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And on the Fourth Day the Internet Gave Me Evil Toasters: "Battlestar Galactica: Blood and Chrome" Episodes One and Two

By Steven Lloyd Wilson | Videos | November 12, 2012 | Comments ()


Thumbnail image for BloodChrome.mp4_000005505.jpg

In 2003, I fell in love more deeply than I would have ever thought possible. That TiVo, with its quaint 40 gigabyte hard drive is still in a box in my garage, sleeping away eternity with the rest it earned over and over again. The greatest ba-boop my old friend ever chimed was in the late autumn of that year, as the leaves began to change (that's a blatant lie, leaves don't change in California, but I digress). It said, I see that you've been recording "Stargate SG1" in such quantities that it's pulling down from four different channels from four different points in the show's run, and while normally I might see if you were interested in Spanish language soap operas, this time, just this time, I'll suggest that you might be interested in this "Battlestar Galactica" miniseries.

My response was less than eager. I had little need for remakes of low budget television rip offs of Star Wars from the 1970s. I mean I had standards. I was busy watching a television remake of a bad 1990s science fiction movie. But then I got the worst cold of my life, a flu-nasal-ebola hybrid that wrecked me for a week. I couldn't talk. I couldn't walk. I couldn't eat. I could not function at anything approaching sentience. Ba-doop. Ba-doop. But I could watch "Stargate".

And by the end of the sickness there was no "Stargate" left and from the bowels of the recommended section at the bottom of my TiVo emerged a choice. I could venture forth from my sick bed and try to learn to live again, or I could watch "Battlestar Galactica".

It healed me my friends, it healed me.

And now in this post-modern age, where all the joys of the past go to die, mere fertilizer for new wonders that our 2003-selves would not recognize, I don't need a TiVo to give me more "Battlestar Galactica", I need only my precious precious Internet access.

The first two episodes of "Blood and Chrome" are below:




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Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not


  • Dragonchild

    I'm still looking for someone to quantify why BSG is good; not merely insist it is. I swear, I'm capable of understanding a coherent argument; I'm just waiting for one. Pretty please? Is it the characters? Starbuck is as much a Mary Sue as I've ever seen. The rest are otherwise competent individuals with one glaring weakness (TM) (alcoholism, brainwash, cancer, etc.) that puts them exactly one step above Disney sidekicks in terms of complexity. The plot/writing? Pick a controversial issue of the day (terrorism, torture, etc.), create some contrived tension between characters (namely either "don't trust anyone" or idealism vs. pragmatism, both yawningly beaten-to-death GenX deconstruction cliches) that invariably lead to moral crisis and lay on the drama thick. The premise? That an obsolete AND infiltrated ship with a drunk in charge is able to succeed where the combined fleet (which presumably contains SOME elite teams that aren't as comically dysfunctional) didn't? The tone? I can take dark, but when existential cynicism is ALWAYS the right choice (and OK as long as someone feels bad about it) I'm on a one-way trip to the Eight Deadly Words ("I don't care what happens to these people").
    Sorry if that's a lot of whining, but that's what I see. I honestly feel lonely here because a lot of friends whose opinions I genuinely respect fell hard for this show without much explanation. The thing is, I'll typically concede a work is "quality" even if it's not my cup o' tea but BSG just didn't impress me. So there's a real disconnect between respect for others' opinions and my failure to even objectively see why this show is so awesome. That does leave wide open the possibility that I'm the only knucklehead, but whenever I ask for reasons I get circular arguments, most often that it's good because the writing is good. Uh, that doesn't help.

  • Strand

    BSG remake is good, but it's by no means the BEST TV show. It showed us that SF was a credible setting for drama, even if its attempts to be topical were a little too on-the-nose (zealous, monotheistic suicide bombers and The Abortion Episode come to mind), and how you could actually create a good-looking, believable universe on a shoestring budget.

    Of course, season 3 and especially 4 just went right off the deep end and buried the plot under piles of pseudo-religious psychobabble. However, I can ignore its awful, awful, AWFUL end simply because the miniseries and first 2 seasons were so brilliant.

  • socallmeshirley

    I enjoyed BSG about half the time and loathed it the other half. I always felt like it thought it was a better show than it was. It was self-serious to a fault.

  • Dragonchild

    I never quite put my finger on that but you're right. On one hand, the series executed a lot of fine details so well I was seriously pulling for it. The actors obviously bought into their roles; I had an "oh wow" moment when one of them stopped short of washing his hands during a water shortage. But on the other, the extent to which the characters had no healthy forms of catharsis (it was almost entirely vices or emotional self-flagellation) was so bad it actually broke up suspension of disbelief.

  • idiosynchronic

    You lost it when you called Starbuck a Mary Sue. Here's some edumacation that you'll ignore - http://thehathorlegacy.com/wha... - and now go suck something diseased.

  • idiosynchronic

    It's decent enough so far. Poor script, inane militaristic contrivances. Pretty, pretty effects - unless you think Lens Flare 11.0 (with more FLARE, and overexposure) is annoying. It's entertaining in the best SyFy mold.

    Except I've never met any steamy accented software engineers that have cleavage like that.

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