Pajiba

This is clearly a case of coming up with a title in the shower and working backwards.

Dear Pajiba,

You've shown my trailer. That means I win. I'll expect Michael Bay's head on a platter by noon tomorrow.

Peace,
TP

But, Kathy Bates? Academy Award winning Kathy Bates? Misery? Dolores Claiborne? Fried Green Tomatoes? Rat Race?

Oh, right. She doesn't always pick the winners, does she?

Kathy Bates? ARE YOU F'ING KIDDING ME? The answer to your question is "NO". Apparently you aren't done paying for whatever sin caused you to be in this monstrosity.

Kathy Bates? ARE YOU F'ING KIDDING ME? The answer to your question is "NO". Apparently you aren't done paying for whatever sin caused you to be in this monstrosity.

Posted by: courtney at September 5, 2008 9:48 AM

She was in "Titanic". Does it still count as a sin if she was one of the better characters in the film?

zomg! I have to see this!!! I HAVE to see this!!! As a woman of color I have been waiting for the day when talented black actors and talented white actors can come together and make a fucking terrible Tyler Perry movie.
And that bitch from Misery is in this. I love that white bitch!!

Is this a Lifetime Original? Because if it's not, and was produced by an actual studio, I will eat my hat.

Not really; it's a new hat. I just got it for the Chargers' 2008-09 season. But I will eat Che's beret.

But I will eat Che's beret.

Sorry Mella, but given the posts in some of the
other threads, that sounds dirty to me.

Oh my, your mention of Che's beret just sent me a wonderful image. I had never actually considered the name until now. I suddenly see a Blue Muppet in one of those green jackets and with the beard. He's igniting revolution on Sesame Street. Oscar's trash can is on fire and you don't want to know about Mr. Snuffleupagus.

Not Snuffleupagus! He's a peaceful creature! He was a conscientious objector, man! He's not like you, he's fragile!

You've shown my trailer. That means I win. I'll expect Michael Bay's head on a platter by noon tomorrow.

Mr. Perry, you're not exactly hitting us where it hurts. I'm holding back a stampede of eager redshirts here on MurderMaid anxious to meet your demand. As it is, I suspect Sir Rowles is already out platter-hunting with Nosek in some antique store, and various other Pajiban-demi-gods are already debating various smiting methods. Not smart to get in the way when they get all smitey. You'll have his head on time, I'd say. Now, if you ever release another trailer on me, I'll send my rabid redshirts your way with orders to return with your head, testicles nasally implanted and everything.

And that bitch from Misery is in this. I love that white bitch!!

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA!!!!!! I can't breathe!!!!!

So Tyler Perry has realized that the only thing more evil that a rich black man is a rich white man.

But just in case we thought he was changing up, he made sure to include the poor black man with a heart of gold, the successful black women who care more for their power and positions that anyone else, and even put in a little touch of Magical Negro and Clueless Cracker.

And of course, more patented Tyler Perry mugging it up in ridiculous makeup.

Just when I think it is safe for me to forget my own ideas for world domination, he manages to remind me why I am doing what I do.

P.S. I have to say though: can you really blame Cole Hauser for falling for Sanaa Lathan? Did you SEE the other chick? She didn't have a chance in hell!

can you really blame Cole Hauser for falling for Sanaa Lathan?

Aww, Cole Hauser is still alive? Good for him, I thought he was eating Toblerones and watching a double feature of The Skulls and School Ties with Joshua Jackson in hell.

Oh Julie, you don't know what you just did to me!!!

Tob-le-rones Tob-le-rones! Tob-le-rones!

Three cheers for duty free!

Oh my, your mention of Che's beret just sent me a wonderful image. I had never actually considered the name until now. I suddenly see a Blue Muppet in one of those green jackets and with the beard. He's igniting revolution on Sesame Street. Oscar's trash can is on fire and you don't want to know about Mr. Snuffleupagus.

Posted by: Optimus Rhyme at September 5, 2008 12:27 PM

So much going on, so little attention to spare.

No cause for alarm over Mr. Snuffleupagus. Hearing that "Ohhh, dear" over and over again was simply annoying, so he was escorted from the premises. The rest of the M-Team has thrown off the shackles of its captors, however, and the puppet revolution is underway. CNN already has exclusive footage; the puppets from Fox News have been detained and sent away for deprogramming.

I would advise against trying to consume the beret, Mella. Do you remember Oddjob from Goldfinger? I use the same haberdasher...

Power to the Puppets, Che.

TP NEEDS A BEATING. WITH A BELT SOAKED IN COW'S URINE. NOTHING STINGS LIKE A BELT SOAKED IN COW'S URINE.

Hrm. Based on the poster that's up EVERYWHERE here, I figured that the plot of this movie was going to be entirely different. I figured Kathy Bates was going to be the grandam of some old southern family who kidnapped precious little black children and sold them into slavery or something and all the white people in the town know about it, but don't want to do anything. Until one poor black man looses his daughter and decides to take the law into his own hands/fight the corrupt legal system of the local administration. Kind of "Not Without My Daughter" meets "Mississippi Burning".

I think I like my version better.

Vermillion your stereotypical response to Tyler Perry's stereotypical movie is so very stereotypical. Oh I almost forgot V, when do you start shooting your pilot? I hope your meeting with CAA went well. WOW, you're going to be the first guy I know personally to make it big in show business, well not personally because you know, we both hang out on a fucking third rate movie review site. Come to think of it, if I were going into show business I wouldn't be dicking around on a website in the middle of the fucking day, I'd be taking phone calls and planning my takeover of the industry.

You stupid ass white folks are so ridiculous! Every movie doesn't have to be about white people for it to be good! Tyler Perry's movies have made more than most of your dumb asses have made in your stupid ass lifetimes. You don't have to like his movies; black folks are tired of always having to watch some of your stupid ass movies! You don't have to pay money to see the film, so why be so belittling?

"...black folks are tired of always having to watch some of your stupid ass movies! You don't have to pay money to see the film, so why be so belittling?

Posted by: RDF at September 9, 2008 8:00 PM

------------------------------------------------
I know for FACT, that you don't speak for all "black folk."

So speak for yourself...homey.

You tell those white devils a thing or two RDF X.