film / tv / politics / social media / lists / web / celeb / pajiba love / misc / about / cbr
film / tv / politics / web / celeb


Confessions of a Pink Panter

By The Pajiba Staff | DVD Releases | June 23, 2009 |

By The Pajiba Staff | DVD Releases | June 23, 2009 |

Pink Panther 2: Prisco did not appreciate the earfucking of Blake Edwards and Peter Sellers, writing, “I figured there wouldn’t be much in terms of plot. I really expected better than a haphazard amalgam of godawful sketch comedy scenes wedged together like week-old monkey bread. In the movie, rich stuff gets stolen by a master thief called “The Tornado”: Stuff like the Magna Carta, the Shroud of Turin, an Imperial Sword, and the Pink Panther diamond. An international dream team is assembled to recover the artifacts. Clouseau’s an idiot, they hate him, the case gets solved. Yet, this doesn’t even take up the full 87-minute film. Instead, they have to add a bone-snappingly gawky love triangle involving Clouseau, his secretary/assistant Nicole, and an Italian detective.”

Confessions of a Shopaholic: Dustin has absolutely no memory of the movie, but according to the archives, he reviewed it, writing, “There is little redeeming about the film. It’s bright colors and a shotgun blast to the head. It’s dull. It’s long. It’s painfully out of sync with the current economic climate. There are only three genuine seconds in the entire film, and that comes in a small line delivered by John Goodman, who can shit 64 pound turds more appealing than Shopaholic. Although, miraculously — and as bad as Shopaholic is — Isla Fisher somehow comes out of it unscathed. She’s frothy and likable and truly a great comedic talent, if only she’d had the right material. She has a more pleasant, brighter presence than all of the rainbows that Katherine Heigl aspires to murder. She’s the only thing in Shopaholic that kept me from folding myself backwards in my theater seat until my neck broke.”

Inkheart: Prisco’s experience with Inkheart was summed up thusly: “As I was leaving Inkheart on Saturday, trying to formulate an opinion on what I just witnessed, a mother asked her son of about eight, “Did you like it?” He kind of shrugged his shoulders. She said, “So-so?” He looked at her and said, “Meh.” From the mouths of babes, my friends, comes truth.”

Waltz with Bashir: Dan very eloquently recommends Waltz, writing: “By making an animated documentary, writer-producer-director Ari Folman has created a story that speaks to the emotions of those involved with more power and grace than any filmed conversation ever could. Waltz With Bashir at once embraces fact and fiction while also blending them, transcending easy labels in its effort to round up the entire story, whether its Folman’s or a friend’s memory of lost youth or an impressionistic rendering of the pain, joy, and boredom visited on men at war. The film is a documentary, but its interviewees and their stories are animated; the men and women are real, except for the two whose faces and voices have been fictionalized and dubbed at their own insistence, rising from the discomfort of talking on film about things they thought they’d buried; the events portrayed actually took place, though Folman is the first to admit, especially after talking with a doctor and psychiatrist, that one of his most powerful memories of war may be nothing more than an invention of his own tired mind. Everything about the film exists in dualities, and Folman is smart enough to know that only in those tensions between real and remembered, between guilt and ignorance, can you find some path to redemption. “

Burn Notice Review | The Pacific Trailer

Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.