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Brody Jenner Is Every Dumb High School Acquaintance You Haven't Unfriended on Facebook Yet

By Courtney Enlow | Celebrity | September 26, 2016 |

By Courtney Enlow | Celebrity | September 26, 2016 |


“Why is everything these days about race? Why?” is the rally cry of garbage white people.

Brody Jenner, son of Caitlyn so this is largely unsurprising, decided what the world needs now is not love sweet love but white opinions on how black people can avoid getting themselves shot.

“This world is getting out of hand with the race issue. Maybe I say that because I’m not a racist. I see humans as equals.”

Look, Brody Jenner does not matter. He’s blip-adjacent. In a Kardashian-Jenner ranking system with Kim at the top, he’s somewhere below Khloe’s wax strip. His thoughts and opinions should not matter, but I’m going to assume his thoughts and opinions sound an awful lot like the thoughts and opinions we’ve all had to hear from family, colleagues, friends and acquaintances over the last year or so. Because open hatred is obvious, but this is the far more common and insidious strain that gives hate its audience. There is an uprising of white annoyance that will be our undoing.

And that white annoyance can be found most easily with its three word warning:

OK. Fellow white people. I am going to say this slowly for those of us who seem to be struggling: We. Do. Not. Get. To. Be. Annoyed. That. People. Are. Mad. About. Being. MURDERED.

Stop. STOP IT. Stop saying “all lives matter,” stop asking why everything is about race all of the sudden when “all of the sudden” only means you just started being forced to think about it for likely the first time ever, stop. Just stop.

Header image: Lauren Conrad talking about Brody Jenner much more succinctly than I. TEAM LC.