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John Oliver Savages 'Revolting Human (Minion)' Stephen Miller and Trump's Border Policy

By Emily Cutler | Last Week Tonight | August 7, 2017 |

By Emily Cutler | Last Week Tonight | August 7, 2017 |

The breadth of last night’s episode of Last Week Tonight focused on Trump’s border policy (see the video above), and we’ll dig deeply into that below. But before that, we must acknowledge John Oliver’s savage takedown of Stephen Miller, “one of the most revolting humans I have ever seen.”

“You know, in a way, there is no more fitting spokesman for the Trump administration than an entitled, elitist asshole, who refuses to take responsibility for the messes he makes and that can somehow manage to pick a fight with a fucking statue.”

Meanwhile, I don’t want to take away from the importance of Last Week Tonight’s segment on Trump’s new border policy; I feel like Oliver might have gotten it basically covered. Instead I need to talk about the inclusion of lie detector tests during the U.S. Border Patrol’s hiring process. Specifically, “why?” and “don’t.”

See, John talks about how lie detector tests were administered late in the hiring process, and he seems to feel that’s a bad thing. Only the reason he thinks it’s a bad thing is because it was late. Instead of understanding that lie detection is inherently bullshit, and doesn’t have any place in any hiring process.

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In fact they’re such bullshit courts won’t allow their results admitted as evidence. Because lie detector tests are essentially stress tests, and hearing the sentence “Did you kill your wife and children?” might, for any number of reasons, cause your heart to race. And that’s if they’re even producing results not manipulated by the test taker. So not only can this magic test not really tell if you’re lying, it can’t even tell you the exact reason it might appear that you’re lying. Like I said, bullshit.

What’s more, it was never intended to be used as anything more than bullshit. It’s most often used as an intimidation technique by police hoping to secure a confession. And the more enterprising officers among us don’t even need to administer the actual test.

So while I’m not enthusiastic about cops lying and manipulating suspects, I get it. What I don’t get is why that kind of manipulation would be needed when you’re trying to give someone a job. You have a thing that they want. If they lie to you, you take it away. The manipulation is inherent to the relationship. There’s literally no reason to bring bullshit, pseudoscience “tests” into this situation. They could easily handle this the same way they do White House Security clearance. You just make very clear that if they lie to you, they’ll lose their job, and possibly be prosecuted. Then you just let natural consequences happen, because who is stupid enough to lie on-


Oh right. Jesus, they’ve even fucked up lying. Assholes.

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