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Jason London Arrested, Poops Himself in Patrol Car Because God Loves Wednesday!

By Dustin Rowles | Celebrity | January 30, 2013 |

By Dustin Rowles | Celebrity | January 30, 2013 |

According to TMZ. Jason London — who is still acting, prolifically, in fact — was arrested in Arizona after an inebriated London sneezed on a man. London refused to apologize, and then, to compound his drunken stupidity, he hit the man he’d already attacked with his snot droplets on the face. From the looks of his mug shot, London then got the sh*t beat out of him, but when the paramedics were called in to treat him, he cursed and pushed at them (apparently, he did not sneeze on any of them, which is the real crime here. I mean, it’s flu season, people).

And then, in a delightful twist, and the culmination of his entire career, Jason London sh*t himself.

According to the police report, on the way to the station London said to the cops, “I’m rich and I’m a motherf***ing famous actor! F***ing look me up, b****.” And then after telling the cops their squad car smelled “like s***,” he allegedly leaned to the left and promptly pooped himself.

That rich, famous motherf*cker, whose most notable role in years was as a glorified extra in an episode of Scandal, crapped his damn pants LIKE A BOSS.

Naturally, London denied the entire story, tweeting (in reverse order):

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Ah, yes: The “they doctored my mug shot excuse.” Of course.

Thank you, Jason London, for shi*ting yourself. Your shame is our entertainment glory. Also, nice glasses, dude.

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Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.