I need you to do me a favor before you start reading this, I need you to put on the following song, you know, to set the tone.
Robert Downey Jr bought Chris Evans a custom 1967 Camaro, which he had delivered to him on the set of Avengers: Infinity War. RDJ was heavily involved in the design process, and even went so far as to the have the Captain America logo adorned on the steering wheel because he knows Best Chris when he sees him. The other, lesser Chrises got nothing, proving they are the Gretchen Weiners of the Marvel Extended Universe.
The car will be showcased on Jay Leno’s Garage tonight, which is cool and all, but let’s get back to the important part of all of this: a classic muscle car with Best Chris in the driver’s seat. (Also, yes, I know that Slow Ride came out in 1976, but you cannot deny it’s the perfect song to listen to in any Camaro.)
Picture this, you’re cruising down the Pacific Coast Highway, a little bit of Foghat on the radio, with Chris Evans by your side. Can you seriously tell me with a straight face that scenario would be better with a Pratt or a Hemsworth in the driver’s seat?
Oh, so you think it would be better with Hemsworth? Guess what smarty pants? The interior of a 1967 Camaro only has 56.7 inches for your shoulders, and 56.3 inches for your hips. You think Hemsworth, who is 6’3 and extremely muscular is going to fit comfortably in a car made more than 50 years ago when the average man was 5’8 in America (where the car was built)? Hardly. If you were unlucky enough to be next to Hemsworth in this car, he’d spend the entire time complaining how uncomfortable he was, doesn’t sound much fun, does it? Evans, a cool 6 feet tall would fit much more comfortably in the car (even with his muscular frame) and would undoubtedly make for a much pleasant companion. You’d laugh a little, learn a little, and generally grow as people during the ride with Evans.
The Hemsworth lobby has upped their game lately, trying to convince us that Hemsworth is no longer a lesser Chris. Don’t be dissuaded by their repeated efforts. Robert Downey Jr anointed his favorite Chris through the extravagance of his gift, surely his sign of approval is enough to firmly plant Chris Evans back in the position of best Chris?
Header Image Source: Getty