How I Met Your Mother "Rallies" and We Ask for Your Go-To Hangover Cure
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How I Met Your Mother "Rallies" and We Ask for Your Go-To Hangover Cure

By Courtney Enlow | TV Reviews | February 25, 2014 | Comments ()


In “Rally,” last night’s latest episode of How I Met Your Mother and the first of the seven remaining all-new episodes in a row before we say goodbye and I cry until my eyeballs fall out, we saw something we’ve waited a year to see.

No, not the adorable school-aged versions of Ted and the Mother’s kids—Weekend at Barney’s! *island percussion solo!*

Yes, after all this time, almost exactly one year, Barney’s dreams—dreams a thousand times better than his wedding ever could be—came true. Except they didn’t really.

After the previous two episodes’ debauched night spent drinking himself into “truth serum” mode and then teaching two youths (BriTANicK!) how to live, Barney is completely passed out. Even Robin, who finally made it back to earth, using tried-and-true paternal methods, can’t get him up. But if there’s one thing that can get Barney Stinson up, it’s this.


But his time awake is brief, and with pictures looming, the clan must attempt to find the recipe to Barney’s famous hangover cure: The Stinson Hangover Fixer Elixir (it involves Funyuns and ginger). As the known ingredients include grease, Ted tries bacon for the first time after a lifetime thinking he’s allergic to it (just like Halloween candy and not saying “thank you”). There’s trepidation.

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Seeing Barney this hungover makes everyone vow to never again get that drunk. The best part of the episode, and there’s a lot of great in there, involves flash-forwards to the times they obviously break these vows. My favorite being Barney and Robin’s 2016 stay in Argentina.


The hearts of a thousand Barney-Robin-baby shippers were broken last night.

But the secret ingredient to the elixir is never found because, alas, it was a lie. Barney made it up to help his friends at their worst moments so they might rally. Thus, they lie to him, making up a successful “Weekend at Barney’s” playbook play, when, in reality, they canceled their wedding pictures and Barney got kicked in the balls.


But we’ll always have the (fabricated) memories.

This was a super fun episode, consistent for a super-fun season. And the next time I’ll be as drunk as Barney will probably be the series finale. Because it will hurt.

OK, go-to hangover cures. For me, it’s all about McDonald’s. Sausage biscuit, hashbrown and a large Coke. The sugar and carbonation are integral to your healing so don’t skimp with diet like you’re suddenly watching your figure after those six gin-and-gingers. More importantly, avoid hangovers in the first place by only drinking expensive wine, and by expensive I mean more than $11 a bottle. I’m all about the finer things in life.

Also, if you’re like me, you get drunk hiccups. The only cure? Say “Alec Baldwin.” This tried and true method dates back to medieval times (2006) and must be said out loud, for he must be summoned for his powers to take hold. He is a deeply flawed mess of a person, but dammit if he hasn’t cured all my hiccups and those of people around me eight years running.

Share yours in the comments. You bunch of lushes.

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Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not

  • mcat_05

    i need courtney to post about tonight's episode already, when my spirit was officially crushed as we found out the mother really is dead in the future. Now we know why the cast was crying so much reading the finale script

  • Green_Eggs_and_Hamster

    I also am a big believer in the restorative power of McDonald's. On the other hand, if I have an actual hangover going, there is no way I am waking up in time to get breakfast.
    I go with a Qtr pounder meal, Super Sized of course and a 6 piece Chicken Nugget with Honey. The Sugar from the Coke is absolutely integral, no diet crap. The grease from the burger, the salt from the fries, and finally the "superfood" that is honey combine to get you right as rain in half an hour or so. At least that is my experience. Your mileage may vary.

  • 1. Drink a metric fuck-ton of water before, during, and after your debauch.

    2. When you get up, get in the shower. Make it as hot as you possibly can, and then a tetch hotter. Stand there for about 5-10 minutes. DON'T fall asleep. After the 10 minutes has passed, whip the temperature control knob all the way around to 'ice cold' and take it like a man(or a woman, depending)

    3. Rare steak(or pork chops. Not rare ones, though), eggs over-easy, fried potatoes, grits, biscuits and gravy and a shit-ton of coffee.

    4. You're welcome.

  • emilya

    ron swanson, is that you?

  • katrus

    Hangover cures are becoming much more involved the older I get. Currently it's a medicine cocktail consisting of a caffeine pill, an anti-depressant, three ibuprofen, and a dosage of decongestant (drinking too much stuffs me up anymore). Then a meal of ramen cooked with two eggs, followed by a long nap. I will still feel like crap until the next day, but at least this will leave me not completely wrecked.

    As for the show itself, each episode during this second half of the season keeps making me cry a little. This time it was the kids running into their painfully hungover mother. They are on a roll, for sure.

  • Uriah_Creep

    by expensive I mean more than $11 a bottle. I’m all about the finer things in life.

    Oh, youse is such a fancy broad now, ain't chu?

  • competitivenonfiction

    Now that I've seen the episode, I'm officially shipping Robyn and Lily. Seriously, how did I not see their love before? I might even be inspired enough to write some seriously dirty fan fiction. Who's with me?

  • Sammers

    If my brain is working before passing out, I try to prevent the hangover with ibuprofen/Advil and a glass of milk. Unless I drank wine, then milk is not a good idea... If I forget to be preventative, then water, a banana or two, and ibuprofen usually works like a charm. I have also heard that drinking 7-Up is a miracle cure.

  • dorquemada

    Irn Bru and a scotch egg.

  • emilya

    i did a year abroad in northern england and i cannot tell you how many saturday mornings started with me drinking irn bru, eating wheetabix and watching red dwarf on someone else's computer!

  • Uriah_Creep

    Lister, Rimmer and the Cat? That's great stuff for the next morning!

  • emilya

    smoke me a kipper, i'll be back for breakfast!

  • loo shag brolley

    My only visit to England resulted in the WOIST hangover I've ever had. I stumbled blearily around Liverpool looking for any form of breakfast, but woke up so late, I seemed to miss every spot's breakfast by mere minutes. Finally I came upon a pub that served a delightful spread known as the "Full English Breakfast:" One fried egg, a rasher of bacon, two sausages, black & white puddings (don't ask, just eat, and with plenty of Brown Sauce), sauteed mushrooms, fried tomatoes, and beans and toast. I had that with a pint of something dark and strong and copious amounts of water and coffee. I was so wrecked, it took me an hour to finish, and when I did I was a new woman. I even managed to board a ferry to Dublin later that day and didn't even get seasick.

  • Stu Rat

    Your hangover cure was to go to IRELAND?

    I'm not even sure how to compliment that.

  • Erin S

    Sausage egg and cheese on a plain bagel and a large iced coffee. Where from? Literally could not matter less, mostly depends on how far I can drag myself. The best thing I can do though is wake up before 6 am and eat yogurt or applesauce and slowly drink some water. Once I fall back asleep with something in my stomach I can wake up for the day and not be pukey. Otherwise? Exorcist.

  • DeaconG

    When I drank, the only known hangover cure I knew of was MORE BEER.

    Also, "Alec Baldwin"? Isn't that like calling the Candyman?

  • Bert_McGurt

    Not a remedy, exactly, but I can tell you from experience that the "full plate" from Schwartz's in Montreal is a FABULOUS hangover prevention tool. One full pound of Montreal smoked meat, half a loaf of rye bread, a bottle of mustard and a giant pickle (cherry cola is optional, but recommended). Full twelve hours of drinking with no ill effects.

  • mairimba

    My hangover cure: Either a heavy meal before going to bed (my favorite is liver steak with ripe plantains on the side. If not an option then anything from Denny's) or for breakfast an omelette with EVERYTHING, toast with extra butter, a large coffee and at least two vitamin waters. McDonald's breakfast also works. With at least two or three hash browns.

  • Fabius_Maximus

    Water is the only thing that really works.

  • Buellie413

    Advil, a greasy cheese omelet, home fries, bacon, a cup of coffee, a gallon of water, and a large grapefruit juice.

  • axis2clusterB

    I prevent it from the outset. I drink vodka and water with Crystal Light or Mio flavoring squeezed in. The water negates the alcohol, because SCIENCE. Or something.

  • Cree83

    I'm just glad they finally showed a flash forward with Barney and Robin together, in the future, actually wearing wedding rings. They usually have them hide their hands and try to make it all ambiguous as to whether they're actually going to go through with it, but at this point, they had to get real, right? We know they're actually going to get married, right? It's going to happen, RIGHT?

  • If it doesn't, we riot.

  • Paddington

    Before I go to sleep, I drink a lot of gatorade and have some greasy carbs (burger or pizza).

  • Mrs. Julien

    I love Robin's dress. It must have been chosen before the Costume Department decided that they hated her.

  • Three_nineteen

    You woke up early enough to have breakfast at McDonald's? Quarter Pouder w/cheese extra value meal, supersized. If a disgusting hole-in-the-wall diner is accessible, switch that to the greasiest breakfast they have.

  • competitivenonfiction

    The only sure-fire cure for a hangover is a 3 am giant glass of orange juice (doesn`t have to be real juice). Must be drunk before you are actually hung-over BUT still at least too drunk to drive.If you actually get to the point of being hung over, you`re just fucked.

  • Jamie

    Greasy breakfast tacos & a big red. Chorizo & egg, carne guisada w/cheese or migas w/cheese. The greasier the better, until your stomach settles so you can start drinking again.

  • NateMan

    1. Lots of water between drinks and before bed, chasing a handful of ibuprofin.
    2. Sleep for as long as possible.
    3. REAL bacon from a butcher shop, cooked until just barely crispy. Gotta have some chew left to it.
    4. Over easy eggs cooked in the grease, soaked in hot sauce, atop of 2 pieces of lightly toasted white bread that are slathered in real butter and sprinkled with salt. I may have a salt addiction.
    5. Coffee followed by Revive VitaminWater (as many B vitamins as possible).
    6. Archer marathon.
    7. These days, copious amounts of pot. Smoking helps a hangover soooooooo much.

    Also, this episode was great, with several laugh out loud moments for both my wife and I. One of the best ones of the season.

  • Bert_McGurt

    UP-VOTE. Pot is a miracle worker on a hangover. Coffee and Gatorade are requisite company of course.

  • Elisabeth Forsythe

    Slamming a Coke + eating a small portion of clam chowder is my ultimate hangover cure and got me through my partying/waitressing years on Martha's Vineyard!

  • Samantha Klein

    Yeah, water and ibuprofin proactively is best, but if all else fails, it actually IS hair of the dog. So counter-intuitive, yet works like magic.

    Coke only works for a little while, or in truly egregious quantities.

    I tried the grease thing once, but since I was fencing a tournament at the time, I just ended up yakking. Der.

  • Anna von Beav

    Buttered everything bagel (extra butter), coffee, V8, water. Done.

  • Modernlove

    A massive bottle of red Gatorade, a can of coke, and Tastykakes (type of which being your choice, I'm partial to the chocolate cupcakes). Follow by sleeping until it's socially acceptable to drink again to drive away the last bits of hangover.

  • Buellie413

    I'm SO getting jelly Krimpets the next time I have crazy drinky plans.

  • Modernlove

    It's one part sugar, one part fat, one part essence of Philly. If I can't get a decent cheesesteak, I can get a goddamn Tastykake.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    Ooooh, I like the Alec Baldwin hiccup cure, and I'll have to try that for sure.

    My hangover relief generally involves being proactive with water and a vitamin before bed. And usually some ginger ale or seltzer in the morning. Sometimes eggs. Sometimes leftover pasta of some sort. That does not depend at all on how late I sleep.

  • el_mediocre

    Not picking on this because shit is a smart thing to do (and what I do myself, assuming I had time to prep), but couldn't one argue that water before bed is more of a "hangover prevention" method, rather than an actual cure?

  • Tom

    sure, but the next morning I don't give a fuck about the difference between prevention and cure. even if you have a surefire cure it's going to take a while to work and probably require me moving to get it. I'm too old for any of that :)

  • Sara_Tonin00

    Well, yeah, that's why I said "proactive." I suppose I could've tossed around the phrase hangover prophylactic, but I can't even type 'prophylactic' with a straight face.

    If I'm drinking at home, I also finish whatever was left in my glass when I went to bed the night before on my way to the bathroom.

  • Tom

    apparently I can't even read it with a straight face

  • el_mediocre

    I chuckled a bit, if that helps.

  • meaux_c_m

    Yes, and about 8 ounces is worth a pound of temples in my experience.

  • Tom

    If I'm smart enough to think of it at the time, drinking some water and taking advil before I go to sleep will make the morning a lot better.

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    ★★★ ★★★� ★★★ ★★�★★ ★★★I tried the grease thing once, but since I was fencing a tournament at the time, I just ended up yakking. Der.

  • TK

    Um, some people don't have to drink to have fun, Courtney. Maybe the best way to cure a hangover is to not get intoxicated in the first place.

    I kid, I kid. Drinking is the only way I know how to feel alive anymore. Hangover cure = grease. Bacon, eggs, pizza, Chinese food, sometimes all at once. Failing that, I'll just lick the floor of a rendering facility.

    Also, Bloody Marys.

  • Ian Fay

    Thanks, Dad.

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