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10 Things We Learned From This Week's Frankly Unbelievable Episode Of "American Horror Story: Asylum"

By Joanna Robinson | TV Reviews | November 9, 2012 | Comments ()


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I'm Beginning To Suspect Ryan Murphy Isn't A Fan Of Brown Bunny: I know this came at the end of the episode and I should save the best for last. But there were, le sigh, zero atrocities visited upon Adam Levine this week. So this...uh...whatever it is... that Dr. Arden did to Shelley will have to do. Don't look so glum, Shelley girl, the good Doctor implied that you might be immortal now. I'm sure the boils will clear up...eventually.
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Wait...Who's The Bad Guy Again? As if being a monster-maker and a prostitute-abuser weren't enough. This dude's a Nazi. So...I'm not supposed to like him? Is that the takeaway message here?
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Mad Props To The Casting Dept.: Did you do a double take during the young Dr. Arden/Hans Gruber sceness? (A-yup, Hans Gruber?)
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That right there is James Cromwell's son John. It was Cromwell The Elder's idea to cast him. Man, every venerable actor should come with their own spawn/doppelyounger.
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P.S. Whatever is going on with Arden/Gruber, this motherf*cker right here is in cahoots.
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Let's Address The German Elephant In The Room, Shall We?: So...Anne Frank, hunh? Were you offended? Many were. I wasn't really bothered. I assumed Murphy was doing an Anastasia thing. It worked for me. Do I believe her? No. Does it much matter? I don't think so.
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Ryan Murphy claims he wrote the part of Anne Frank especially for Franka Potente. I love her. Perfect choice. Also, I hope the below statement is true.
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When In Doubt, Employ The Shaggy Defense: Kit went from righteous innocence to prostrate repentance in the span of one episode. What happened to Dr. Thredson believing that Kit wasn't Bloody Face? Did I dream this particular plot hole?
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I, For One, Am Looking Forward To Lana's Briarcliff Bakery Exposé: Because this sh*t is most assuredly not sanitary.
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Grace NoLastName Took An Axe And Gave Her Step-Mother Forty Wacks, And When She Saw What She Had Done, She Gave Her Father Forty-One: I guess I have to let go of my Bloody Face theory now...I guess.
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Something Terrible Is Going To Have To Happen To Dr. Thredson: Don't make rescue promises to our heroine, Doc, unless you have a serious death wish.
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As Much As You Love Sister Jude, Do Not Forget That She Threatened To Neuter Our Favorite Puppies: Bad Sister Jude. Stole a biscuit.
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Ryan Murphy In A Nutshell: What an appalling, ridiculous, uncomfortable, alarmingly great scene. This (by all reports) realistic depiction of aversion/conversion therapy was equal measures fascinating and horrifying. I learned something. I felt for the fabtastic actors. (Both, incidentally, openly gay performers.) But there were moments that were so patently absurd, they took me right out of it. Ryan Murphy always flies too close to the sun, but it's usually enjoyable to watch the wax melt.
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Comments Are Welcome, Douches Are Not


  • Onomatopeon

    How tall is James Cromwell's son? 6'12"?

  • Anna von Beav

    I don't think Ryan Murphy was so much doing an Anastasia thing, as that was a thing that actually happened. Weren't there a whole bunch of women in that general time period that came out of the woodwork claiming to be Anne Frank? Much like the Anastasia thing?

  • Ramsey Mekdaschi

    They used Josef Mengele as the character for the doctor. I thought the episode was pretty good.

  • Dear American Horror Story:

    I love you. I do. Every ridiculous, over the top, offensive, hilarious, cringe-inducing moment is my favorite part of the week. So just do this one little thing for me.

    Do not let Lana be a post-traumatic lesbian.

    Please?

  • Uriah_Creep

    All I know is that if I have to listen to "Dominique" one more time, I cannot be held responsible for my subsequent actions.

  • Sydney

    Nice plagiarism, Joanna!

    Here is the original review (which went up earlier) which features that exact screen grab of the yoing Dr. Arden - complete with Price Peterson's kudos to the casting director and with the photo caption STILL ATTACHED: http://www.tv.com/news/america...

    Not even a hat tip or reference to the writer you stole from?

  • BiblioGlow

    Just read the other review. Other than the fact that they are both about the same episode, I found zero similarities (other than the photo you pointed out, which Joanna follows with actual info about the casting. Also, seriously? The photo recap style is not 'his'. That's like saying Steinbeck was a plagiarist because he used Hemingway's style of writing in paragraphs.).
    It seems like a pretty huge jump to think that anything was stolen, and an even bigger jump to then decide that it's a good idea to accuse her of doing so in the most annoying and purposely insulting way possible. It's just plain assy, however, to follow her downright graceful reply by calling the review a 'copy and paste job' when it very clearly isn't.

    Conclusion: You are a troll. Simmer down.

  • Sydney

    In her reply above Joanna says herself that she uses (i.e. copies and pastes) the images from other sources.

  • JoannaRobinson

    Whelp I found the photo in question on Tumblr which is where all these here gifs and images come from so I'm not sure if your use of plagiarism is accurate but I will whole-heartedly agree that Price is a fantastic and fun writer. I used to read his Vampire Diaries recaps religiously.

  • Sydney

    His photo-recap style is pretty easy to spot, especially if you are already familiar with his reviews, and then the exact same casting director reference? And calling people 'whelp'?

  • Jezzer

    She wasn't calling you a "whelp." Using it to precede a sentence is country folk talk for "well." Less stick in ass, more lurking please.

  • Sydney

    What's with the personal attack? If I point out a copy and paste job of someone's work I have a stick up my ass and I better shut up?

    One of the things I like about this site is that people can usually debate things without being nasty.

  • Jezzer

    No, you have a stick in your ass because she explained where she got the picture and why she didn't credit the original source and you STILL Would. Not. Let. It. Go.

    And since you already considered "whelp" a personal attack, I decided to go the unambiguous route. Your air of wounded innocence would be a lot more believable if you hadn't fired the first shot with, "Nice plagiarism, Joanna!"

  • Sydney

    Using a person's name is not a personal attack. And using other people's images and gifs without a reference is plagiarism, regarldless of the reason the reference is omitted.

  • Jezzer

    Oh, dear. I hope the Gif Police don't get involved!

  • Groundloop

    The other thing we learned from the Bakery Liaison scene is that women in 1964 were more easily satisfied sexually. Even allowing for the circumstances, Kit got away with coital murder.

  • Am I completely missing the part where the Anne Frank arc should offend me? Maybe someone could 'splain?

  • Sirilicious

    I agree. Even if she wasn't pulling an Anastasia, but the real thing, this is ok by me. I have great respect for Anne Frank. AHS shows fictional stories, without any disrespect (sofar). I think the only reason to find fault, is because there are so many ludicrous storylines, you don't want a serious examination of the WHAT IF Anne Frank was still alive to be explored in the same program.

  • Slash

    Eh, I wasn't offended by the Anne Frank thing (but then, I'm not Jewish, so maybe my opinion is irrelevant here). And I can't see the Anne Frank storyline ending well (for her). I want it to, but I don't think it will. She'll end up dead or more likely, just mutilated like poor Shelly. Since the priest is in on it too, ain't nobody getting out of there unscathed. Including poor Lana Banana. I continue to be appalled by Sister Spanksalot. I mean, Jessica Lange is killing it, of course, but still ... she creeps me the fuck out. And I'm not Catholic.

    RE the aversion therapy: It bothers me more to see the shock "therapy" scenes. You know that shit really happened, too.

    I don't think Kit is actually guilty. It's kinda well known that up until very recently (and maybe still, I'm not sure on that), if you weren't actually insane going into the loony bin, you'd surely be insane once you'd been there awhile. Even if Murphy's exaggerating the conditions for effect, I don't think he's exaggerating them by much, esp. for facilities for the "criminally insane." Can you imagine how terribly those people were treated in the '60s? And how many not actually criminal people were sent there?

  • Husband turned to me and said, "Anne Frank? Are they actively TRYING to piss people off?" Felt that way to me, too.

  • Guest

    "So…Anne Frank, hunh? We’re you offended?"?

  • Care

    Well... We are you?

  • Skyler Durden is not logged in

    I was SHOCKED by how much that dude looked like James Cromwell. Now that I know that they literally share the same DNA, I don't know whether to feel impressed or let down. I'm so confused right now.

  • lowercase_ryan

    I was wondering when Thredson had his epiphany and changed his mind about Kit too. I kind of think I missed something.

    While Thredson's aversion therapy was horrible and uncomfortable, it was MUCH better than what I thought was going to happen. Like, Doctor D in Patient V type therapy.

  • lillie

    I wasn't offended by the Anne Frank storyline. I'm not sure if she IS Anne or not, but I hope Franka Potente stays on the show. I was much more disturbed by that horrible image of Shelley at the end which was burned into my brain right before I went to sleep. Gah.

  • F'mal DeHyde

    Really? It was so melodramatic with the super quick close-up to her face and her croaked "K I L L M E". It reminded me of the original "The Fly" when David Hedison is stuck on the spider web at the end.

  • ClaireB

    Yeah..i don't need to watch it. This is enough.

  • Bert_McGurt

    I thought the Shaggy defense was to blame it on the old man pretending to be a ghost while jumping into the arms of your terrified bipedal Great Dane?

  • Whatever is going on with Arden/Gruber

    THIS is going on with Arden/Gruber:

    http://www.ahrp.org/cms/conten...

    Which makes me NOT offended by the Anne Frank character. [whether she's Anne or not, clearly the lady had been in a Concentration Camp] I have a feeling Anne would have approved of AHS exposing the Nazi Swine. [here and in Germany]

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