Imagine trying to describe the human shit show that is Piers Morgan to someone who’s never heard of him. You might begin by saying he’s a British blowhard TV personality, who feels the need to stick his nose into every conversation, no matter how outside his lane. You might try to explain the time he lectured Susan Sarandon on proper boob exposure, or when he counseled a post-“Formation” Beyoncé on how to be a better Black woman, or one of the many many times he attempted to own feminism by slamming Kim Kardashian. Point is the guy is an asshat who masquerades as a liberal while promoting the most mealy-mouthed brand of mainstream regressivism.
So of course when this Celebrity Apprentice winner got into a discussion about his old pal Donald, he defended Trump while proclaiming his fellow liberals were getting hysterical. And in a deliciously satisfying and savage rejoinder, brilliant stand-up comedian Jim Jeffries told Morgan to “fuck off,” then eviscerated the posh blowhard’s petty rhetoric.
And things only got worse for Morgan when Harry Potter author JK Rowling retweeted the above video:
Yes, watching Piers Morgan being told to fuck off on live TV is *exactly* as satisfying as I'd always imagined. https://t.co/4FII8sYmIt— J.K. Rowling (@jk_rowling) February 11, 2017
Morgan hit back. But dude was punching above his weight class.
This is why I've never read a single word of Harry Potter. https://t.co/XUJBMs4KKm— Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) February 11, 2017
Because you had a premonition that one day the author would roar with laughter at seeing you called out for your bullshit on live TV? https://t.co/8rkKSqJTnG— J.K. Rowling (@jk_rowling) February 11, 2017
Everything I said was factual.— Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) February 11, 2017
If you think screaming 'FUCK OFF!!!' at me changes that, then you're mistaken. https://t.co/0U9fVoTjfc
(EW notes this is a reference to Morgan using “fabricated photos of British soldiers torturing an Iraqi prisoner,” which got him sacked from the Daily Mirror in 2004.)
The superior, dismissive arrogance of rabid Remain/Clinton supporters like @jk_rowling is, of course, precisely why both campaigns lost.— Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) February 11, 2017
The fact-free, amoral, bigotry-apologism of celebrity toady Piers Morgan is, of course, why it's so delicious to see him told to fuck off. https://t.co/4XNF4G0nlD— J.K. Rowling (@jk_rowling) February 11, 2017
.@piersmorgan If only you'd read Harry Potter, you'd know the downside of sucking up to the biggest bully in school is getting burned alive.— J.K. Rowling (@jk_rowling) February 11, 2017
Then more of our favorite celebs joined in the Piers pile-on, and it was a thing of beauty.
Whew! J.K. Rowling for the win, ladies and gentlemen. https://t.co/wil1qhGIka— Ava DuVernay (@ava) February 11, 2017
I didn't know I could love @jk_rowling more than I already did thanks to Hermione (& Harry too). But I've found in the last 3 weeks I could!— Chelsea Clinton (@ChelseaClinton) February 11, 2017
Sometimes there's a feud & it's very hard to pick sides.— Kumail Nanjiani (@kumailn) February 11, 2017
Then there's @jk_rowling vs Piers Morgan.
I once saw a massive, sentient pile of vomit give @piersmorgan life advice, because pity.— GAIL SIMONE (@GailSimone) February 11, 2017
Then, just for good measure, in came the gif brigade:
Pictured: Piers Morgan takes on JK Rowling. pic.twitter.com/VVqAAmzLgo— Tyger Huckabeatz (@TylerHuckabee) February 12, 2017
jk rowling vs piers morgan - today on twitter— k8 (@rolling_2) February 11, 2017