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Are You Soaking Your Tampons in Vodka Again?

By Dustin Rowles | Posted Under TV Reviews | Comments (14)



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Survivor: The “Heroes vs. Villains” has been one of the best cycles of “Survivor” in its decade-long history, but it’s also been one of the most frustrating. It’s clear at this point that, whether we want to or not, we have to acknowledge Russell’s superiority over the game. I don’t get it. I don’t understand why people continue to trust him. I understand that none of this season’s players were actually able to see last season (where Russell dominated the game), but you’d think that, by now, a few more alarm bells would go off. And yet, that little rat bastard has been able to manipulate the game to suit his strategy from the beginning (save for Parvati’s ownership last week).

It’s frustrating because Russell has managed, in his alliance with Parvati, to eliminate some of the best — and most popular — players in the game’s history, starting with Boston Rob and culminating last night in the ouster of Amanda, who heretofore had spent more time in the game than any other player in “Survivor” history (Parvati will take that title next week).

Last week’s immunity idol heavy Tribal Council was one of the best in recent memory (and one of the rare surprises the show’s editors didn’t spoil) and though they couldn’t top it in last night, the show’s editors did a magnificent job not giving it away. But in the end, for reasons that don’t make a lot of sense to me, Candice flipped on the Heroes because Russell had an idol. I’d like to think it was a dumb move, but so far, siding with Russell has advanced everyone who has done so up to this point. The few remaining heroes are in trouble. Without Amanda, I’m not sure I care. I think, at this point, Rupert is the only person in the game left to care about.

Of course, scenes from next week reveal that the Villains’ tribe may finally be falling apart. But then again, we’ve seen similar upcoming scenes before. And Russell is still there.

Will somebody please boot that fucker off the island?

The Office: I have to admit that, while “The Office” hasn’t been on its game since Jim and Pam’s wedding, last night’s episode was one of the better ones this season. Dwight attempted to outmaneuver Daryl in pushing Kelly through the Executive Program for minorities (only to regret it later), but the A plot last night revolved around Michael’s attempts to kiss the nightclub owner, despite having his advances rebuffed over and over and over again. The level of discomfort on last night’s show was as high as it’s been since Michael botched that scholarship program for high schoolers and couldn’t follow through on his promise to pay their college tuition (that episode was brutal).

I honestly do appreciate the comedy of discomfort, but don’t you kind of wish that just once … just once … Michael Scott could win the day without making the rest of us feel so unbelievably uncomfortable. Bravo for his persistence, and double bravo for Pam’s deliciously lame puns last night.

30 Rock: “30 Rock,” of late, has become a show propelled by three or four outstanding one-liners in otherwise mediocre episodes. Last night was no exception; each of the three subplots fell kind of flat. Jenna fell in love with a drag-queen version of herself (Will Forte), a subplot that was almost completely devoid of laughs (it was more dumb than creepy). The subplot involving Grizz, and his attempts to make Dot Com his best man over Tracy (not realizing that Dot Com was in love with Grizz’s finance, Feyonce) was pretty funny (the show doesn’t utilize Grizz and Dot Com enough), but the one involving Jack and that goddamn peacock was atrocious.

Fortunately, the show did deliver two excellent one liners. When it was suggested that Jack might have to stay in a haunted house over night, Liz cracked, “You better hope everyone else there is black guys and sluts.” And later in the episode, Liz questioned Jenna’s unusual level of happiness, asking: “Why are you so happy and nice? Are you soaking your tampons in vodka again?”

Those two lines alone were worth 22 minutes of my life.

Community: “Community,” as it has since it found its legs around episode three, was on its game last night, tossing Pierce from the group after he pantsed Shirley, realizing then that Pierce was the group’s lightning rod, who absorbed all the group’s nastiness. Without him, their meanness bounced around at each other. Meanwhile, Jeff and Brita had to deal with a few students who insisted on childishly torturing them, a subplot that satirized, in a way, Internet trolls. It started out hilarious but kind of lost steam in the “retard-off” (for lack of a better word) in the end. But, as usual, the highlights were Troy and Abed, and the awesome combination of The Bucket List and an ’80s college comedy. They killed.

The one caveat, however, is that “Community” seems to be basing a lot of their premises on movie genres, which is great and a source for a lot of great material. For a while. “Pysch” used to do this, too, but once they exhausted all of the genres, the show careened off the tracks. Let’s hope the same doesn’t happen to “Community.”









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Comments

30 Rock is absolutely worth the time to get a few good one-liners. I have the last 4 episodes of The Office gathering dust in my DVR listings since I realized I don't really care for it anymore. Community is outstanding and Troy is easily my favorite current TV character. He nails every single moment and line given to him, and his chemistry with Abed is off the charts.

Posted by: Kballs at April 30, 2010 10:39 AM

I think they need to find a way to get Troy to interact with an animal every week. His stuff with the goat and Annie's Boobs was just awesome.
And I loved the pantsing bit. Especially Abed's line about how it'd be better if Troy had big red heart boxers. And then when he got pantsed he was wearing them.

Posted by: Optimus Rhyme at April 30, 2010 10:44 AM

What, no Parks and Recreations? The best thing in on TV

Posted by: Ari at April 30, 2010 10:46 AM

No love for "Parks & Rec", Dustin? Funniest show on Thursday night now. It started a bit rough but toward the end of season 1 Leslie Knope (Amy Poehler) moved from a clueless Michael Scott clone into someone with intelligence. She can be a bit naive and do-gooder, but she has a healthy cynicism and doesn't allow her employees to walk all over her. She's one of the more well rounded characters on TV. Especially since it was randomly revealed that she is a bit of a hoarder. Add in the Arrested Development style of "call back" jokes and Parks & Rec is immensely enjoyable week after week.

And the supporting case is incredible. Give it another chance if you bailed early. It destroys The Office and 30 Rock week after week. And you are DEAD ON your critique of 30 Rock. Although last week's episode with Liz doing the singles activities was the funniest of the season.

Posted by: TylerDFC at April 30, 2010 10:48 AM

I think my faith in the Office's ability to change would be restored if Michael finally sticks this relationship out. Just for ONCE let the man be in a functional relationship. It's just not fucking possible for a human being to go so long through so many disasters without learning a goddamn thing. So just PLEASE let this work out. Let the man be happy without turning into a child.

Posted by: figgy at April 30, 2010 11:41 AM

Figgy, you haven't met my friend Cathy. It's perfectly believable.

Posted by: Whorish Mouth at April 30, 2010 11:55 AM

I'm loving Community more and more, and last night's episode was fantastic. Did anyone catch the preview for next week's ep? If they reference Gotcha! I'll forever love this show. By far my favorite Anthony Edwards/Linda Fiorentino collaboration.

Posted by: logar at April 30, 2010 12:17 PM

I really liked Community until the last ten minutes which normally happens. But Abed and Troy are pretty much my favorite duo on tv. Then I watched Parks and Rec (my first full episode of that) and that had it's moments, it was alright. I probably won't watch it full time. But I gotta say, Paul Schneider has great range (he plays that Mark guy AND had that awesome Scottish accent in Bright Star). Stuck around for 30 Rock and the Jenna in drag thing was just effin creepy. Kenneth is cute though.

After pepping myself up watching that crazy Wendy Williams, I attempted to watch a Masterpiece Theatre Mystery which fell flat. Also learned about antiques on Antiques Roadshow and caught a couple acts of the World Magic Awards (yes those really do exist and no it never stopped being funny watching the camera pan to exactly zero famous people in the crowd) and finally called it quits when I got incensed by a cable access channel's airing of some anti-gun control rally here in Pennsyltucky. Republicans.

What can I say, I had control of the fuzzy tv in the common room and I was procrastinating.

Posted by: grace b at April 30, 2010 12:25 PM

I disagree on 30 Rock. I think this is a very funny season and stronger than the one with Salma Hayek. Maybe it's just wearing on your, but Tina Fey is a genius clown and utilizing her show the way you hate how Will Ferrell makes movies. The difference is taht Ferrell is like a live action version of Aqua Teen Hunger Force and Tina Fey is like a modern version of Charlie Chaplin, but it's not just her that gets to be the funny one. Everyone gets to be Chaplin on her show. I, for one, love when the clowns get the big budgets.

And though I missed last night's shows because high winds BLEW THE DISH OFF MY ROOF, these have been Parks and Community stellar seasons.

I watch the Office when I am waiting for a basketball game. Barring that, I'll take the time waster after reruns of Seinfeld I'm watching for the 5th time and Extreme Makeover Home Edition- which is to say, rarely.

Posted by: Jackseppelin at April 30, 2010 12:41 PM

I thought last night's 30 Rock was replete with 1-liners. I enjoyed it more than I have in a long time, especially Tracy's and Pete's stuff.

"I'm Pete Hornberger, but you can call me 'Dallas'."

"Whoa, you'd better watch your mouth before I show you the back of my hand!"
written on hand: PLEASE BE NICE TO ME

"You think that's impressive? Watch me stand on one foot! agh... I could do it yesterday..."

Posted by: Ling at April 30, 2010 12:45 PM

And, Jack's 5 stages of grief... in slow motion

Posted by: Ling at April 30, 2010 6:59 PM

I like Russell! I wouldn't trust him for a second, but in terms of playing the Survivor game, he is simply genius - he can read people and sway them any way he wants, so far. If he wasn't already rich, I would suggest that he start selling Amway.

Posted by: MiaMouse at April 30, 2010 7:10 PM

Community is really hitting it's stride. The last 2 episodes have been epic and next week looks like more of the same. YAY!

They made a Fletch 2 joke and the fact that Jeff nailed pukass's franken mom, twice, made my night. When Jeff and Britta figure out the only way to get back at the little jerk is to sleep with his mom, their look of complete joy and the behind the back five was hilarious.

Posted by: Mebe at May 1, 2010 3:12 PM

30 Rock, it still makes me want to yell Baba Booey at Walter Kronkite's funeral.

Posted by: Stacy D at May 1, 2010 10:36 PM