Thank merciful Baby Jesus, August is over. August is the worst. It’s that time of the year when everyone goes on vacation because everything else is hot and boring. So if you aren’t lucky enough to have the money or benefits to take a vacation, August is hot, boring, and a reminder that everyone else is on vacation.
Especially rough is the fact that late night goes on vacation, because at this point, it’s my main source of non-printed news (don’t head to the comments. It’s not my main source of news in general. I still read). So I’ve spent the last two weeks with very little idea of what Trump was doing. I followed the news about Hurricane Harvey, yesterday’s DACA repeal-ish, North Korea’s nuclear bomb testing, but I honestly hadn’t listened to a Trumpian word in fourteen full days. Until Seth returned to my life with a Closer Look about Trump’s response to the disasters in Texas, in Korea, and in the administration he’s created. Finally, I would get my daily dosage of information and snark from the man whom I most love to see rag on the President.
And I hated it.
Not that it wasn’t as funny or well researched as the Closer Look segments always are, but it was just too much Trump too suddenly. Trump pretending he is or could ever relate to an “Everyman,” Trump bumbling his one job of offering comfort to hurricane victims by making it another size contest, Trump trying to oversell his abilities by claiming everything will be back to normal immediately when it could take ten goddamn years, Trump just lying about almost everything. Like every other thing he said was some kind of exaggeration or blatant untruth. He’s so slimy and untrustworthy, in fact, for a split second I questioned if he actually has children.
So maybe we just don’t pay attention to him. The news, sure. It would be the ultimate privileged move to say “just don’t pay attention to politics.” But we could all agree to not physically watch Trump on television anymore. He seems to like the attention and it makes most of us physically ill, so maybe we just not? Shit, the Republican Senate Majority Leader has basically given the country full permission to ignore his boss. I say we take him up on that.
And in the meantime, we can just watch Gwendoline Christie instead. Talking about Tormund:
Or crying about Madonna:
Or literally at this point doing or saying or being anything that isn’t Trump. Seriously, just be near or around my eye- and ear- holes, Gwen. We need you.