Patricia Arquette (Boardwalk Empire, Boyhood) was among a group of actresses who participated in THR’s annual roundtable discussion, where the women talked about everything from their most challenging roles to the lack of interesting lead parts for women; from public reaction to Renee Zellweger’s appearance, to Jennifer Lawrence’s stolen nude photos. It’s interesting to get their unique slant on the view from Hollywood, and Arquette’s strong opinion about the way we treat our celebrities — and each other, as fellow human beings — really stood out.
On the hacking of Jennifer Lawrence and other actresses whose photos were stolen and put online:
“I feel really strongly that there’s nothing deviant about two lovers sharing sexual intimacy. That is normal. It’s been happening since the beginning of time. Through any different medium. We had paper. Before that, we met behind the bush. You know? What is deviant is when a community decides that they can break into your sexuality, steal that from you, insert themselves, observe your private sexuality. And what really disturbed me — I ended up in a lot of Twitter battles with people about it — is, I feel like we’re teaching our children social values. I had a lot of women write to me that [the hacked actresses] were stupid to take those pictures to begin with. Victim-blaming — we have a long history of that. And, of course, someone who has a long-term relationship — three months that [Lawrence was] away [from her boyfriend], they’re going to share their intimacy with their partner. That society thinks it’s OK [to hack the photos], that it’s their fault — that’s deviant. That’s what we’re teaching our kids, that if somebody messes up or does what they want in their private life, they’re stupid and you can, basically, communally molest them.”
On a paparazzo incident (her daughter was with Arquette):
“I had a big fight with one…He kept following us. And I said, ‘OK, leave us the f— alone.’ And he goes, ‘Nice, mom! Good job!’ I said, ‘I’m teaching my daughter. If a man is following you and you tell him to go away and he doesn’t, you turn around and say, ‘F— you!’ as loud as you can.’ Because there’s no difference. I don’t care if he has a camera.”
As a mother with a *sailor-mouth* (is that insulting to sailors?), I agree with what she’s saying here. If someone is being a complete asshole to a mother in front of her kids, and she says so, don’t try to shame her or imply she’s not a good mom. Yeah, sometimes we swear, but that doesn’t make us bad mothers.
On Boys Don’t Cry really getting to her:
“My sister is transgender. … As a sister, a sibling of a transgender person, it’s really scary when you’re growing up, especially in the world of the early ’80s. You’re going to get killed, people are going to beat you up. People are assholes out there; it’s a dangerous world. And also, will you be accepted? Will you find someone who loves you, who accepts you as you are? So when I saw that movie, it just was so important to me.”
The roundtable also included Amy Adams, Reese Witherspoon, Hilary Swank, Laura Dern, Julianne Moore, and Felicity Jones. When asked about what they thought of recent public reaction to Renee Zellweger’s appearance, Witherspoon didn’t hold back:
“It’s horrible. It’s cruel and rude and disrespectful, and I can go on and on and on. It bothers me immensely…I know this is so Pollyanna of me, but why — and it’s particularly women — why do they have to tear women down? And why do we have to tear other women down to build another woman up? It drives me crazy. Like, this one looks great without her makeup but that one doesn’t look good without her makeup, and it’s all just a judgment and assault that I don’t — look, men are prey to it as well. I just don’t think it’s with the same sort of ferocity.
The ladies all shared some great stories, so do read the full piece.