had obstacles to overcome. And I think Peggy, as a woman in the male-dominated world at that time, was also kind of seen like that… so I think she resonated with him and felt less alone. So there was a genuine affection for them on a heart level and a respect level. Yeah, I think they must have done. It was a very traditional time, I don’t know! I’ll have to ask Chris.
Chris Evans! Christopher. Christobro. How ‘bout it. Does Cap still have his v-card?
It’s funny when you think about it - he’s probably a virgin. [Laughs.] He’s probably a virgin! I don’t know when it would’ve happened.
Well, he was on those USO tours in the first Captain America!
He was on tour. That’s true. Maybe one of those [dancing] girls blew his mind. [Laughs] He’s probably just a good guy. He was probably holding out for Peggy Carter and he’s a little more old-fashioned in that sense.
Let’s break this down. Some options:
1) Skinny Steve had sex before joining the army. At this point, he’s uncomfortable around women (witness his lack of game at his Stark Expo double date with Bucky) and not exactly a social butterfly. Plus, debilitating poverty and a neverending parade of illness aren’t optimal conditions for sexual romps. That said, given a birthdate of July 4, 1920, he was in his early 20s when he signed up, giving him a good couple of post-puberty years. It’s not outside the realm of possibility.
Bucky totally would have.
2) Skinny Steve had sex with Peggy Carter during training. There was definite mutual interest, but again, boot camp isn’t the best environment for a romance to develop.
3) Steve had sex with Peggy post-transformation, pre-Capsicle. Realistically speaking, if Cap has gotten funky at all, this is the most likely scenario. The attraction was there, they’d been through a lot together, and one assumes they spent a decent amount of time together following Cap’s relegation to poster boy status. Carter was down; I think this one all hinges on Cap’s ability to get his shit together and make a move.
4) Steve had sex with a random woman on the USO tour. You know those women—dancers and audience-members alike—were allllll over him. And it must have been heady, having that sort of attention after years of being a social nobody. The meaningless one night stand may not seem like Cap’s style, but, as Bucky never tires of saying, he’s a “punk” who doesn’t kowtow to authority—and, possibly, the sexual mores of the day—blindly. No matter what Tony Stark (or Ultron: “Language!”) may say, this guy ain’t your grandpa. I can’t see Cap promising to call before slipping out the fire escape while his partner’s sleeping, but at the same time, maybe one of those dancers wanted to have some no-strings-attached fun, and Steve is frustrated and anxious and has this new body, and… well, why not?
5) “When they were in Italy in WW2, Bucky totally got him wasted and took him to depressing brothel.” From Stephen Lloyd Wilson’s lips to God’s ears.
6) A post de-frosting de-virginizing. I’m skeptical about this one. He has to be smarting from the loss of Peggy—according to his timeline, they hadn’t been separated all that long, but he wakes up and bam, she’s old. Natasha tries to set Steve up on lots of dates, but it’s fairly clear that none of them take. He’s a bit picky about finding the “right woman,” which I think is a combination of him being old-fashioned and finding himself semi-adrift in a world where he’s more living legend than actual human being. You get the sense that he’s more into getting his life together than pursuing any romantic relationships. (At least until some Sharon Carter action happens, presumably.) Plus, there’s all that Avenging to do.
So. How ‘bout it. Steve Rogers: The 95-year-old virgin? Discuss.