Thanks, Piers Morgan, for Teaching Us What Empowers Us, Personally, As Women

By Courtney Enlow | Celebrity | August 29, 2016 |

Piers Morgan has a long history of critiquing women and women’s fashion or lack thereof under the auspices of…feminism? Being helpful? Expressing deep concern that the entire clothing industry would go under if women start getting all naked-like? I don’t know. He’s awful, generally speaking.

But don’t worry, ladies. He finally found an expression of empowerment that is correct and acceptable.

So @aliciakeys wore no make-up to #VMAs.
100 times more 'empowering' than @KimKardashian @emrata's naked selfies. pic.twitter.com/0QYyqDE1Mg
— Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) August 29, 2016

I’d say, you know, Piersypoo, maybe you don’t *get* an opinion on what is or is not personally empowering for any wholly unique woman. But I guess that would make me pretty insufferable and uncompromising.

I asked myself. Only the most insufferably uncompromising feminists believe men can't express opinions on feminism. https://t.co/vI7fHrflsB
— Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) August 29, 2016

*slaps forehead* My bad! I’m sorry for my thoughts! I mean, the nice man is teaching me how to woman right. I should listen. I’m sorry.

So so sorry to be so rude. I mean, it’s not my place to determine for myself what empowers me. It’s his! Again, sorry. Just so sorry.

Because what would we do without mansplaining?

What would we do without men “just playing devil’s advocate” and considering both sides of what our tiny lady brains might consider wholly unequal matters?