“Are we going to the puppy parade or not, because this is starting to feel like a bottle episode.”
I wouldn’t do that. I hate bottle episodes. They’re wall to wall facial expressions and emotional nuance. I might as well sit in the corner with a bucket on my head.”
“Mother hen? I think we’re about the same age. / Sure, unless time is linear. / I’ll make your ass linear. / That doesn’t make any sense. / I’ll make your ass sense.”
“Tell your disappointment to suck it. I’m doing a bottle episode. “
(Jeff, asked if he has a bag) “I could never deprive the world the portion of my chest the strap would cover. “
(Abed, sarcastically) “I want to say thank you for doing this to me. For a while I thought I’d have to suffer through a puppy parade, but I much prefer being entombed alive in a mausoleum of feelings I can neither understand or reciprocate.”
“Are they seriously marketing pregnancy tests to black women?”
“I’m worried we’ve gone too far. This is how supervillains are created.”
“Can’t you just make an inspiring Winger speech about trust, throw in a few digs at an easy celebrity target, and put a ribbon on this thing?”
30 Rock (Grade A-)
“OM God, those jeans are zing.” / “This online slang dictionary says it short for amazing. Or it’s a club drug made from a tooth whitener.”
“And Cable Town still has an auxiliary button on their remote. What does that do? It just makes the screen go blue.”
(Tracy) “As you know, I was in a film called Hard to Watch.”
“If we have to have a government, make it as small as possible. Dwarves. Tiny buildings. Pizza bagels for lunch.”
“I trust awards shows. They tell me how much to care about different dead people.”
“If they could be bribed, I’d have won a Golden Globe for my Lifetime movie, Sister, Can You Spare a Breast.
(Re: the Youth Vote) “Our generation never votes. It interferes with us talking about ourselves all the time.”
“That movie gave me drunk-in-the-bathtub face.”
“You were right about Brooklyn without Limits. Crunch on the outside. Right-wing nutjob on the inside.” / “Like Ann Coulter’s underwear.”
“I’ll be furious. Like, waking up next to Rob Schneider furious.”
“Ah! Lesbian Mario Brothers!”
“Compromises are for lesser souls. Die, Werewolf Zombie!
“Letting morality get in the way of money?! I just oughta go be a … teacher.”
I don’t know what Tastetations are, but the Liz Lemon line about them provoked Mrs. Pajiba-hyphenate into a full half-hour of laughter.
The Office (Grade: C-)
“Wow, so much Asian stuff. I wonder if there’s a guy in China right now looking at a bunch of our stuff.”
“Which one’s Glee?”
Each Time You Like, Share, Tweet or Stumble a Pajiba Post, An Angel Does the Paul Rudd Dance
Ed Helms' manic seahorse-induced moment was HILARIOUS. Dude's brilliant. I was just annoyed that we got YET AGAIN an episode where Michael turns into a complete baby. I get that Michael's childishness is a huge part of the show, but at some point you have to make the character at least START to grow up, or you're just stuck in a rut forever. When's Holly coming back?
And oh, Roger Sterling on 30 Rock? Brilliant. And shirtless. Dresses as a baby. Woohoo!
SPOILER
I'll type it in incomprehensible as a safety measure
u ken totes c wutwut penned 2 d "en" from da P n da sin wid da babes dawg n t-bone wuz all lyk i wanna tongue it yo coz u hav 2 eyeballz da tabes ball bsidez "bed" to da A
Posted by: arrrghzi at November 12, 2010 11:12 AM
OK, it took me a long time and, frankly, another person to decipher what you wrote up there, arrrghzi. Now that I get it, though, it's making me giggle.
Posted by: coveredinbees at November 12, 2010 11:45 AM
What about Troy's important question: Do weiner dogs start out that way? Or are they born normal and turn weiner?
Posted by: Dorothy Snarker at November 12, 2010 11:51 AM
Raising Hope on Tuesday had a couple good ones. The dad character was discussing how bleak starting a job at the entry level was....."you'd be the low man on the totem pole...have you ever seen a totem pole?...you are at the bottom with like six guys and an eagle on top of you...that's no way to live".
Paraphrased a bit but hilarious. Favorite new show.
Posted by: Drew Rhodes at November 12, 2010 12:26 PM
Michael's shtick is becoming played out. Do you think that they are turning him into a self-aware five year old EVERY episode so that when Steve Carell leaves at the end of the season, we don't feel so bad?
Posted by: alphawhiskey at November 12, 2010 1:11 PM
One good reason to watch Community - Alison Brie - er, I guess that's two good reasons.
Posted by: sosumi at November 12, 2010 1:47 PM
OMG, a bottle episode AND a deus ex machina. Or, I guess, a simius ex machina.
I ::heart:: hulu.
Posted by: Anna von Beav at November 12, 2010 1:56 PM
Once again, Troy FTW. During the discussion of 1984: "Do they find thoughts in our butts? I KNEW I should have read that book!"
Uhm, just to let you know, it's "Kable Town," with a K.
Posted by: Jasper Buckleman at November 12, 2010 3:21 PM
the best part of community was the actual puppy parade in the end tag. am i the only one that would totally attend something like that? i especially liked the equality and togetherness float with kitten and puppy side by side. preachy? maybe. but certainly not deserving of such a booo by the dean.
Posted by: michkabibbles at November 12, 2010 3:52 PM
@ Drew Rhodes: heck. YES. That show has more laugh out loud moments than any of the other comedies I watch combined. Plus, it has a healthy dose of heart-melting, sweet moments. I heart this show so hard, I've been pimping it out to anyone who will listen.
Posted by: Jessie at November 12, 2010 3:56 PM
wow. I thought all these episodes were terrible - there wasn't a single laugh in Community.
Posted by: seth at November 12, 2010 5:22 PM
One of the best parts of 30 Rock was the campaign ads for the lunatic played by the guy who plays the older guy on "Mad Men."
John Whatshisface. Sorry, I know his name but it escapes me at the moment. Yeah, I could Google it but I don't care that much.
Posted by: Slash at November 12, 2010 5:28 PM
I also continue to love "Raising Hope." That show rocks and so does everyone on it. Even the baby, who is one of the top 5 cutest babies I've ever seen.
Posted by: Slash at November 12, 2010 5:36 PM
John Slattery, and he is a silver fox. I love him on Mad Men, even if most of the time I'm just dazzled by the Hamm (HAAAAAAAAAMM!).
This week's Community was hilarious. My boyfriend and I laughed so hard at some points that I missed substantial plot development. I started the whole thing over again after The Office. I liked 30 Rock too. I'm with Mrs. Pajiba-hyphenate in that I laughed uncontrollably at that Tastetations line. I've gotta say, I think Tina Fey has a better ass than the person playing Liz Lemon's hot new ass. The two women weighed within five pounds of each other. As for The Office, it was okay. The pizzas looked good.
Posted by: becks at November 12, 2010 7:11 PM
Tastetations were great. My mom used to buy them for me when I was a kid.
Posted by: Lucas at November 12, 2010 9:14 PM
Possibly my favorite 30Rock thing ever:
"Compromises are for lesser souls. Die, Werewolf Zombie!"
Community (my favorite show) did not make me laugh this time. Maybe I need to watch it again.
Posted by: John G. at November 12, 2010 10:30 PM
community drops the ball again.
and where the hell is Ken Jeong?
Posted by: haplo at November 13, 2010 2:16 PM
If you thought they dropped the ball, then you are watching the wrong sport.
Posted by: JakesAlterEgo at November 13, 2010 11:34 PM
You forgot - ..."making political hay out for the wheat field that is the NBC-Kabletown merger" seriously? who is writing this?
Posted by: Sarah Barkai at November 14, 2010 4:54 AM
Community was brilliant this week. My favorite line:
"EWWWW, it smells like a wafflehouse sink!"
I've never smelled a wafflehouse sink, but I'm still laughing at that line.
Posted by: Chickaboom at November 14, 2010 6:39 PM
"there wasn't a single laugh in Community"
...and our emotionless robot overlords have arrived to rule us all. All hail seth, John. G and haplo!
Onward towards the uprising fair fans of comedy!
Posted by: Ender at November 15, 2010 11:58 AM
"Uh, have you ever been to a puppy parade half-way through? It's pointless" ~ Troy
"Michael. I made a list of all the people who wouldn't storm out with you. Kelly, Andy, me, but only at first." ~ Dwight
Community killed this week.
Posted by: Littlejon2001 at November 15, 2010 4:54 PM
Explain again why you grade these episodes when you're so against setting up a ratings system at Pajiba?