We Have No Idea What to Think Of the Upcoming 'Heathers' TV Series

The Pajiba Staff | TV | January 18, 2018

Before you do anything, watch the trailer for Paramount TV’s Heathers TV series (Paramount TV used to be Spike TV, by the by. They’ve rebranded).

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If you’ve seen the original Heathers movie, well that was … confusing. They’ve reimagined the Heathers — the popular, blonde, bullying bitches as … a Heather who identifies as genderqueer and a Heather who describes herself as someone having the body of “Martha Dumptruck” (a callback to the original movie). I mean, that’s … interesting? But Veronica? The protagonist? She’s a pretty blonde, which again is … concerning.

We half hate it, and half want to watch it right now.

Is it anti-PC, or anti-anti PC? Because it feels like the kind of trailer that is begging for online writers to call it out only to find out that there’s a trap waiting around the corner designed to make fools of us all.

Or maybe there’s nothing anti-PC or anti-anti PC about it. High schools have evolved away from John Hughes stereotypes, and it’s not a stretch to imagine that kids who were once marginalized have since become the popular kids. It is more of a stretch to think that they are popular kids who are also bullies. Then again, kids still bully each other — and people with disabilities, and those who are overweight or poor are still significantly more likely to be bullied than other kids, while gay and trans kids are still bullied in droves. But then again, the reasons are significantly more blurry than they once were, which makes high school even more challenging today than ever.

But if high schools have gotten significantly less clique-y, then identities aren’t as rigid anymore either. So the quarterback might also be super into coding, and the Homecoming queen is on the badminton team and plays flute. How are they going to have the big, tough popular kid if schools don’t have popular kids anymore?

Is that what the show is trying to tackle? Like, the landscape has shifted so much that if you WERE to imagine a clique like Heathers, it wouldn’t be the usual types.

Maybe it’ll work. The original Heathers was over the top and unrealistic, after all.

Have we talked ourselves into liking this show?

Hmmm.

Ultimately, it’s gonna come down to execution. We’re impressed with the tightrope they’ve chosen to walk in the trailer (the unwise decision to tackle an 80’s teen classic notwithstanding), but we’re also ready to watch them break their fucking necks in the attempt.

So, uh, good luck with that, nu-Heathers.


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