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When "It's The Thought That Counts" Seems Like a Big Damn Lie

By Courtney Enlow | Celebrity | October 12, 2010 |

By Courtney Enlow | Celebrity | October 12, 2010 |

Because when I think “People Who Can Stop the Bullying of Gay Teens” I think orange skanks whose catchphrase is “No homo.”

The wonderful slew of new websites aimed at speaking out against bullying really makes me happy. I hate the fact that it took the deaths of children to make people start talking, but I’m very pleased that stars are addressing this important issue, especially stars admired by those who might be at risk.

This does not include Snooki and J-Woww.

Much like “Well, at least they’re reading” doesn’t work for me anymore, neither does, “Well, at least they’re helping.”

Two pretend Italians (neither of them are Italian, and as an Italian girl, let me say thank Christ for that) who routinely beat people senseless and refer to fat chicks as “grenades” despite the fact that the Snooki one is, well, not un-grenadely, should not be allowed anywhere near this movement. They are not helping. They know what it’s like to be discriminated against? I’m so sorry, but it’s probably because you’re awful people. Like that Mr. Show sketch where Odenkirk is kicked out of the band and he thinks it’s because he has one arm, but David keeps insisting it’s because he’s a shitty drummer who happens to have one arm, I’m sure people were rude to these two, but not in a discriminatory way. It was probably because they were shrill lame Oompah Loompahs.

Everyone should make an effort to fight bullying, but it starts with you. If you’re making ridiculous sums of money (and they are. They really are.) then it’s incredibly disingenuous.

Also, why the shit are there two ‘w’s at the end of “J-Woww”? I think one would suffice. Also, why is Snooki and why do they keep letting it happen?

By the way, I’m sorry for having two Snooki posts in as many weeks. But the last one lead to a lovely discussion about literature, so I have to assume this one will lead to the cure for cancer.

Also, yes, I realize I referenced that Mr. Show sketch on Twitter last night, too, in reference to Hoarders. It’s always topical.

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