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Off With Their Heads! The Worst of Cannonball Read IV

By Mswas Sawsm | Books | December 31, 2012 |

By Mswas Sawsm | Books | December 31, 2012 |

Our Cannonballers want to warn you away from these books. They’re all 1 or 2 star reviews on the Cannonball Read IV group blog. It’s no surprise to see 50 Shades of Grey on here, but Deadlocked by Charlaine Harris also got a bunch of votes. Take heed, Charlaine! (For 5 star reviews, check out The Best of Cannonball Read IV.)

Sara Habein:
Oh man, EASILY EASILY EASILY it was Alison Wonderland by Helen Smith. It was awful.

The Concubine’s Gift by K. Ford K.
While the Savage Sleeps by Andrew Kaufman
No Rest for the Dead by various authors

The worst I read, by far, was Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children by Ransom Riggs.
The Future of Us by Jay Asher & Carolyn Mackler was pretty terrible as well.
The Ickiest book I read was Bonk by Mary Roach.
The biggest letdown was the Second Empress by Michelle Moran, because her Madame Tussaud book was fascinating, and I expected a book about Napoleon’s second wife to be far more interesting.

Spies of the Balkans by Alan Furst
An American Story by Ethan Russell

Gone by Michael Grant
The Cellar by Richard Layman
Eerie by Blake and Jordan Crouch

Wake by Lisa McMann.
The Hollow Chocolate Bunnies of the Apocalypse by Robert Rankin. I’m sure some people have this as a five star book, but it just didn’t work for me. It was my first review of the year, too. Not a great way to start.

Edenbrooke by Julianne Donaldson
I Only Have Eyes for You by Bella Andre
Deadlocked by Charlaine Harris
At Your Pleasure by Meredith Duran

Mrs. Smith:
I only gave 1 star to one book: Shame by Karen Alvtegen It was truly, truly awful.
I gave 2 stars to The Weird Sisters by Eleanor Brown I thought I was the only one, but I got lots of comments that I’m not alone on that one.

The worst book was definitely Ahab’s Wife by Sena Jeter Naslund. This is pretty subjective though because I know a LOT of people who love it.
The Devil in the White City by Erik Larson.

Look Again by Lisa Scottoline
The Magicians by Lev Grossman
50 Shades of Grey by E. L. James

A Discovery of Witches by Deborah Harkness
Uglies by Scott Westerfeld
The Chemical Garden Trilogy by Lauren DeStefano

The Flame Alphabet by Ben Marcus

El L Cool J:
Game of Thrones by George R. R. Martin
A Hologram for a King by Dave Eggers

Answer Me, Answer ME by Irene Bennett Brown

Goddess of Apathy:
Fifty Shades of Grey by E. L. James

Chime by Franny Billingsley, HANDS DOWN. It was so awful. Muddled, a weird dialect that is never explained, extremely underdeveloped characters whose motivations seem completely random, and a story that just makes no sense. In a nutshell: Terrible.
A close second is Lament by Maggie Stiefvater. At least comprehensible, it was an utterly predictable schlockfest, complete with instant love between the good girl and bad boy. Ugh.
And finally, Deadlocked by Charlaine Harris. Somebody just take that series behind the woodshed and shoot it.

The Fatling:
The Shooting Party by Isabel Colgate
America Pacifica by Anna North

Mrs. Julien:
To Challenge the Earl of Cravenswood by Bronwen Evans

The worst three books I’ve read are:
Fifty Shades of Grey by E. L. James
The Kissing Club by Julia Clarke
The Goddess Test by Aimee Carter

50 Shades of Grey by E. L. James

Deadlocked by Charlaine Harris
The Translation of the Bones by Francesca Key

If you’re looking for books to add to your "to read" list, head on over to the Best of Cannonball Read IV.

(You, too, can be just like these fine folk in 2013. Sign up for Cannonball Read V!)