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Last Night's Monumental "New Girl" Summarized in GIF Form

By Dustin Rowles | TV Reviews | May 1, 2013 | Comments ()


When it opened, it looked like Nick and Jess were over.

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But then everyone started telling their virginity stories. We found out, for instance, that Mick Jagger stamped Cece's V-Card, which elicited an excited, but confused reaction from Schmidt.

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Fat Schmidt's virginity losing experience involved lubricant. A LOT OF IT.

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But it was for a good cause.

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Nick was impressed.

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Jess had a long convuluted story about losing her virginity, which began at prom, and ended up with her with the guy from MTV's Teen Wolf stuck in a kid castle, where the guy confessed that he realized it wasn't the anti-depressants that were softening his shrinky, it was his gayness.

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Anyway, Winston lost his virginity to a prostitute procured by Nick's father, which reminded Nick of some advice his old man gave him: "Don't think about it."

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Nick didn't think about it.

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What's that, Schmidt?

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Yeah it is. This is what's going on in Nick's brain.

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This is what's going on in Jess' head.

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And this is what's going on inside of Schmidt's brain.

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