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Gary Oldman Delivers Canned Apology for Dumb Things He Said

By Dustin Rowles | Celebrity | June 25, 2014 |

By Dustin Rowles | Celebrity | June 25, 2014 |

With Dawn of the Planet of the Apes opening on July 11th, Gary Oldman did what every actor in his position always does: He apologized. In this case, he apologized in an open letter to the Anti-Defamation League.

“I am deeply remorseful that comments I recently made in the Playboy Interview were offensive to many Jewish people. Upon reading my comments in print — I see how insensitive they may be, and how they may indeed contribute to the furtherance of a false stereotype. I hope you will know that this apology is heartfelt, genuine, and that I have an enormous personal affinity for the Jewish people in general, and those specifically in my life.”“

Good for you, Oldman. You buckled to pressure from the studio, and you allowed your publicists to write you a nice apology note. It takes a big man to use someone else’s empty words to salvage your public reputation, your career, and the box-office prospect of your blockbuster movie.

Honestly, it’s not like I don’t believe the guy, I just wish that for once a celebrity’s apology would sound as genuine and sincere as the offensive statements he made.

“Mel Gibson is in a town that’s run by Jews and he said the wrong thing because he’s actually bitten the hand that I guess has fed him, and doesn’t need to feed him anymore because he’s got enough dough,” Oldman said in his interview with Playboy. That sounds like something Oldman meant. However, I see “how they may indeed contribute to the furtherance of a false stereotype” is not something people say in reality.

The better, more genuine apology would be:

“I fucked up. I said something moronic. I still think there’s a lot of PC hypocrisy in Hollywood, but I used a terrible example to illustrate that. Yes, I said something stupid, but anyone that knows me understands that I’m always saying stupid things that I don’t really mean. Just look back at my record for saying dumb things. You know why I’ve gone through three wives? Because my mouth has shit for brains. I can’t help myself! Every once in a while I have a decent point to make, but the way I navigate myself toward that point leaves something to be desired. That’s why I’m an actor. I read lines other people give me. I should probably stick to that. Sorry for the stupid things I said. Please enjoy the page views I generated for your blog.


Gary Oldman”

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Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.