I self-indentify as a geek. I may be actually be a nerd as I’ve never been quite certain of the distinction, but I’m pretty sure being a nerd involves math. Math and Prolixity are, like, un-mixy things. Experience tells me that at least one of you will provide clarification and/or a helpful link in the comments to clear the matter up.

The fact is I am not now, nor have I ever been, “cool” and I possess a reasonable depth of popular culture knowledge, as well three Opus toys I can’t part with and a profound love of Kermit the Frog. I didn’t always realise I was geek. I’ve always known I was uncool. High school has a way of sorting that out for you. I cared then, but now I’d rather be able to laugh inappropriately loudly and get disproportionately excited about things.

I became aware I was a geek when I decided to take a Learning Annex type night class in comedy improvisation. I found myself in a room full of slightly awkward, funny people who could quote WKRP in Cincinnati (which ran forever in Canada) and Monty Python. They were passionate about many of the sames things I was and I recognized that these were My People. When I told my best friend of my discovery, she said, “Yes, you always were kind of a geek.” I was taken aback, but how it had escaped my notice is beyond me. It was right in front me the whole time:

As part of my überWASP upbringing, I went to horseback riding camp of the “Though There Is No Change in My Patrician Façade, I Can Assure You My Heart Is Breaking” variety. We rode twice a day, went swimming, and took daily Stable Management classes. I loved it. To keep things interesting, they had themed events, such as costumed ride. I created the following ensemble for myself and Phantom, the horse I was riding for the month:

1. White shirt
2. Vest
3. Low slung belt
4. Stick for a blaster (to shoot first!)
5. Sign for the horse that said “Millenium Phantom”

I was 15 years old. I felt like a hundred dollars.

Please tell us your ultimate geek/nerd story. Provide your bona fides, your geeka fides, if you will.

Comment diversion suggestions, KRP box sets, and wedgies can be sent here.

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