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Good Driving Music

By Tater Barley Banks | Comment Diversions | September 5, 2010 |

By Tater Barley Banks | Comment Diversions | September 5, 2010 |

First of all, I was surprised and amazed this week to get an actual fan letter. Me, little ol’ Tater? Has a fan?

I can’t believe it either.

Believe me, I’m not doing this for the glory or the adulation of the sweaty uncouth masses. I do it for the money, the big bucks I don’t want to name names but his initials are Rowles promised me, and his tab is up to about $100 large now and getting bigger by the second, what with the 4000% annual interest compounded daily and all, and I have yet to see a penny of it. I hope I don’t have to send the Mountaineer to his house to hold him at musketpoint until he pays up, but you do what you gotta do.

Anyway, I got a fan letter, a delightful one, and while I’m too modest to reproduce any of it here (it really was a terrific letter, I’m being serious about that), I do want to thank Adrian in front of y’all for sending it and tell y’all again what swell and upstanding people you are …


Except for that guy who owes me money, he’s a con man and a shyster and I’m gonna make him squeal like a ….


OK … I’m OK …

Ahem … I like getting fan letters just as much as I like getting letters like this:

Hi there,

So, I love the Comment Diversions, especially the music-related ones. They’ve expanded my iTunes library tenfold. The Pajibans kick ass when it comes to music recommendations.

Here’s the deal: I have a hell of a commute to work in the mornings: bus, train, and carpool - which takes about an hour and a half, if I’m lucky. I leave the house at 6:30 am. The trip is made infinitely less tedious by good music on the iPod, especially if it’s cheery or fun or kickass, to elevate my mood and infuse me with a bit of energy to begin my day.

So…what do Pajibans listen to on the way to work?


Sabah, you made my day too, mainly cause now I can take the rest of it off instead of pounding my head for a diversion idea.

And it’s been awhile since we had a music diversion too, which makes it doubly delightful. However, I’m going to have to defer to the ‘Jibs on this one (the employed ones anyway, which may cut down the responses some), because if I miss all the lights I can be at the office in eight minutes, which is hardly time for the tubes in the radio in my 2003 Civic to get warmed up enough to listen to anything. It’s two or three songs tops on either the Classic Rock station or the College Alternative station, unless I slip one of them newfangled CD thingies in and listen to this bootleg Drive-By Truckers show again, like I did yesterday. In which case I might highly recommend their cover of Springsteen’s “State Trooper”:

New Jersey Turnpike ridin’ on a wet night
‘neath the refinery’s glow, out where
the great black rivers flow
License, registration, I ain’t got none
but I got a clear conscience
‘Bout the things that I done
Mister state trooper, please don’t stop me
Please don’t stop me, please don’t stop me

Maybe you got a kid, maybe you got a pretty wife
the only thing that I got’s
been both’rin’ me my whole life
Mister state trooper, please don’t stop me
Please don’t stop me, please don’t stop me

In the wee wee hours your mind gets hazy,
radio relay towers lead me to my baby
Radio’s jammed up with talk show stations
It’s just talk, talk, talk, talk,
till you lose your patience
Mister state trooper, please don’t stop me

Hey, somebody out there, listen to my last prayer
Hi, Ho, silver oh, deliver me from nowhere

That’s all I got.

So the rest of you help Sabah out, and provide some good speeding, road-raging, bird-flipping tunes for the daily trip to The Bad Place.

TATER BARLEY BANKS is not to be trusted. He probably makes up everything he writes about himself, especially the stuff about living in West Virginia. Don’t be fooled. In truth, he lives in Pajibaland, where he speaks gibberish as , (TCFKAB), spends his time sitting on a park bench, eyeing little girls with bad intent, and is developing a 25-letter alphabet, now that his key doesn’t work. He has no blog, no FaceBook page and no MySpace page, so don’t try to find him.

To suggest a diversion idea or leave Tater a fan letter, you can reach him by email.

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Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.