As you may have heard by now, Gwyneth Paltrow is waging a personal war against Vanity Fair. If you haven’t, here’s the rundown:
Now, Goop’s gone on a full assault. She is reportedly out to “destroy Vanity Fair.” She’s apparently gotten Clooney to back out of the annual Hollywood issue but has been unsuccessful with Julia Roberts because in a bitch-off, Julia’s going to win every single time, that’s just science. And, now that she’s messing with their cover elite, you know Vanity Fair will not fuck around.
The thing is, if things are getting this ugly, there’s got to be more to it than just an affair. In Hollywood, that’s basically real-life-people’s version of a night having one too many drinks. It’s the most common form of Hollywood standardly bad behavior this side of cocaine. So, they know something she doesn’t want us to. And we’re going to find out. What do you think it is? I bet they have photos of her shopping at *gasp!* Target! *faints dead away*
Needless to say, shit will get uglier and uglier and we will be the ones reaping the benefits.
You all know I only like Gwyneth when she’s insufferable, so I love this. I hope it never ends. I hope someone gets slapped. SLAP SOMEONE, GWYNETH! PREFERABLY WHILE WEARING SEQUINS AND SHOULDER PADS!