By Brian Byrd | Marvel Movies | January 27, 2015 |
By Brian Byrd | Marvel Movies | January 27, 2015 |
The first teaser for Josh Trank’s Fantastic Four rebooquel dropped this morning and has taken the Internet by storm. Get it? Storm? As is, Johnny and Sue? Whatever you nerds think Big Bang Theory is hilarious. Go play with a pinless grenade.
Many of you marveled (GET IT AGAIN?!) at the trailer’s incredible scenes: a nerdy guy with glasses walking down a catwalk, Zoe Barnes filming a Beats by Dre commercial, and the black person who catches on fire without any assistance from hooded white men. But there’s more to this preview than initially meets the eye. Careful frame-by-frame examination reveals a slew of hidden treasures lurking just below the surface. Don’t believe us? Read on. Just be sure to unzip your skullpants first because your mind is about to get BLOWN!
The first unbelievable Easter egg arrives just two seconds into the trailer. This may look like an ordinary MPAA-mandated intro screen. But when you import this image into Photoshop and explore the color tables, it becomes clear that this green is an exact Pantone match to the skin of a certain “hulking” Avenger. You don’t have to be Bruce Banner to deduce that hero in question is none other than the Hulk himself. Yup: we already have definitive proof that Fantastic Four will tie into the larger Marvel Cinematic Universe. Amazing.
Up next is a swirling, CGI-heavy glimpse into the film’s time period. While the technology displayed later in the trailer points toward the story taking place in the present-day, the spotlighted scene here all but screams 20th century. It will be interesting to see how Trank uses this bygone era to his advantage. Perhaps later scenes provide additional context?
This. Movie. Features. Plants. Hmmmmm, what OTHER popular MCU property includes a plant-based guardian of the galaxy? Too subtle? OK: The Guardians of the Galaxy will definitely play a major role in Fantastic Four. Holy shit you guys how did all the other sites miss this news?
White people inspecting detailed maps at a table adorned with microphones. Obviously, Fantastic Four doubles as a first look at Serial’s second season. Is the military after Adnan? Does the Nisha call set into motion the events that transform our main characters into powerful heroes? And where the heck is Jay?
Wait! We already know this film takes place in the 20th century. So the mysterious phrase “this summer” must mean time travel is a major plot point in the film. Damn this film keeps getting more INSANE by the minute!
More evidence supporting the time travel theory. Here, an aging Johnny Storm stares forlornly into the distance contemplating his impending mortality. And yes, this is certainly a septuagenarian Human Torch. The only way comic tentpoles can cast more than one minority is if both actors play different versions of the same character.
The trailer also provides our first look at the foursome’s ultra-modern jet. “This is just an ordinary C-130,” say the same aviation “experts” who believe “planes” not advanced weapons invented and triggered by malevolent lizard people are what ultimately caused the destruction on 9/11. How can we confirm this winged monstrosity belongs to Reed and company? Count the props, brainiac. Ohhhhhhh, there are four. Whaddya know? Incredible what the world reveals when you if you’re willing to open your eyes.
Rather than simply announce the title and let the audience chew on these delicious mysteries, the trailer concludes with one last brain-crippling puzzle whose answer hints at even larger connections. Look carefully at the title card. Notice anything missing? The “A” in the word “Fantastic” has been replaced with the number “4.” What possible purpose could that have? Who could have taken their “A”?
Ho. Lee. Shit. The Fantastic Four are going to travel forward in time to May 2015, team with Sarah Koenig and the Guardians of the Galaxy, and reclaim their stolen “A” from the Avengers…unifying the Marvel Cinematic Universe in the process.
Told you to prepare your mind.