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Daytime's Most Complicated Woman


Pajiba's Trash TV: "Judge Judy" / Michael Murray

TV Reviews | April 30, 2009 | Comments (27)


Even though the bailiff on Judge Judy doesn’t really do anything, I still think he’s my favorite part of the show. His name is Petri Hawkins-Byrd, and as far as I can tell, his primary job is to look unimpressed. A hulking 51 year-old black man, he looms above the plaintiffs with his arms crossed and head tilted skeptically, as if he’s just asking you to test him. He very rarely says anything, and when he does it’s usually terse and sarcastic, acting the straight man to the mouthy and acerbic Judge Judy. But really, his primary job is to intimidate, to step in and deliver the hurt should anybody ever put it into their fool head to try to throttle the shrill and scrawny judge.

“Judge Judy,” which debuted in 1996, has been a staple of afternoon TV from the start, having been nominated for 11 Daytime Emmy Awards, which seems a somewhat dubious distinction. No matter, the classic show is presided over by 66 year-old Judge Judith Sheindlin. A tough as nails New Yorker, she’s always reminded me of the bitchy grandmother who was never satisfied with the way you mowed her lawn. There’s something utterly loveless in her approach, and this, of course, is what makes her show television gold.

On the program, Sheindlin, who was an actual family courts judge back in the day, arbitrates over small claims. For the most part, the matters brought before her are petty, poorly articulated affairs. This, inevitably, leads Judge Judy to lose her shit, causing her to humiliate and eviscerate whoever has the misfortune to be standing in front of her and an audience of millions.

As you might imagine, the plaintiffs, who have found themselves settling their affairs in a fake court on daytime TV, are not the cream of the crop. Think of Jerry Springer guests dressed up and behaving for church, and you pretty much have the right idea.

A typical episode, like one I saw the other day, featured a woman who was suing her ex for assault and failure to repay a loan. She wore her sharpest pantsuit, and had a look on her face that was simultaneously focused and uncertain. When she began to speak, her cocky ex began to interrupt and speak over her. The judge was having none of it, silencing him with vicious looks and barked commands. The defendant, his own worst enemy, was barely able to contain himself, and although he remained mostly quiet, his face became a concert of aggrieved and disbelieving expressions which he had the class to embellish by making the “she’s nuts ” motion by his head whenever his ex said something he disagreed with.

In no time at all, both parties were caught up in a digressive and bitter tangle of mutual accusations and justifications. They were no longer talking about what happened, but why it happened, and clearly what they were really after was emotional compensation, rather than financial. They wanted reassurance and validation, in front of the entire world, that they were the sane one and it was the other one who was nuts. Really, they just want to be heard and the truth is the show is more therapy than justice, with each episode carrying with it the emotional catharsis of a soap opera.

In this particular episode, the smug ex-boyfriend was easy to hate, but the judge hardly paid any attention to him. Instead, she focused on the woman, tearing holes in her narrative of helplessness and abuse. Judge Judy, coming across as the streetwise voice of experience, dismissed the victim status the plaintiff draped around herself. It was actually kind of difficult to watch, as you could see whatever confidence the woman had tried to fashion for her big day in “court” drain right out of her, while her preening ex, just a few feet away, smirked like the abusive dink he most surely was.

It’s clear from watching that the attitude Judge Judy has toward women is complex. The pre-feminist Sheindlin was the only woman, out of 126 students, in her class at the Washington College of Law. Obviously, this must have been an extremely difficult and chauvinistic environment, but it seems that instead of making her more sympathetic to the plight of women, it’s hardened her. Rising from a man’s world, before the ascension of feminism, she’s grown to have little sympathy for entitlements or excuses, expecting everybody to just suck it up, exactly the way that she did some 40 years earlier.

It’s a curious position to assume on a daytime TV show, where the majority of viewers are women, but it’s been successful, managing to tap into a sort of cannibalistic voyeurism. There’s a sense of Schadenfreude that permeates “Judge Judy,” and it’s easy to imagine the audience at home— like the paid extras playing the courtroom audience on set— tittering like happy gossips when they see one of their own reach out and ask for more than they deserve, only to be slapped down, also, by one of their own.

Michael Murray is a freelance writer. For the last three and a half years he’s written a weekly column for the Ottawa Citizen about watching television. He presently lives in Toronto. You can find more of his musings on his blog, or check out his Facebook page.


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Comments

Never thought I'd see this on pajiba. I have to admit, I adore this show. It's completely my mom's fault - it's been family viewing for years now (great memories and all that).

But I don't think Judy has anything against women. She just hates stupid people (which is why I love her). If those stupid people should happen to be of the female variety, that's no reason for them to get special treatment - and that's true feminism.

Posted by: dsbs at April 30, 2009 4:39 PM

I used to watch this years ago and dropped it when I got tired of her particular shtick and Judge Joe Brown came along.

I never noticed an anti-feminist vibe though.

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at April 30, 2009 4:43 PM

I used to watch this show a lot with my dad--it's very addictive! And I agree with teh commenter above, Judge Judy will be nice to you so long as you follow two rules: (1) don't try to lie, because you're not smart enough to lie well, and (2) don't be an idiot. Follow those, and you're fine!

Posted by: Bd at April 30, 2009 4:56 PM

I love Judge Judy. I've watched her since the show started, and I just cant get over how stupid some of the people that come before her are. I watched the episode that you were discussing, and i cringed through the whole thing. "Have you ever dealt with domestic abuse" I couldnt believe the girl had the balls to say that! She's been a family court judge forever!
I sometimes wonder if the people who come before her have ever watched the program. I have to agree with dsbs though, I think that she is a true feminist in every sense of the word - she is independent, articulate, educated, a working mom/grandma/great-grandma! I dont think that she should baby these brainless twits, just because she is a woman and had to come up through "a mans world." If anything I think she is right to demand more of these women (and men), because clearly no one else has. I agree there is a bit of delight in watching her tear them down a bit, but most of the time I find myself changing the channel while she is really giving it to them...though most of the time you can see it coming withing the first 30 seconds of the trial. I can see why she does it though, I'd get tired of the same crap over and over every day.
I've seen her on many other programs, and she is less of a stone cold bitch when she is out of her robe. I think she is progressive in her views on the world considering the era she grew up in.
I love her!! I hope she's on air for 12 more years and then some!!!

Posted by: elusive at April 30, 2009 4:57 PM

Bite your tongue: Judge Judy was first in her class at New York Law School. Girlfriend was a judge in NYC's Family Court - that shit will harden you (I say this as a divorce lawyer). I don't think she's anti-woman, I think she's anti-shenanigans.

I never really watched the show, but I saw her on Suze Orman (a fave of mine) and she was totally down-to-earth and sassy.

Posted by: samantha t at April 30, 2009 5:03 PM

I love Judge Judy. She is a hardass to the people who need it the most, even if they don't always get it. I think she is fair to women. But when she smells bullshit, she goes for the jugular. I guess dealing with acutal abused women has given her very little sympathy for the manipulators hoping to gain an edge in court.

Posted by: grinder at April 30, 2009 5:22 PM

What Judy's experiences have taught her is that a woman's unfortunate situation often has little to do with men pushing her around and plenty to do with the inability to tear herself away from her own bullshit. That's not anti-feminist: we keep ourselves down when we act like fools and then cry victim.

Posted by: RhymesWithSilver at April 30, 2009 5:28 PM

The woman is an artist. She finds people who are masters at holding themselves blameless and beautifully, righteously, holds them accountable for their actions. Her assessments of character are both spot-on and vindictive, both lovable qualities.

Posted by: Brook at April 30, 2009 5:31 PM

Oh, how I love this show. I rarely get to watch it since I'm at work when it's on. However, I just happened to be hom elast week with a sick child when this episode was on and it was a train wreck all around. I will hop on the bandwagon with everyone else and agree that I think she's more anti-stupid than anti-woman. I have seen her be extremely sympathetic to women on the show.

Posted by: Elsie at April 30, 2009 5:31 PM

Judge Judy, anti-woman? Oh, please... She's so big a feminist that she gets pissed at dumb women (or "marginal people", as she calls them) who prove chauvinistic men right. I totally get it.

Posted by: Sofía's Identical Hand Twin at April 30, 2009 5:38 PM

"I guess dealing with acutal abused women has given her very little sympathy for the manipulators hoping to gain an edge in court."

I must admit that I have fallen prey to the same callousness...and I worry about it. Our clients often trump up abuse charges to get an edge in a divorce (we don't suborn perjury, of course, but a client alleges what a client alleges). I've had clients maintain "I feared for my LIFE" and I'm secretly like "Bitch, please." I'm not proud of it, but it's true.

The kid stuff, though? That I always take seriously.

Posted by: samantha t at April 30, 2009 5:47 PM

i always thought of judge judy as a pretty strong feminist who hates stupid people and liars, regardless of gender.

she's very intolerant of domestic violence, whether toward women or children and seems to have a special kind of hatred for parents (turns out they are usually mothers on the show) who are raising their daughters to have no self-respect or their sons to have no respect for others.

Posted by: celery at April 30, 2009 6:02 PM

I used to scoff at the very idea of this show. But once, when I was stuck in the house while my boyfriend worked and I didn't want to go anywhere, I glutted on daytime tv. And I discovered the Judge.

And she is the most awesome badass of all badasses. The way she whales into all the losers on her show, cutting through the bullshit, is something to behold. If only waste-of-life celebrities could be brought into her show! what joy! Bring on Paris Hilton ! Lindsay Lohan! One "You, ma'am, are an idiot" from the Judge would make me burst with happiness. Long live The Judge!

Posted by: figgy at April 30, 2009 6:29 PM

You know, as a man, I’ve always been reluctant to comment on the validity of a woman’s claim of domestic abuse. It’s just not a precinct I have any right to go stumbling into, and so I don’t. I don’t actually believe that Judge Judy is anti-woman, but I do think she’s in a position to mete out justice, at least a verbal justice, that no man really has the moral authority to administer. The fact that this is taking place on daytime TV, in front of a primarily female audience, is notable, I think.

We’re probably in a post-feminist age( whatever that might be), and Judge Judy’s no bullshit style, like Camille Paglia, seems well suited to the times.

Posted by: michael murray at April 30, 2009 6:29 PM

Figgy!!!

That's a spot on brilliant idea!!

You should run-- do not walk-- to some studio with that idea! Brilliant! Judge Judy serving as an arbitrator for disputes between Lohan and Samantha, Paris and Nickie, Tommy and Pam, or just about any of the dysfunctional wrecks in our celebrity pantheon would be utter gold!

You're brilliant!!

Posted by: michael murray at April 30, 2009 6:37 PM

Judge Judy is awesome. I also heard that she is the highest-paid woman on television (Oprah owns her own show and technically doesn't get paid to appear on it).

Posted by: Pajibill at April 30, 2009 7:50 PM

Oh, the asshole ex boyfriends get their asses ripped plenty on here. I watch from time to time because unlike almost any other daytime/reality TV show, you actually learn a thing or two about the law once in awhile, stuff you might someday be involved in -- traffic accidents, landlord-tenant disputes, roommate disputes, property disputes, that kind of thing. It could help someday to pay attention to who's considered at fault and why.

Judy's at her best when she takes a few moments from berating the fools in her court to explain nuances in the law, and what a judge can rule on and what a judge can't. She's at her worst when she automatically assumes she knows when someone is lying.

The amazing thing to me (as it is to elusive) is that the vast majority of people who appear on her show apparently never, EVER watch her show first, to see what they're getting into. If they did they'd know to dress properly, keep their fucking big mouths shut when they're not being addressed, and for Godtopus' sake bring all their documentation. Few of these cases seem won; most are lost.

I've seen her be very sensitive to cases too, remarkably so. A few years ago a student here at WVU sued the student newspaper for libel. One of the reporters had written about seeing this student smoking pot at a party. The student claimed he didn't smoke and sued. Both parties were certain they were right, and both presented themselves as respectable young men in court. This one took up two shows because they took the student's hair clippings for analysis and the tests came back negative for marijuana.

Judy was calm and patient throughout, and it was a fascinating thing to see.

Posted by: , (the commenter formerly known as bucdaddy) at April 30, 2009 7:56 PM

She's not anti-feminist. She's anti-bullshit.

Posted by: ceejeemcbeegee at April 30, 2009 8:07 PM

Second that.

Posted by: alphawhiskey at April 30, 2009 8:12 PM

Thirdees.

Got to love Judy.

Posted by: spielcat at April 30, 2009 8:46 PM

'Few of these cases seem won; most are lost.'

Such an awesome summation, Puddle-Buc. I actually blurted out 'yes', like there's another person in my apartment with whom I'm conversing. There's not. Unless we're talking about God. If that's the case, I'd like half of the rent money. Anyway...

If people are going to behave like deranged wombats, they should not offer themselves up to the exterminator. I don't really watch these shows of my own volition, but both of my sisters and my mother do, so trying to get a channel changed would just be a battle in the Slough of Despond. However, despite protestations, I sometimes get sucked in--usually when it involves me actively rooting for her to put the pain down on some horrifying tub of guts who shouldn't be let out of the house. I still find her pretty grating, but if I were in her position, I'm sure I would behave the same way.

If I have a complaint, it's that she seems to bully young children a lot, and interprets their flustered responses as an admission of *someone's* guilt. I used to be a piano teacher, and I admit, I coddled my students too much. Ten-year-olds aren't in love with Bach.

Even in those over-felicitous situations, little kids get spooked and frustrated very easily. One minute you're talking about dotted half note, the next is fifteen-minute crying jag.

Posted by: Jo 'Mama' Besser at April 30, 2009 11:30 PM

Sigh! Judge Judy may be okay by 2009 standards, but nothing will ever come close to the glory of Judge Wapner. I delighted in watching him tell people to go away and come back to his court when they could tell their stories in complete sentences. I loved the way he and Rusty the bailiff would share a look of frustration. Wapner created the model; all others are just imitators to the throne.

Posted by: PaddyDog at May 1, 2009 9:37 AM

Hey, PaddyDog, wasn't the theme music for "The People's Court" great? Also, what ever happened to Doug Llewellyn?

Posted by: Carolina Girl at May 1, 2009 12:53 PM

Judge Judy is one of my guilty pleasures. But I totally disagree that she's "anti-woman." Really, she's anti-idiot and anti-sense-of entitlement.

I've worked in a family court, and you just get a sense of people who have real issues and need the system to help them out, and others who want to use the system to get something that they have right to. I didn't have the power to ridicule and shame folks in this latter category as Judy does, but sometimes I wished I could.

As often as she blasts the idiots that come before her, I have also seen her be supportive and sympathetic to those who show a glimmer of intelligence and self determination.

Posted by: Nichofthyme at May 1, 2009 1:19 PM

Allow myself to delurk and say: this was brilliantly written. I never would have thought to analyze Judge Judy from a feminist standpoint.

Posted by: Alethena at May 2, 2009 11:29 AM

I watch all the court shows. Judge Judy is one of the most rudist judges and the most munipulating people I have ever seen. She talks about out burst. She needs to look in the mirror

Posted by: kelly at May 12, 2009 12:17 PM

I just like that doily she wears around her neck. And she screams nice, especially at people who have ENOUGH children already! Because she doesn't want to pay for anymore of them with her tax money. (Someone has to say it.)

Posted by: Taffy Doublewide at June 3, 2009 7:31 PM