I Would Totally Vote For This Republican
film / tv / lists / guides / news / love / celeb / video / think pieces / staff / podcasts / web culture / politics / dc / snl / netflix / marvel / cbr

I Would Totally Vote For This Republican

By Dustin Rowles | Videos | November 1, 2012 | Comments ()


Richard Tisei is a Republican running against eight-term Democrat John Tierney in the 6th Congressional District. I don't know a lot about him, but hey! He's a Massachusetts Republican, so how conservative can he really be? He's the minority leader of the state house, and he's openly gay. Plus, he has officially produced the best campaign ad of the season.

Five more days, folks. Then it's all over. That's probably the most peace you're going to get between now and election day. Savor it.

Infographic: What Your Favorite Shows Say About Your Politics | Was This The Most Twisted Plotline of 2012?

Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not

  • Buck Forty

    Republicans: we have the nicest beachfront properties...

  • Sara_Tonin00

    What are you if you're pro-life, anti-death penalty, pro-gun, and pro-welfare/Medicare?

    What are you if you believe in climate change and evolution?

    What are you if you're gay, think music and movies should have warning labels on them, are pro-two state solution for Israel, and think we should have universal healthcare?

    Why can't we have more than two parties already? Pretty please? Is there any chance that would get us to focus on issues rather than which "side" someone is on?

  • Gina

    We do have more than two parties. Pick one. Or even try to start one of your own.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    I am registered in a third party, because I would dearly like it to reach the 5% mark. Unfortunately, in NY that kinda bites me in the ass, because most elections are decided in the Democratic primaries, which I cannot vote in.,

  • Pookie

    The mere fact that this guy belongs to a party that thinks his entire being is an abomination tells me everything I need to know. How can you be gay and Republican is beyond my level of understanding. But luckily for him we already have a President that does give a fuck about him, as for the party he belongs to, not so much.

  • tamatha_uhmelmahaye

    Is that his house?!? Because I was just in Gloucester this past weekend, I cannot begin to guess how very, very expensive that house would be. How about a picture of the ocean without the house that could only belong to the very wealthy? See, he snuck in some Republican elitism subliminally: if you vote Republican, you too will be able to afford a mansion by the sea.

  • Boston Guy

    That's the house of a very successful Boston lawyer. I know the guy and have been to the house a number of times. Also gay and also a republican.

  • Slash

    Yeah, I kinda can't get over "Gay Republican," either. At this point, it's just a few clicks away from "Gay Nazi." Yeah, that's right, I Godwinned this bitch. Get over it.

  • googergieger

    Gay Republican eh? So is that like a straight gay porn actor? I think it is like being a straight gay porn actor. I'm going to start saying it is like being a straight gay porn actor. It is exactly like being a straight gay porn actor.

  • annie

    Ohio voter here. I feel like that 4 year old who cried and cried and cried.

  • lowercase_ryan

    I've noticed that on a personal level many republicans bristle at the suggestion that their party is "anti-gay". Most people don't like being labeled homophobes, but guess what? When you hitch your wagon to a political party who's platform seeks to deny rights to gays, on some level you are a homophobe.

  • Socrates_Johnson

    I half expected this end with the whistle from the Old Spice commercials. Either that or a Corona.

  • DalekKahn

    I guess I am the asshole for asking this question, but at what point did whether or not you care about your fellow man's sexual preference become the deciding factor in American politics?

  • TherecanbeonlyoneAdmin

    You could ask the same regarding skin colour.

  • TheLizard

    Maybe it's not so much the sexual preference, but the "openly" part.

  • annie

    With the combination of "Republican."

  • Socrates_Johnson

    As soon as America realized there were preferences other than straight.

  • Puddin

    Eh, they always realized it, they just never said it out loud.

  • Lauren Mckenzie

    I'm sure he's a fine fella, but there is no way I could ever respect a gay american choosing to be a part of the Republican Party. When they actively join a party whose platform includes the desire to create an ammendment to ban same-sex marriage, they are actively screwing over themselves and their fellow gays. You can be fiscally conservative and a democrat. You can believe in bringing down our debt and deficit in a reasonable way without screwing over those who most need our safety-nets. So for any Gay Republican to say that they're not only defined by social politics, and that's why they choose to be Republican... I say that 1. You're a fucking idiot 2. You're a fucking asshole and 3. You must have been stuck in some glittery disco-ball fancy gay cave for the 8 years that conservative polcies blew up our deficit and wrecked our economy. There is no good reason (not one, my friend) for a gay person to be a Republican.
    Also- side note.. i full-heartedly believe that anyone voting for Mitt Romney is either A. An idiot B. Misinformed or C. An asshole.

  • MKP

    I'll just add my two cents here, even though I should know better.

    But that's a little (OK, very) dickish of you. I have several friends who are gay and who will vote Republican. Really good, smart friends. Who are good people and are just trying to get along.

    They're not idiots. They're not misinformed. At least not more so than you seem to be. I haven't asked them why they're voting Republican, mostly because it's none of my goddamn business who they vote for, but I'm pretty damn sure that they'd be pretty pissed at you for deciding that they should base their entire political opinion on the fact that they're gay.

    I'm not a democrat or a republican. I don't give a shit, since I don't get to vote. But I find the idea that people are idiots or assholes simply because they don't agree with you pretty fucking repulsive.

    I know this won't matter much to you, but I'll just go ahead and say it: You're the asshole here. And you're not a good person. Keep patting yourself on the head and telling yourself that you have an open mind and that you know what's good for everybody, but you're wrong. If you really believe everything you said above, you're a horrible fucking person, and you're wrong.

    And if you can't see that, well, fuck, whatever. I don't even want to know you.

  • Jezzer

    No one is saying they are idiots or assholes for "disagreeing." We're saying they are idiots and assholes for supporting people that believe:

    A. Grown-ass women have no right to decide what to do with their own bodies, but a freshly-fertilized zygote is a full person with rights and protections. Victims of rape and incest should be forced to deal with a constant reminder of their violation, because everyone knows there are degrees of rape, and sometimes vagina-havers dress all slutty.

    B. There should be special privileges and protections under law for married couples, but only if they are of the penis/vagina variety. Double-P or Double-V couples should just be grateful to be allowed to call what they have a civil union (assuming, of course that civil unions aren't also stripped away from them by their state laws). And while we're at it, employers should be allowed to dismiss employees for being gay, just in case one of them decides to buttfuck the copier in front of a client or something.

    C. Freedom of religion means that religious ideals should be allowed to infiltrate every level of government and be shoved down the throats of the non-believers (unless, of course, it's one of those pesky brown religions); any attempt to uphold the separation of church and state is OPPRESSION.

    D. Health care should only be provided for the people who can afford it. If you're one of the working poor who puts in a full work week and still doesn't have health care coverage, you're obviously not working hard enough, or staying in a dead end job just to be difficult.

    E. Trying to ensure there is still livable land and breathable air generations from now is less important than making obscene amounts of profit now. Why, deregulating industry would solve everything! The industry would police itself, and workers who didn't like the conditions at their current job could have their choice from a plethora of other opportunities to lose limbs to whirling unshielded machinery!

    F. Buying non-American products is horrible and wrong, but shipping jobs overseas to make obscene amounts of profit is a sign of leadership and foresight. Creating jobs in Sri Lanka technically still counts as "job creation," after all.

    G. It's not gay if it's done through a hole in a bathroom stall.

    There's more, of course, but these are the ones that make me headdesk the most.

  • L.O.V.E.

    I'm confused. Evidently Republicans will vote for this man regardless of his sexual preference (or whether he splits from his party on a key issue such as gay marriage- I concede I'm not invested in this discussion enough to research all his positions or even the one on gay marriage), but they must be the bigoted ones in this discussion? His sexuality, though exceptionally important, is not the only aspect of his identity. Neither of us is really qualified to speak for him, but by what we know of him thus far he would rather not be defined strictly by this singular characteristic. Both sides would be wise to take a step back, watch the shore break, and not be so quick to pigeon hole what our leaders are allowed to be.

  • Pookie

    No one is trying to speak for him, although his party will be speaking for him. His party will not let him chair any committees, nor will his party let him speak for the party. His party will expect him to vote the way they want him to vote. He will be told to sit in a corner quietly and dummy-up.

  • L.O.V.E.

    He's the minority leader of the state house. As in, all the other Republicans voted for him to be their leader.

    But I'm sure they just did it ironically and laugh at him in the capitol hallways while planning to dump pigs blood on him at the Governor's Ball.

  • Pookie

    Riiiight, because the halls of power in Washington is full of openly gay Republicans calling shots. But you might indeed be right, this guy could be the first Republican Barney Frank.

  • Reason

    What if he is gay and pro-life, and in his mind his inability to have a wedding is outweighed by the prospect of ending millions of baby murders? That would be a good reason for him, I think. Every rational person has to consider what they agree with a particular party or candidate about and weigh that against what they disagree about and make a decision. Neither party is completely wrong or completely right, and two people with the exact same beliefs can vote differently based on how they rank those beliefs in importance. Anyone who believes entirely that one party platform is right in all things and the other is wrong is most likely insane, and I doubt that Richard Tisei will worry too much about losing thier respect.

  • Cree83

    I know this wasn't your point, but if he's gay and pro-life, perhaps he should consider the fact that countries with more restrictive abortion laws actually have higher abortion rates.


    Meanwhile, in Sweden, where abortions are legal in all circumstances, the abortion rate is lower than in the U.S.

    Perhaps it would make sense for pro-life gay candidate to support the party that not only promotes his civil rights, but also promotes policies that increase access to birth control, since that actually has been proven to decrease the number of abortions.

    Unless the empty rhetoric of saying he's against abortion is more important than actually saving lives.

  • Clay

    Your beliefs stated in your side note are what's part of the problem. We are going no where because of attitudes like this. You can believe what you want but don't be a fucking assdick about it. Yes, I said assdick.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    The more Republicans there are who define themselves by fiscal standards and not by social standards, the more the Republican party will be made up of people who don't promulgate those social standards.

  • Puddin

    I too believe that other people who don't think like me are idiots and assholes. I usually save it for important matters, though, like people who think "Hey Dude" was better than "Salute Your Shorts"

    How about none of us (ON EITHER SIDE) dismiss the viewpoints and belief system of half of our fellow citizens as idiotic or asshole-ey? It's so reductive.

  • Long_Pig_Tailor

    Who. The. Fuck. Thinks "Hey Dude" was better than "Salute Your Shorts"?

    I focus on the important issues.

  • PerpetualIntern

    Now I have the Salute Your Shorts theme song stuck in my head. And it's AWESOME.

  • Puddin

    I love you.

  • lowercase_ryan

    In most cases I think you're right, but in the case of gay republicans you are dead wrong. This isn't about whether or not you agree with someone or not and it certainly isn't about dismissing half of our fellow citizens. I think it's safe to say that far fewer than half of this country is comprised of gay republicans.

    By identifying himself as a republican this man is actively promoting and supporting a political party that aggressively tries to prevent him from having the same rights as the rest of the country. A black person voting to support Jim Crow laws illustrates the same contradiction. On what planet are the people in either example not idiots?

  • Puddin

    Jim Crow laws began and ended with the systematic oppression of a race. Opposition to gay marriage is one of over a dozen issues the GOP platform raises. That analogy is false.

    I would venture to say that his belief IN the other ideals of the GOP (fiscal conservatism, etc.) far outweigh his distaste in same sex marriage opposition. And that his belief in those ideals gave him the courage to become part of a party that might not welcome him in order to help change that party. When viewed from that lens, he's not an idiot, he's pretty courageous.

  • Slash

    Fiscal conservatism is not a Republican ideal. It just isn't. Hasn't been for a long time.

  • lowercase_ryan

    You think the people that enacted Jim Crow laws had no other concerns? No other political beliefs? There were other issues in 1876, of which Jim Crow laws were one. The analogy is not false.

    So someone who places their belief in fiscal policy over their own legal inequality is courageous? That's the biggest bunch of bullshit I've ever heard.

  • Puddin

    I suggest you look at Reason's response below. That sums up my own feelings on the matter pretty nicely. It also saves me from typing, so, you know, yay.

    I just refuse to summarily hate people based on their political party. The whole thing just makes me sad and tired all over.

  • Cree83

    Not all ways of thinking are created equal. Not all are worthy of respect. When the republican party's platform stops telling me that my sister can't marry her girlfriend because it destroys straight marriage, then I'll stop thinking republicans are idiots and assholes.

  • Puddin

    Maybe not all ideas deserve respect, but all people do. Vitriol and hatred (you're a racist! you're a baby killer!) do NOTHING but pit American against American, human against human.
    There will never, ever, ever be homogenous thought in a country of over 300 million people. Like ever, ever, ever. Either we start figuring out a way to engage in debate, find common ground, and practice some mutual respect for each other, all of us are fucked. Politics should never be a zero sum game.

  • Jezzer

    No, all people do NOT deserve respect. Respect can be earned and lost. In a polite society, they might deserve courtesy, but courtesy and respect are not the same thing by a long shot.

  • lowercase_ryan

    Since when is respect unconditional? Everyone has my respect to start out with, the onus is on them if I maintain that respect or not.

  • catagisreading

    I work from a respect is to be earned perspective and some people simply do not earn it e.g. people who think they have the right to tell me what to do with my ladyparts, or people who think they have the right to decide who others should marry.

  • Cree83

    It's very insulting to tell people that they must "play nice" with the kinds of individuals that are trying to oppress, degrade, and devalue them. People have a right to be angry when their rights are being trampled on. And pointing out hatred and inequality is not the root problem. Bigotry is what divides human against human. Perhaps it is their responsibility to look at themselves in the mirror and evolve - it is not my responsibility to sugarcoat the hurtful effects of their backwards ideas and hold their hands through the process of changing for the better.

  • Puddin

    Of course its not your responsibility to play nice. You're an adult, make your own choices. Be aware that the consequence of that choice is to create more anger, entrench people in their ideals even more, and create a greater divide. If you truly, truly believe that that is the best way to enact positive change, then go for it. However, I happen to feel very differently. Hatred is hatred is hatred, whether under the umbrella of bigotry or moral righteousness. Empathy, understanding, and compromise just work better, in my opinion. And yeah, it's hard. It's really fucking hard. Thats why people like arguing with emotion--it's easier.

  • Cree83

    People have managed to effect incredibly positive changes while still calling evil what it is.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    Thank you.

    How about even moreso, we don't think of ourselves as being on just one side or the other?

  • lowercase_ryan

    D. All of the above.

  • 724wd

    so you don't know anything about him or his politics, but you'd vote for him because he's got a nice ad and is gay?

    I'm all for the cool ad and being gay is of no consequence to me, but i'd like to know how he votes before i'd pull a lever (hee hee) for him.

  • BWeaves

    You get to pull a lever? Nice. I'm still in Florida. Home of the hanging chad.

  • Groundloop

    My understanding of your political system is that "hanging chad" is the election season version of "hanging dong".

  • 724wd

    not really, the whole state is mail-in (WA).

  • pajiba

    He understands what the people want, and that is not to hear about politics anymore.

blog comments powered by Disqus