So About That 'Body Language Expert' Who Came for Brie Larson
Because the internet is dark and full of terrors, Brie Larson is still finding herself on the receiving end of right-wing nutjobs and psycho dudes after she made an entirely reasonable request for more diversity at press junkets. All she asked for was a tad more representation, but judging by the reactions she received, you’d think she ripped Mickey Mouse’s beating heart out of his chest and ushered forth the white genocide.
This time around, Larson found herself the target of “body language expert” Mandy O’Brien who openly admits on her own website that her profession isn’t even a real thing after promising to “teach people to be able to identify and see deception in body language.”
I get asked a lot about credentials. There is no ‘Body Language Degree’.
That is literally the extent O’Brien goes to quantify her work. But don’t worry, she makes sure to let you know she’s totally legit by including this clip, and this clip only, on her About page.
If your biggest endorsement is Milo, a pedophile-defending Nazi who somehow managed to be too awful for goddamn Breitbart, you have failed in your field of choice. Your qualifications are an expert of exactly nothing. In a right and just world, the only person listening to Mandy O’Brien is some poor drive-thru cashier who just wants her to pull up to the next window, for the love of God.
Unfortunately, people (term applied loosely) are listening to O’Brien, and to the surprise of no one, these human sh*t-burgers really latched on to her latest body language critique of Brie Larson during a recent press junket with Don Cheadle and Chris Hemsworth.
While O’Brien calls Cheadle and Hemsworth “relaxed,” Larson is accused of coming across as domineering by appearing “stiff” and “trying to be taller than these gentlemen.”
“She is really trying to dominate them,” O’Brien says when Larson sits up and tilts her head up. “I guess in her mind, domination equals acceptance … In reality, submission will get you a lot further in friendship circles than trying to dominate and boss everyone around.”
And when Larson proudly acknowledges doing her own stunts, she’s blasted as being “unprofessional” and immature. The video even bleeps out an expletive O’Brien uses to describe the actress, who is known for her fiercely feminist views.
Larson is also accused of flashing “bedroom eyes” at Hemsworth because, O’Brien says, she wants him to “validate” her by liking her and thinking she’s “pretty.” Later, the star is chided for her “slow blinking.”
You’ll probably be shocked to learn that O’Brien’s Twitter account is a right-wing slop bucket of dumb, so of course, her followers include a garbage stain who spammed the Larson video at Cheadle, Hemsworth, Marvel Studios, and for some reason, Tom Holland. Fortunately, Cheadle wasn’t having it.
😂😂🤣🤣 you should see my "body language" right now … https://t.co/cJtHRUMSSQ— Don Cheadle (@DonCheadle) May 1, 2019
🤣 this is some of the funniest stuff i've ever heard … brie was trying to keep her ponytail behind her because her hair stylist kept flying in and fixing it. she's actually being OVER accommodating … amazing … https://t.co/cJtHRUMSSQ— Don Cheadle (@DonCheadle) May 1, 2019
While it’s great that Cheadle slapped this horsesh*t down, the biggest and most delicious own came for the brain geniuses who predicted that Larson’s presence is “box office poison” going into the opening weekend of Avengers: Endgame. You know, because Captain Marvel tanked so hard, and clearly, the most insanely hyped movie in the world is going to bomb because some rando on the internet basically called Brie Larson a b*tch. These are very smart takes.
LoL you can just see the tension there. Neither of these men respect her at all..and she thinks she is above them. Well her career is over she is going to become box office posion.— Lisa (@Phoenix0317) April 25, 2019
Marvel is in a heap of trouble …— Jimmer Hardy (@JimmerHardy) April 24, 2019
Here’s the thing, not only did Endgame make the billions of dollars that even secluded tribes in the rainforest could’ve seen coming, but Captain Marvel — a movie that has been in theaters for almost two months — jumped back up to the #2 slot for the weekend. Whoops. So obviously, Brie Larson is not box-office poison, and I don’t know how a person becomes so detached from reality that they’d even try to make that case in the face of undeniable evidence. It’s staggering to me, but there’s also comfort in it because, thankfully, the world is passing these idiots by.
Enjoy obscurity, you hateful dongbags.
Header Image Source: Getty
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