TLC Is Here To Remind You That No Matter What You Do, There Will Always Be Someone More F***ed Up Than You
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TLC Is Here To Remind You That No Matter What You Do, There Will Always Be Someone More F***ed Up Than You

By Dustin Rowles | Videos | March 7, 2013 | Comments ()


You watch this TLC reality show, "Strange Addictions"? Yeah. Me neither. Life's too short. But hell if those half hour episodes don't make for strangely curious Internet posts. There's the Florida couple addiction to coffee enemas; The woman who eats her cat's hair; and last year, my Uproxx colleague catalogued the 10 Strangest Addictions, including the guy who eats glass, the woman who eats from her ashtray, and the woman who is addicted to bleach baths. BLEACH, people.

This week's perverse oddity comes 19-year-old Allison, who eats tires, which is totally not normal, y'all. She doesn't eat the entire things at once -- she's not a Looney Tunes character -- but she does eat shreds of them, and over the course of six years, she's eaten 50. 50 TIRES. Or about

"The rubber tire pieces taste really chemically, like a shock to your taste buds. It's amazing," she says. "The texture of the rubber pieces is like beef jerky. It's a work out for your jaw."

Her husband, naturally, works in a tire factory, so there's always rubber on the table.

This human interest story is brought to you by TLC. Here's a woman addicted to eating her dead husband's ashes.

You are so welcome!

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Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not

  • Lyndsay

    My psychologist brother in law, when he was doing therapy, had a patient who used to eat metal spoons. She had figured out a way to bend them in such a way that she could swallow them. She also ate batteries. It was a compulsion - she would call him in an emergency when she feared she really wanted to swallow a spoon, and he had to come up with a list of alternative activities for her to calm whatever anxiety or thing was compelling her to eat spoons. She had completely damaged her throat - she had the voice of a 70 year old Lindsay Lohan - and stomach from swallowing spoons, required surgery to remove them. He said that she had suffered severe, SEVERE abuse as a child, and these types of self-destructive compulsions usually do come from extreme child abuse. So when I see this show I think of the Spoon Lady (as I used to refer to her, because when I heard about it as a teenager it sounded so insane to me that it was hilarious) and what horrors the people on this show had to have experienced to come to this point.

  • Uriah_Creep

    Her husband, naturally, works in a tire factory, so there’s always rubber on the table.

    Now there's a sentence I never thought I'd read anywhere, much less on Pajiba.

  • Long_Pig_Tailor

    When she's dieting, does she eat balloons? They're light and airy, but still rather filling.

    You know, I would imagine.

  • I always enjoy Dustin's random "WTF?" posts.

  • dizzylucy

    What kind of wine goes with tires - white or red? Or motor oil?

  • Yocean

    Coming soon to your theaters; based on a Nicholas Sparks novel based on a true story "You Are Who You Eat."

  • yocean

    Alternately: "Ash Everyday"

  • ZombieNurse

    How do these people not die? I want to know how eating tire shreds and human effing creamains doesn't do terrible things to their bodies!

  • PerpetualIntern

    Not to mention glass!

  • naye in VA

    Nobody else laughed at the "workout for your jaw" line?

  • Puddin

    To all the single people out there--this chick has a boyfriend. And you don't. Chew on that tire for a bit.

  • pumpkin

    And he brings her tires! To eat!!!

  • Long_Pig_Tailor

    That's... love?

  • Mrcreosote

    If you ever get a chance look up the history of TLC. It started as a publicly funded channel and had exciting shows on boating safety and geology. Then it was privatized, and for about a decade it continued along. In the early 90s it was retooled to make more money, which lead it downhill faster than imaginable. Now it's all tire eating, American Gypsy Wives and Honey Boo Boo. Remember that the next time some blowhard rep wants to cut the miniscule funding for PBS. Within a few years Seasame Street will be about a nightclub in the meat packing district and NOVA will cover nothing but what stars are best for astrology readings. Can't we have just a few channels that don't pander to the stupid? Please? No? I guess there are just too many stupid.

  • Salieri2

    I agree with you in principle and generally, but Sesame Street's probably going to be fine if Sesame Workshop forgoes government grants:

    "In all, Sesame Workshop raised almost $34 million in private funds for Sesame Street, aside from government grants.

    In addition, Sesame Workshop brought in almost $30 million in revenue from content distribution and media production. In total, Sesame Workshop brought in over $122 million in revenue, not including government grants. On their website, Sesame Workshop claims corporate, foundation, and government support make up 35% of their budget. Realistically, however, government funding only accounts for just over 6% of their budget."

  • PaddyDog

    This. This. This. This.

  • Kballs

    Lernding is fer cissies and commies!

  • Kballs

    I want them to follow the dead-husband's-ashes lady as the urn slowly empties. Will she be okay when it's all gone? If not, will a stranger's ashes do the trick? Or does she need an emotional attachment to fully satisfy her craving? If I were in her family, I'd be watching the ash-level like a hawk and wondering if she was sizing me up for a refill.

  • apsutter

    Oh man...that episode was so freaking sad. She was completely heartbroken over losing him when he died and sadder still because almost all of his ashes were gone. I think she got some pretty serious counseling to help her deal with his death.

  • UnderTheDark

    There's actually a short story out there about this EXACT THING, by Clive Barker maybe? Although, in that story, the woman incorporates the ashes into her <ahem> encounters with new lovers and ingests them that way.

  • Lyndsay

    Makes me think of the Six Feet Under episode where a group of kids decided to snort their friend's ashes.

  • I have read that story, damned if I remember where. It was all I could think about when I saw that lady's story.

  • PaddyDog

    Maybe she'll marry again, to a terminally ill guy. Gotta keep the supply chain going.

  • BWeaves

    Sadly, I thought the same thing.

  • lowercase_ryan

    god fucking damnit

  • Long_Pig_Tailor

    I don't understand why you don't have more upvotes. This is truly the best response.

  • TheOneWithoutTvEyes

    Kill your TV now ... just do it. *sigh* ~humanity will be the down fall of us all. Eating tires, a person's ashes ... thanks Pajiba! I needed to know about this!

  • Puddin

    I'm not killing my tv until Breaking Bad ends.

  • ishopgirl

    What happened to TLC?? A few years ago I would tune in to LEARN hence the name. Yet, now they have filled it with the most vile crap they can possibly dredge up... No wonder there are soooo many screwed up people when TLC's mission statement is to be the glamorized quitessential go-to for as much tire-eating as you can stomach. sick.

  • I wonder how I can DELETE TLC from my cable lineup. Now that
    What Not To Wear is ending, I have no use for this "channel" at all.

  • TherecanbeonlyoneAdmin

    I hope she's steel belted.

  • I always thought the 'L' in 'TLC' stood for 'Learning' as opposed to 'Leftover Odds and Ends of Programming That Even 'Spike' Thought Was Too Stupid.'

  • BLA

    Eating rubber: Building a spare tire for going absolutely nowhere.

  • TheAggroCraig

    Considering you already made a spare tire joke, I will hold off. This day is yours.

  • Django

    Good thing they cancelled What Not to Wear, could have started to get in the way of PEOPLE EATING TIRES WHAT THE FUCK

  • e jerry powell

    And now they've gone whole hog and given a ten-hour reality series to an entire trailer park. For reals.

    Who didn't see that coming?

  • DataAngel

    Oh. Oh... dear.... "Trailer Park Boys" was hard enough to watch and that was fake....

  • BWeaves

    What? They cancelled What Not To Wear? NOOOOOOOOOOO. It's almost the only show I watched.

  • DeltaJuliet

    Apparently there are a lot of calories in tire pieces.

  • jthomas666

    Well, radials are designed to spread...

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