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Ben Carson Is Partially Responsible For Rebuilding Areas Destroyed By Hurricanes. In Related News, We're All Partially Boned.

By Emily Cutler | Late Night TV | September 13, 2017 |

By Emily Cutler | Late Night TV | September 13, 2017 |


So let’s get this out of the way: Ben Carson is a neurosurgeon, which requires more than a little dedication, study, and practice. I’m not doubting his abilities in that specific field.

But you’ve gotta question his analytical skills, right? Like, maybe the dude who saw the hallway leading to a stage and thought, “I should hang here for a while,” probably isn’t the best to be making complex decisions affecting the housing situation of millions of people.

Including, as it turns out, hurricane victims.

So there’s a lot of stupid shit in there, but we need to talk about one of the big issues: poor people don’t want to be poor. So the whole idea of making public housing not “too nice” is fucking garbage. Let’s really break it down.

First and foremost, what do you mean by not “that nice”? I presume everyone is in favor of keeping all public housing up-to-code, yes? Because if not, there’s a giant fucking tragedy of a London apartment fire that would like to have a word with you about that. Also, probably pest free? Given the increased health costs associated with living in infested homes? And we can rule out the idea that anyone is arguing in favor of increasing violence? So that’s what we’re aiming for, right? Housing that is up-to-code, infestation free, and relatively free from violence?

Well, fuck, there are a shitton of people not in public housing who would give Carson’s left nut for that. So fuck off with your punitive-actions-disguised-as-motivation bullshit, Dr. Carson. We don’t need that shit. Poor people aren’t poor because they want to be. They aren’t unaware that being rich is better. They’re poor because we’ve got a broken fucking system that is not-so-slowly crushing middle- and lower-classes with increased costs of living and decreased wages for the benefit of the rich. That’s why they’re poor, dick weed. Not because their living conditions aren’t squalid enough.

Oh, and speaking of those rich people, how exactly do they stay motivated? They live in beautiful homes that are safe and well cared for. They’ve attained a level of material security most people won’t see in their entire lives. And yet they still wake up every morning to run their business and sell their luxury condos and run the fucking country into the ground. Why haven’t they stopped working? Oh, what’s that? They got rich because they’re motivated? Because working hard and being rewarded fairly for it is usually all the motivation an adult needs? Unless they’re poor that is?

Well fuck me. It’s almost like we’ve got two contradictory views on people’s work ethic explicitly designed to demonize poor people so we can continue treating them like shit. Good thing we’ve got a fucking brain surgeon in charge of fixing that.