Oh! Do Gambit Next! Professor X Sh*ts All Over And Fires The Most Useless X-Men
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Oh! Do Gambit Next! Professor X Sh*ts All Over And Fires The Most Useless X-Men

By Joanna Robinson | Videos | November 13, 2013 | Comments ()


One of my favorite comedians, Pete Holmes, has a new late night talk show on TBS and while the whole thing is still getting off the ground, there are enough gems to make me want to stick with it. Case in point, this delightful Ex-Men sketch where Holmes as Professor X fires the mutant Angel from his team. You remember Angel from the movie, right? Not even Ben Foster could save him?


Anyway, Holmes has a field day with this one. “You’re a f*cking bird! Flapping your wings as hard as your can to lift your stupid abs in the air.” I lost every single time he said “bird.” Who should he do next? Gambit, right? Or stupid Jubilee?

It reminds me of another great sketch from Pete Holmes’ frequent partner in crime TJ Miller.

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Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not

  • Uriah_Creep

    I'd give everything I own to see the real Professor X (aka Patrick Stewart) do these skits.

  • To be honest, I would totally go see a Hawkman movie. I'd give him or Green Arrow a movie before I'd give Ant-Man one. Hell, I'd give Plastic Man a movie before I did Ant-Man.

  • cweise01

    To be fair, calling Jubilee useless is pretty stupid. Before she got her powers taken away, she was considered to be one of the most powerful mutants if she fully used her powers to their potential. She could basically create atomic bombs at will with her brain, or cause you to have a stroke at any time. Nerd moment over.

  • kelleyisadork

    i think banshee is the worst. plus his costume is hideous.

  • Bryan

    With the Gambit and Wolverine ones there were plenty of defenders, people who were upset at how Xavier just disregarded the legitimately cool things they can do (which was part of the joke.) With Angel though... that guy really is completely useless. Hollow bones? Really, you're going to count on that kind of a physique in a brawl? Why not just name him Compound Fracture Guy? Even Marvel realized his lameness and made him into Archangel. But eventually they brought back his feathered wings... and upon RE-realizing how lame he is, gave him the metal ones back again.

    Oh, and I'd love if he did one with Magneto firing Xavier. "So I just put on my helmet and suddenly you're just a guy in a wheelchair? Okay then, I'm replacing you with someone whose power ISN'T completely nullified by a piece of headgear made in a high school metal shop. Enjoy standing in the unemployment line. Oh wait, you don't do much standing at all, do you?"

  • manting

    the 2nd link was awesome. Thanks.

  • foolsage

    Those were hilarious.

    However, counterpoint: Falcon's likely to be fairly badass in the new Cap movie, and all he does is fly.


  • e jerry powell

    But those are the worst CGI wings of EVER.

  • I didn't know this show existed but even if the Ex-men were the only good thing I'd watch it every day now.

  • Daniel Lewis

    Comes on right after Conan at midnight. Keep it crispy.

  • Conor

    Jubilee next, because she's the absolute worst and being terrible isn't gender specific.

  • Daniel Lewis

    I've seen Pete Holmes do standup live twice, and both times it was the best standup show I've ever seen.

  • Sassy Pikachu

    Also check out Professor X firing Wolverine!


  • CavemanGoGo

    He already did Gambit:


  • Ha!
    "I will call you if we're ever getting attacked in a ball pit,"

  • JoannaRobinson

    Perfection. Gracias!

  • ray

    Good call

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