10 of Box-Office History's Biggest F*ck Yous

By Dustin Rowles | Box Office Round-Ups | May 6, 2012 |

By Dustin Rowles | Box Office Round-Ups | May 6, 2012 |

The 40-Year-Old Virgin: An R-rated comedy starring an unproven cast at the time (Steve Carell, Paul Rudd, Seth Rogen) directed by the failure behind two quickly canceled series, “Freaks and Geeks,” and “Undeclared”? That’ll never work.

Fuck You: $109 million

The Blair Witch Project / Paranormal Activity: A grainy black-and-white horror movie with no marketing budget, no stars, and no professionals filmed for under $100,000. That’ll never work.

Fuck You: $140 million/ $107 million

Bridesmaids: An all-female ensemble starring two “SNL” cast members — and female cast members have never had succesful movie careers — and the overweight woman from “Gilmore Girls”? With Wilson Phillips? That’ll never work.

Fuck You: $169 million

The Matrix: An action film starring a washed-up, untalented actor who hadn’t had a hit in five years directed by the guys who directed Bound? And it’s opening in April? That’ll never work.

Fuck You: $171 million

Rise of the Planet of the Apes: A prequel to a series that no one really cared abou the last time someone tried to resurrect it starring a guy coming off a few duds who no one can stand because he bombed his Oscar hosting gig. Directed by who? That’ll never work.

Fuck You: $176 million

Mission: Impossible — Ghost Protocol: A long-dormant franchise given up for dead starring a washed-up crazy actor coming off a string of box-office disappointments and a public relations nightmare? That’ll never work.

Fuck You: $209 million

How to Train Your Dragon: A critically adored animation film that’s not from Pixar. About a dragon? Opening in March? Are you crazy! That’ll never work.

Fuck You: $217 million

Star Trek: A flailing, long-dormant franchise which had only ever had one $100 million movie, 23 years prior, starring two little known actors from a director mostly known for his television work. That’ll never work.

Fuck You: $257 million

Iron Man: A superhero film featuring an untested little known superhero starring a washed-up, forty-something former drug addict, directed by the guy who did Swingers, based on a barely existent script? Yeah, right. That’ll never work.

Fuck You: $318 million

The Avengers: A collection of second-tier superheroes from a comic-book brand that had been churning out mediocre efforts in a marketplace suffering from superhero fatigue directed by a guy with a series of low-rated mostly unsuccessful television series and only one feature film to his name, a $25 million grossing cult film. That’ll never work.

Fuck You: $200 million $207 million opening weekend, the biggest opening weekend in box office history by a whopping 20 percent. It also surpassed the box office tallies of The Incredible Hulk, Captain America, and Thor within THREE DAYS. That’s not even to mention the enthusiastic raves from critics and the seldom-seen A+ Cinemascore.