Bruce Willis Hosts SNL. Shrug.
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Bruce Willis Hosts SNL. Shrug.

By Courtney Enlow | TV Reviews | October 13, 2013 | Comments ()


Sorry this is up a bit later than usual. My little brother got married last night, and I partied pretty hard. And by that I mean my unconsumed glasses of wine kept disappearing and I came home with a seriously worsened cold and hit the NyQuil pretty hard. But, other than that, it was a great time, and, frankly, if I could rally through sickness and disappearing alcohol to totally jam out at my brother’s wedding, you’d think anyone involved could have exerted the tiniest modicum of energy in the making of last night’s SNL.

The cold open was one of those classic examples of an idea that is funny only as a tweet, but SNL attempts to make it a full sketch, with the Gravity characters unable to reach Houston during the government shutdown. The most notable part of the sketch is that the Bullock character is inexplicably renamed “Janet Stone” instead of “Ryan Stone.”

The monologue was stilted at best, but does feature Willis going full Bruno if you’re into that kind of thing.

One of the best sketches of the night, and, remember, this is a low bar, is the 24-Hour Energy for Dating Actresses.

I included this Barber Shop sketch because if you don’t want to watch any of the other sketches, this is summarizes it quite nicely. Every other cast member is at least attempting high-energy fun, and Willis is just kind of…there. And I’m genuinely not sure if it’s any fault of his own. I cannot tell if it’s Willis’s lessening ability to do comedy, the writing or if it’s a case of Willis’s now notorious diva dick tendencies limiting what the show could do.

Not only was Willis a semi-awkward Robitussin dose injected into every sketch he in which he partook, but the writers couldn’t even bother to write original sketches, with a rerun of “E-Meth” (rerun commercials are a sign of a lax episode, to be certain) and two appearances by what now seem sure to be recurring characters that weren’t that funny the first time. One was Killam’s “glice” guy from the Justin Bieber episode last season (not including the re-do, it’s too annoying), and one was this, Bobby Moynihan’s “kitty keeyat” guy. Sure. Why not.

Per uszhe, Weekend Update was the highlight of the night. Cecily Strong continues to come into her own, and between her strength in the Update chair and her strength in sketches, she’s one of the show’s MVPs. I’d argue that the ladies in this iteration are some of the strongest performers in the show’s history. These ladies are killer.

New cast member Brooks Whelan popped in to talk about the armed forces tattoo cutoff and speaks volumes about my own decision to get a lower-back tattoo of a dragonfly at 18 (they weren’t called “tramp stamps” yet, I just didn’t know!)

The Beer Pong sketch was probably my personal favorite sketch of the night. I just like elaborate games. Design your ideal roller coaster!

However, there were a few moments of Willis seeming to actually enjoy himself and one of them was “Boy Dance Party.” Becks Bennett can shake that ass and Taran Killam can shake that sack, guys.

Katy Perry is a terrible live singer. “Walkin’ On Air” was very ’90s, and for the first time ever, I don’t mean that in a good way.

How Did It Go So Wrong? NBC's Thursday Night Comedy Lineup Is Worse Than It's Been In 30 Years | Charlie Hunnam Remembered He's Too Good for That Fifty Shades Crap and Dropped It Like the Stink Bomb It Is

Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not

  • e jerry powell

    Pail. Totally bucket.


  • Gunnut2600


  • kirbyjay

    Put Bruce in the weekend update chair and have him say " I'm Bruce Willis and you're not"
    same hubris as Chevy Chase.

  • wicked.whipser

    eddie murphy was awesome in the barber shop skit

  • John W


  • yocean

    How is that Katy Perry performance not a sketch about the skirt that defies physics and Robyn wannabe dancers decidedly dancing by themselves in a group? Her hotness do not justify that much cooky air-stairs.

  • **I AM** NotTheOne

    Points to Katy Perry for singing instead of lip-syncing. I don't imagine she is any worse than Britney or Rihanna live.

    Points off for the tired "sexy schoolgirl outfit". How do we make grown women stop dressing like little girls? Or why do men like this? (Discuss among yourselves)

    I like Cecily.

  • Ben

    As a guy, the sexy school girl thing is mainly a nostalgia thing.

  • **I AM** NotTheOne

    Perhaps nostalgia makes those ugly school uniforms look like that Britney Spears video.

  • kirbyjay

    or a pedophile thing

  • Pajiba_Pragmatist

    If she was actually singing, she has the strangest diaphragm on the face of the earth. Look when she goes to belt out the high note - her stomach looks EXACTLY the same as when she's not singing.

    It's possible she was singing and they just had her mic-ed for all she was worth, but she didn't seem to be really singing from her core.

  • Zettai Ryouiki Level B. Short skirt. High stockings. Thighs. I'm not proud.

  • **I AM** NotTheOne

    Fair enough.

  • apsutter

    I have really been loving Cecily and Seth on Weekend Update...they have been killing it. Anyone else think that Kenan's had a pretty good season so far as well? I loved his reverend on WU.

  • MissAmynae

    Maybe I can stop by every week...Let us pray! line of the night.

  • Wrestling Fan

    The episode wasn't terrible, just not great. Bruce, when he put his heart into it (like the centaur sketch), definitely brought some life to otherwise dumb skits.
    I blame the writing more than the host.

  • That Katy Perry song sounded like she was covering Crystal Waters or La Bouche. Definitely a 90's flashback like you said.

  • **I AM** NotTheOne

    This! Thank you. I thought I was the only one who heard that. And now I want to add some Crystal Waters to my playlist.

  • e jerry powell

    she's just like you and me..

  • **I AM** NotTheOne

    The fact that it wasn't already on my playlist is an egregious oversight on my part, for which I now have Ms. Perry to thank.

    See? I said something nice.

  • e jerry powell

    as she stands there, singing for money...

  • Sean

    I don't really understand why Willis was there in the first place. When was the last time anyone wanted to see Bruce Willis in ANYTHING? Mid-90s? Katy Perry? She has been terrible every other time she has been on, why expect anything different?

    The show itself...exactly as you said. A 90 minute shrug. Like no one cared in anyway. It wasn't horrible(although Willis mostly was). It was just...a 90 minute space filler. Except the news.

  • Ben

    I will never not want to see Bruce Willis in things. I don't care how far he falls, or how many awful die hard movies he makes.

  • Sean

    It isn't the Die Hard movies(although the last one was a disgrace). It is the 45 direct to the internet movies he makes every year. He should leave those to Cuba Gooding, or Nick Cage.

  • kirbyjay

    Die Hard 5. Shut it off after 20 minutes. Horribly boring, and I love Die Hards.

  • Thor

    The last time I wanted to see him in something was last year's Looper.

  • apsutter

    She is so awful and I keep waiting for her 15 minutes to be up and go the fuck away. This ep recorded on my dvr and during he performance of "Roar" there was literally like 20 different sound/video glitches which fit in perfectly with her awfulness

  • kushiro -

    Did you want to see him in it, or would you have liked it even if someone else played his part?

  • Sean

    Actually a great point. Couldn't any 50-60 yr old actor have done just as good a job?

  • Thor

    I wanted him because I was interested in how JGL was going to do a Bruce Willis impression.

  • kushiro -

    That's a pretty good reason.

    Now imagine they cast Tilda Swinton instead.

  • Sean

    Wow. I forgot about that. And I loved that movie.

  • DGM

    I love Moynihan's "Kitty-CYAT" guy. Y'all just a hater is what you is.

  • Melissa

    I'm pretty sure I have totally done the lion king thing with at least one of my cats, so there's that.

  • Thor


  • Isn't "terrible live singer" the same thing as "terrible singer"? I mean, being a good singer who's terrible live is like being a guy who can turn invisible but only when no one is looking.

  • e jerry powell

    I said the same thing about Sade on SNL. I thought she was actually good until she sang "Is It a Crime?" on live TV. I felt so disillusioned, and I haven't been able to listen to her since. TWENTY-SEVEN YEARS, TEN MONTHS.

  • Zen

    Personally, I take it that you've seen Mystery Men. To that I say, can you dig it?

  • Totally true. I can see why people like her "voice" on the radio but it's clearly manufactured.

  • Thor

    I take if you've never watched Misfits.

  • lowercase_ryan

    Simon 4 EVA!!

  • Batesian

    Save me, Barry!

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