Yesterday I realized that the garbageness of our current timeline would be somewhat mitigated if I knew for a fact that Colin Farrell was all mine in an alternate timeline. Just knowing the Other Me is getting that curved Farrell wang, that accent, and that beautiful face all to myself would help me to power through. Why? I don’t know exactly.

WAIT I REMEMBER NOW. HNNNNG.

I also think if I were less of a mess in another timeline, that would help me feel better about being something of a mess in this timeline. Ying and yang, people. You have to have one to have the other. I would feel like I was balancing the universe or something.

So what do you hope Alternate Timeline You is up to?

Previous Article

The 'It's Always Sunny' Cast Stretch Their Talents by Playing Other Unlikable People

Next Article

               

What The F*ck Is Going On In This 'Legion' Season 2 Footage?

Jodi Smith is a Senior Reporter, Film & Television at Pajiba. You can email her or follow her on Twitter.

We Keep Saying It And It's Always True: Why Pratt Continues To Be The Worst Chris

'Borat Subsequent Moviefilm' Review: Wowee Wow Wow Wow (Plus Two More Wows for Rudy Giuliani)