There is no better celebrity gossip than the petty, vague, pull-it-from-the-comments-of-some-dumb-website kind of gossip and I’m here today to bring you just that. So, before I do, please take this all with a massive, massive grain of salt because, well, People.com isn’t going to run anything about this, so you know this is all probably bullshit, but it’s funny bullshit, so I want you to know about it.
See, there’s a blind item from BlindGossip.com going around that Joaquin Phoenix, who pulled a Lorax in his acceptance speech for Best Actor for
Space Camp Joker that we need to show respect for many things, including cows. I mean, fair dues, he’s not wrong. Respect is rarely a bad thing, and it is very much a good thing when Aretha Franklin sings about it.
However, some movie star took it upon themselves to mock Phoenix for his sincerity towards cows in an obviously, asshole-y, but also? Kind of funny way:
[Movie Star] just walked by him and said, “Mooooo.” Joaquin didn’t seem to think that was funny and just gave him a look.
You’ll note that Phoenix is a vocal vegan, so moo-ing at him takes on a whole new level of schoolyard bone-headedness, that if this is true (it’s probably not) it demonstrates that “Movie Star” put at least a half second’s worth of thought into his very, very stupid “burn.”
For whatever reason, the general consensus in the comments and various Tweets I’ve seen seems to be that this person is Brad Pitt, which now that he got his hardware for
Cool World …Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, I guess he can drop his campaign and go back to being an asshole, albeit a slightly funny one.
I mean, did this happen? Again, probably not. Is this the kind of low-level stupidity I like to see? Yes, absolutely because I enjoy assholes who are funny, and this is low-stakes low-harm bullshit. The moo is entirely juvenile, but you know what? Juvenile can be funny, that’s why Adam Sandler’s career has done so well but let’s be honest, he hasn’t made a funny movie since Happy Gilmore, but Happy Gilmore is enough.
Yes, I just laughed at the clip even though I’ve seen it a bajillion times, and yes, I laughed at the idea of some jackass movie star, possibly Brad Pitt, moo-ing at Joaquin Phoenix because Phoenix and possibly Pitt had just won the biggest awards in their field, and this is how one (Pitt) choses to celebrate it?!
Now excuse me, I have to go track down Billy Madison on streaming, I’m in the mood.
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