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Why The MPAA Can Suck It: The Trailer For Bully, A Film That Kids Should See, But Can't (UPDATED)

By TK | Posted Under Trailers | Comments (58)

bully.jpg

Update: The MPAA held it’s hearing with Weinstein today, and upheld its decision to reduce the rating to PG-13. Bully will be rated R, stating that the MPAA, “has the responsibility…to acknowledge and represent the strong feedback from parents throughout the country who want to be informed about content in movies, including language.” The decision to reject Weinstein’s appeal was upheld by a single vote.
(via The Daily What)

Ah, the Motion Picture Association Of America. The most puritanical, arrogant, misguided, obsolete group of stuffy bastards you’re likely to see outside of the Virginia House of Delegates.

Here’s the trailer for the documentary Bully, directed by Lee Hirsch (Amandla!). It deals with the very real bullying crisis that plagues American children, and examines that crisis, it’s causes, and what can be done to stop it. A snippet from the synopsis:

The Bully Project is the first feature documentary film to show how we’ve all been affected by bullying, whether we’ve been victims, perpetrators or stood silent witness. The world we inhabit as adults begins on the playground. The Bully Project opens on the first day of school. For the more than 5 million kids who’ll be bullied this year in the United States, it’s a day filled with more anxiety and foreboding than excitement.

Whatever your thoughts may be on the subject, the consequences are quite real. I can speak from limited experience — being the new kid with the darker skin and the funny accent when we moved to the U.S. was, unsurprisingly, not always a pleasant experience. I got picked on, I got beat up, but I eventually got out. Some kids don’t.

Some kids kill themselves. The statistics are harrowing.

I don’t know how good Hirsch’s film will be, but I loved the hell out of Amandla!, his documentary about music, revolution and struggle during the Apartheid regime, so Hirsch is a good guy in my book.

Here’s the trailer for Bully:

Looks impressive, if not interesting, eh? Of course, in their infinite goddamn wisdom, the MPAA is giving the film an R rating — for language. Despite the fact that it’s a documentary about kids, and frankly, the language is how kids talk. And despite the very real fact that it’s an important subject that kids, be they the bullied or the bullies, should be made aware of.

Harvey Weinstein is, not surprisingly, contesting the decision — and will in fact appear at the hearing with Alex Libby, one of the subjects of the film. Weinstein went on to say:

I have great respect for the work Chairman Joan Graves and the rest of the MPAA governing body do. I have been compelled by the filmmakers and the children to fight for an exception so we can change this R rating brought on by some bad language.

Is the move a self-aggrandizing, publicity-hounding stunt? Perhaps. The Weinsteins have done the same in the past for other films. But that hardly makes the issue any less infuriating. Here’s Lee Hirsch’s statement on the issue:

I made BULLY for kids to see - the bullies as well as the bullied. We have to change hearts and minds in order to stop this epidemic, which has scarred countless lives and driven many children to suicide. To capture the stark reality of bullying, we had to capture the way kids act and speak in their everyday lives - and the fact is that kids use profanity. It is heartbreaking that the MPAA, in adhering to a strict limit on certain words, would end up keeping this film from those who need to see it most. No one could make this case more powerfully than Alex Libby, and I am so proud and honored that he is stepping forward to make a personal appeal.









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Comments

Well, they're only KIDS who are killing themselves. Why would you want to show a message to children that covers all the bases, not just being the victim but everything?

I mean, sure they might LEARN from this. They might take away some hope that it gets better, or recognise something in the bullies on screen they haven't seen in themselves.

Shit, they might, if nothing else, bullies, victims, and standers by all, they might actually just ask questions about what is or has been going on with them which might lead to their changing their behaviour.

But they're only KIDS killing themselves, so who gives a shit? It's not as if you bleep swear words if you're THAT concerned so like...ya know...

Posted by: Nadine at February 23, 2012 11:14 AM

I don't think too many kids would go see a documentary anyway unless their parents drag them to it (which they should). So I doubt that the rating would have much of an effect either way.

Posted by: Todd at February 23, 2012 11:14 AM

No, that's not really true. My daughter and her friends have seen lots of documentaries, and while I don't want to paint them as some sort of precocious superkids (they're not, they're pretty normal), if the subject matter speaks to them, they'll see it. And bullying will DEFINITELY speak to them. They're not only interested in crap like Transformers...they have preferences, too, often well beyond what adults expect.

Posted by: Wednesday at February 23, 2012 11:30 AM

Actually, it is called the Virginia House of Delegates, to be correct.

Just sayin'

Posted by: AKATHEALIAS at February 23, 2012 11:35 AM

Let's put it this way - if it stays an "R" rating, there is zero chance of a field trip to go see it. PG-13 at least puts the option out there for junior high & h.s. trips/classroom viewings.

Posted by: Sara Tonin at February 23, 2012 11:41 AM

The R rating would probably also preclude it from being shown in schools as part of an anti-bullying curriculum. This is totally a special assembly film if ever there was one. Also this made me cry a little. Poor kids.

Posted by: JenVegas at February 23, 2012 11:45 AM

Funny thing. It used to be if the would "fuck" was ever uttered even once your movie got slapped with an "R" You could show blood and guts. You could show titties. But heaven help you if someone said that dreaded four letter word. Then "fuck" began to sneak into PG movies every now and again. Hey every other bad word already had a foothold, why not? Then they came up with the PG-13 rating as a sort of buffer and suddenly PG became the new G and G became the banality kiss of death for any movie that wasn't Disney. "Fuck" and other such words have been sneaking under the radar little by little. I have seen plenty of movies rated less than "R" have foul language, and usually nobody gives a rat's ass about it until some self-righteous parent raises a fuss that some such movie ruined their perfect snowflake.

Kids use "filthy" language. We all know this. We all did it to some extent or another. More so when adult aren't around. Partially because they know they can get away with when they otherwise would be reprimanded and partially because they want to experiment with it in their own way. Parents always ask the world stupidest question when they catch their angels spout off such things by asking "Where did you learn such words?" Spare us. You know damn well where they learned it. This is just another tired attempt of some people feeling the rest of the world needs to conform to their unrealistic morals by insulating their kids rather than taking time exploring the realities of the world with their kids and helping them understand the best way to deal with it. This rating nonsense is part of the whole "please think of the children" mantra in which peole think that if they ban "bad' words from media that they can magically prevent the corruption of kids everywhere.

This documentary wasn't just a work of fiction with punched up salty language added for effect. This is real. Sorry if reality hurts your ears, but it's there all the same. And the language being used is part of the fabric of the films' subject matter. Sometimes words are the bullies' first and most powerful weapons- especially because unlike physical violence it goes largely unnoticed and unpunished apart from the victims being told to "just ignore it" and the like. The world can be a very mean and nasty place. I can assure you blue language is often the least of your concerns. The world will not kowtow to your whims, it will not protect your children and it can very well destroy those who cannot look out for themselves. By this movie rating logic, bullies that use foul language shouldn't be heard. It would be like editing out footage from a documentary on the Holocaust because the images are too disturbing. By taking out something as important as the language you risk making the subject matter appearing less harmful than it actually is and there risk affecting the seriousness of the the reaction.

You can try to ban words, ban lyrics, ban images and even attempt to ban outlets. But you cannot ban reality. Besides, I would think people would far more concerned with the intentions behind the words rather than the words themselves. Maybe if some parents realized the kind of language being used and the hurtful way kids wield it, they might take the subject matter far more seriously.

Posted by: bleujayone at February 23, 2012 11:45 AM

As the mother of two toddler boys who will be entering grade school in a few years, bullying scares the holy living hell out of me. Both sides of the issue-being bullied or being the bully. I will be seeing this if for nothing other than a little more enlightenment on the subject. I'd be interested to see some figures on bullying trends in public vs. parochial schools as we're conducting our due dilligence on schools now.

Posted by: Helcat at February 23, 2012 11:57 AM

My kid has seen R-rated movies as part of her high school curriculum. Just a few weeks ago she watched Amistad. I had to sign a permission form, but that's all. I know it's not the only R movie she's seen in school.

Posted by: Wednesday at February 23, 2012 12:06 PM

Besides, I would think people would far more concerned with the intentions behind the words rather than the words themselves.


Oh, you are absolutely slaying me over here! That's the whole fucking problem. Some people don't understand the first thing about nuance. They think "fuck" is a bad word, period.

"Hey, your child could learn something by watching this."

"But, but, but, it has dirty words!!!"

Posted by: pissant at February 23, 2012 12:07 PM

Are you all talking about what you remember from your own childhood, or what you know to be happening now?

I don't think my kid's school district is especially liberal (I live in a conservative metro Atlanta suburb -- the district where the elementary school kids had the slave-math lesson that caused such a stir a month or so ago), but language and difficult subject matter really isn't as taboo as it would have been in my school years. *I* complained about a substitute teacher using "faggot" in an offensive statement made to students during instructional time, but rarely do I hear of the kids getting busted for language or parents clutching the pearls regarding profanity.

Posted by: Wednesday at February 23, 2012 12:28 PM

This is stupid. They can edit or blur the offending words out of the film without really altering the words (or our obvious knowledge of the words) being spoken in the film. This is pure publicity stunt.

Posted by: valerie at February 23, 2012 12:47 PM

@bluejayone: Right on and wholeheartedly agree.

This is exactly the type of movie / information that children *need* to see.

I was one of the bullied all through elementary and into junior high. Red hair, freckles, horrible buck teeth, really poor and fairly bookish... I ran into and out of school most days. Dad even purchased a heavy bag for me and hung it from the living room celing beam in hopes I'd learn to become an accomplished boxer. That didn't happen and I did eventually turn to experimenting with things to help ease the anxiety. Then I became one of the high school 'party ditch organizers' and gained the cool cred. Funny aside, I (somehow) kept up the grades throughout, ended up at alt high school and graduated nearly a year early. Things aren't hearts and flowers (at most levels: health, finance, romance) still at 45, but I'm doing alright and take every chance I get with my friends kids to tell them to believe in themselves and stay strong. I never did have kids. Just couldn't do it.

Posted by: Ms MoMo at February 23, 2012 1:11 PM

Publicity stunt or no, keeping the movie from the intended audience is not helping the issue. The movie itself may bring enlightenment where a lecture on rights and wrongs from adult authority figures won't. And hey, the publicity stunt worked. I'd never heard about it at all, and now I have and will seek it out in the future.

Posted by: JAJenks at February 23, 2012 1:15 PM

Yeah, can't they just go BEEP BEEP BEEP over all the "naughty" words? Kids who are already familiar with the naughty words (aka all of them) will still get what's being said, while the pristine ears of the MPAA will not be sullied.

I had a pretty genteel lower-middle class upbringing, and I was still cussing like a sailor by the time I was 11.

Posted by: MM at February 23, 2012 1:34 PM

Helcat, you are quite right to be concerned. As Ms. MoMo illustrates, you may never quite get over it; I certainly didn't. I went to parochial school and was bullied there, so I don't think one place is necessarily safer than another. If the child in question happens to have parents who are large school donors, that child very likely will not be disciplined.

But at least you're on the right track - I can tell you, kids with involved parents who stress treating their peers with respect no matter what, those kids likely don't end up bullies. In terms of investigating schools, I would put the question to the administration: What is their policy? How do they spot bullying? How do they respond once identified? Any school that doesn't have a clear policy and can't give you examples of how they've identified and responded aren't prepared for the situation and are likely to sweep it under the rug if it comes to light - in short, no place for your or any child.

Also, shout out to Blue Jay one.

Posted by: Miss Laaw-yuhr at February 23, 2012 1:44 PM

Every time a kid in the movie says "Fuck" just have somebody fart. Then it can be rated G.

Posted by: , at February 23, 2012 1:59 PM

For some reason or another, I didn't have to deal with bullies much in school. The only real problem was a couple of assholes in eighth grade, but they weren't really bullies, just dicks.

But watching this scares the hell out of me because my oldest is in middle school now, and he's a skinny, smart kid. My heart tenses up even thinking about the kind of things happening to him that are portrayed in the preview. I actually had a conversation with him about bullying the other day, and he said he never has any problems or even been witness to problems, which makes me feel better.

Posted by: chad at February 23, 2012 2:11 PM

*Yawns* B-O-R-I-N-G. Seriously, is anyone even the least bit shocked by the fact that the hideously ugly kid with the glasses is getting picked on and getting the shit beaten out of him? If his parents got plastic surgery for him to not make him a total uggo and he actually got some exercise and God forbid maybe even lifted some weights and got into semi-decent shape no one would pick on his uggo ass.

But of course we now live in the days of helicoptor parenting and obviously having the kid exercise would just make a ittle sissy so tired he might poop his pants.

Fuck him, he deserves to get bullied for not standing up for himself or doing anything to better himself physically.

Posted by: CanFlam at February 23, 2012 2:30 PM

Um. CanFlam, was that badly done sarcasm, or are you just an asshole?

Posted by: Ginger at February 23, 2012 2:51 PM

Ginger, I'd give him a 1 out of 10 for trolling. Nice try CanFlam!

Posted by: banana at February 23, 2012 3:18 PM

Speaking of bullying, this campaign asks people to stop using the word "retarded":

http://www.r-word.org/

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at February 23, 2012 3:34 PM

Oh excellent, Mrs. Julien. More censorship.
The elimination of specific vocabulary solves all problems! Yay.

(Glub, glub) Please sir, when you've finished dunking my head in the toilet, would you mind not calling me "retarded?" (Glub) I find that word offensive. Oh, and (Glub, bubble) I'm not alone, either. There's a website!!!

Posted by: Scott at February 23, 2012 4:00 PM

Kids can see it. They just need to get their parent's permission. Which they should have to get in the first place....

And we saw Schindler's List in the 7th grade, all we needed was a permission slip. Get off your high horse and let parents raise their own children.

Posted by: Littlejon2001 at February 23, 2012 4:12 PM

This article misses the point. If kids see other kids swearing in movies and on TV, they'll just think it's normal and appropriate for kids their age to swear! And since parents evidently cannot be counted on to teach children manners, it is our SOCIETAL AND MORAL OBLIGATION to not expose our children to any swears, ever. Won't someone just THINK OF THE CHILDREN?
..


yep.

Posted by: Amanda6 at February 23, 2012 4:14 PM

Thanks, I needed a good cry today. I'm pretty sure, though he would never admit it, that my son is like that kid on the bus getting knocked around.

Two weeks ago we had to have a 1.5 hour meeting with the bus driver, the transportation supervisor and the asst. principal to discuss his erratic behavior and why he was getting off the bus at an earlier stop than his assigned one (that's against the rules you see). He's been suspended off the bus several times this year for "bad" behavior such as getting off at the earlier stop. He's tried several times to ask the bus driver to move him from his assigned seat, but she just throws him off the bus again for talking back to her. Ugh.

According to the bus driver, when he's not on the bus everyone behaves. Did it never occur to anyone, besides us, that if there was no one to pick on, all the other kids would just chill?

Middle school sucks, and I hate to say it, but when Columbine happened and all the info came out, I wasn't that surprised that those two kids had been bullied. It never ceases to amaze me how obtuse and intentionally unobservant school administrators can be.

Thanks for letting me rant.

Now, my big decision is which feel good film to see first, Bully or We Need to Talk About Kevin.

Posted by: Zombie Mrs Smith at February 23, 2012 4:22 PM

I get punched in the head every single time I try to bring it up, but I'm not going to stop trying, Scott.

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at February 23, 2012 4:28 PM

Nor should you.

Posted by: Ghisent at February 23, 2012 4:30 PM

Every kid in school needs to see this, dammit. I was neither a bully nor one of the bullied in high school. I was timid and would never fight back if I got picked on, but I was one of the bigger kids, so most were reluctant to test me. Also, I managed to get along with everyone pretty decently.

That being said, I wish I'd seen something like this. No one fucked with me, but others were treated pretty brutally. I never personally witnessed anything along the lines of physical abuse, but the teasing could be relentless for some kids. I either couldn't or wouldn't recognize it for the longest time, and even during my senior year I started to think of times when i regretted not stepping in to help someone. I'm two years out of high school and I think about it more and more, especially now that my sister is in high school.

Victims need to see that it will get better, bullies need to see that they don't need to treat others like shit to cope with their own insecurities or meet anyone's expectations, and people in the middle, like me, need to realize that it's time to start helping the problem, and this movie seems to send that message pretty damn well.

Posted by: Patrick the Bunny at February 23, 2012 5:25 PM

Keep on fighting, Mrs. Julien.

Posted by: CC at February 23, 2012 5:41 PM

Teaching your kids how to stand up for themselves against verbal and physical aggression is one thing (and certainly a viable alternative to, oh, I don't know, blind neglect), and a valuable lesson in self-reliance and social autonomy.

The schools and parents have to meet each other halfway here, though. Not every child can physically stand up to a 3 on 1 beatdown, not every parent advocates justified retribution, not every school can devote resources to this issue.

I was bullied in two different countries, just because I was a foreigner in one country, and because I acted like a foreigner in my native country. I had the size to deal with it, but I only started answering every insult, shove, and kick in kind when I got the green light from my parents. They straight up told me "you may get in trouble with the school, but not with us."

The fact of the matter is that it doesn't make it any less EXHAUSTING to have to deal with some insecure lowlife fucking with your calm.

Oh, and if school boards in general deem us fit to see videos of human birth in all its splendor when we're in 10th grade, I don't see what a concentrated dose of f-bombs can possibly do. Preparing anyone for the real world by sheltering them from it is going to do them more harm than good.

Posted by: mpbstereo at February 23, 2012 5:58 PM

I'm around 30, but I'm shocked at some of these comments. Have you been out of school that long that you've forgotten how much you heard 'sh*t' or 'f*ck' at age 11? Hint: it was a lot.

They know what these words are, and the ridiculous family groups responsible for coddling an innocence that doesn't exist gives the MPAA cover.

The movie looks really well done, and it's a shame that the MPAA is limiting its intended audience. That's all on the censors; not the director.

Posted by: Matt at February 23, 2012 6:03 PM

Damn, I want to go God bless America on half of the people who smeared their stupid fucking opinion turd over the youtube comment section of that trailer. Oh, and hello, CanFlam.


Posted by: Rooks at February 23, 2012 6:15 PM

You know, CanFlam, I was briefly tempted to delete your comment, but I decided that it's much better to leave it intact so that everyone can see what a sad, pathetic, trolltastic, asinine and lonely douchebag you are. Congratulations on doing your part to make the world a shittier place.

Posted by: TK at February 23, 2012 6:35 PM

Don't you people know that swear words make the baby Jesus cry and give aid and comfort to our enemies?

I believe it's been proven that America's potty mouths caused Hurricane Katrina and last year's deadly tornadoes. I think they are also responsible for the obesity epidemic.

But it's OK. As long as we can watch Ryan Gosling stomp a guy to death in an elevator, there's still a chance America will prevail. Amen.

Posted by: Slash at February 23, 2012 8:28 PM

But in all seriousness, I was bullied a bit (I was a dork in school), but nothing (I don't think) that has affected me now, nothing like a lot of other kids put up with. I do wish I'd said something back then, been more defensive, instead of just kinda suffering in silence. My mother told me to ignore it and they'd stop, so she was a big help. This was the '80s, by the way. Yeah, I'm old.

The sadists of the world would like us all to believe that treating people terribly is how humans are naturally. It is difficult to believe that it isn't.

Posted by: Slash at February 23, 2012 8:33 PM

Everyone has bully tendencies to some degree. That said, kids can be insanely cruel if the adults around them permit it. Kids don't come into the world fucked up or acting like little psychopaths. Its learned behavior.The short clip of the cow telling the crying mom that the kids, when she is on the bus, are little angels, implying that its her kids fault made me want to punch a wall. I got a niece who loves astronomy. Her third birthday, I spent the night outside with her, freezing my ass off, as we found as many formations as we could with the new telescope I got her. Fast forward to her first weeks of school, my niece is completely down in the dumps and doesn't want to go star gazing anymore. It freaked me out because I never saw her this sad before and it reminded me of when I went to school. I pester her until she tells me her fucking teacher told her that girls aren't supposed to like science, and my niece took her word for it. Not only that, the other kids took to making fun of her for liking stars and space because that is what boys are supposed to like as the teacher made such a big deal about my niece and singled her out repeatedly for it.

I didn't know how to respond to the kid because frankly I was shocked. Who the fuck believes this crap and tells this to kids?!?

Uncle Diablo had to make a few phone calls, take a few days off work, and a certain little girl got to not only see parts of the Air and Space Museum that most people don't get to see, but also got to meet a few nice ladies (including the individual heading up designing long term human zero G habitats for NASA) that were MORE than willing to explain to her that YES GIRLS CAN LIKE SCIENCE!

I swear I have never wanted to punch a woman before...

Posted by: Diablo at February 23, 2012 9:05 PM

Shit, piss, and industrial waste ... kids talk like that all the damned time. Fuck the Hays Office - er, the MPAA!

Posted by: The Wanderer at February 23, 2012 9:08 PM

Diablo, you are the coolest aunt in the world, and your niece is a lucky future female astronaut for having you.
I was never bullied in school, but I knew someone who was, pretty badly. One day my younger brother (who is obviously a better person and has has bigger balls than mine) got fed up with it, stood up to her bullies, kicked their ass (he was pretty good at Karate at the time), and let everyone know that from then on, whoever messed with the girl, messed with him. That was a pretty bold move, considering he was a freshman at the time, and the bullies were junior and senior. The girl's parents came to our house to thank him, it was all very sad and touching. I guess I never realized how bad it really was for her, until this happened and I heard her mother cry while telling my parents of what their daughter had been through. Now I have kids of my own, and from day one in school I have done my very best to instill in them the "respect others and respect yourself" rule. And vowed to never fall into the "kids will be kids" trap!

I guess this doesn't have much to do with anything, but I wanted to share.

Posted by: Cuca at February 23, 2012 9:39 PM

Sorry, Diablo, I meant the coolest UNCLE!

Posted by: Cuca at February 23, 2012 9:40 PM

Diablo, that story is both fantastic and horrifying. You are the world's coolest uncle, and that teacher sounds like a throwback to the 1950s. Girls can't do science? Seriously?? She needs to rethink her career, because she should not be teaching young people about the world. Girls who like science are awesome. You can tell her from an older nerd girl that the guys who tease you for not being girly are usually the stupid ones, and shouldn't ever be listened to.

Posted by: BiblioGeek at February 23, 2012 10:27 PM

Diablo, hats off man.

And to the teacher who advocates that women should be in science? Hypatia, Marie Curie, Sally Ride, and Jane Goodall (to name a few) might have something to say about that.

Posted by: mpbstereo at February 23, 2012 11:01 PM

*shouldn't

Posted by: mpbstereo at February 23, 2012 11:04 PM

It breaks my heart to see how kids can treat one another. Kids are just so cruel sometimes, and I remember it going on in my days in school as well; I avoided it mostly. However, I would like to know, is there actually an increase in bullying over the last few years or is it just perceived? Logically I would think it's been going on since formal schooling existed. Would like to see some statistics though.

Posted by: Reena at February 24, 2012 1:57 AM

High school is a prison.

-- Mojo Nixon

Posted by: , at February 24, 2012 2:03 AM

So, Weinstein lost his bid. Can't say I'm surprised, really.

And there are many reasons why I plan to never become a mother, but one of my greatest fears is that despite my best efforts, I'd end up raising a little monster who torments his/her peers and grows up to be a massive shithead. I'd like to think that if I were somehow given the responsibility of raising a kid, I'd be able to turn out a kind, decent, responsible citizen who contributes more to society than he/she takes, but frankly parenting has always seemed like too much of a crapshoot for me. You try to do right by your child but there are so many other, potentially corrupting influences out there. So much of it seems to be out of your hands.

In short, there are already one too many assholes out there. The world doesn't need another.

Posted by: CC at February 24, 2012 2:04 AM

Diablo, I read that story twice because the ending made me so happy. You are an awesome aunt.

I was also shocked though. Wtf teacher?

Posted by: Patrick the Bunny at February 24, 2012 3:24 AM

I was always mildly intrigued by the rating system but once I saw This Film Is Not Yet Rated I was completely enraged. What an asinine method of judging a film's appropriate audience.

Posted by: cinekat at February 24, 2012 3:36 AM

That's a decent sentiment, CC, but what are you going to do about yourself?

Posted by: Salad_Is_Murder at February 24, 2012 4:04 AM

I didn't know him then, but from what he's told me, my husband WAS that kid with the classes in the header pic. I was bullied too, but at least I had friends who made it all bearable. So yeah, tears. And lots of them.

Trying to stop bullying seems hopeless to me though. I see it as a form of social control -- the pack picking on the ones who are too different. When meeting my ertswhile bullies, I've noticed that they still don't think they did anything wrong. There's no remorse, no regret, no hint that they even realize what they did to me and others. It was our own fault for being "uggos" or whatever it was that we did wrong. Exist, probably. How do you stop something like that? It's hopeless.

Last but not least, Diablo, I love your nieace a little bit right now. At first, I wanted to believe there's no way that the teacher could be really real, but... There's no shortage of stupip people in this world, more's the pity. At least your niece also has awesome adults in her life, like you and her parents, to balance out the suck.

Posted by: Sylvia at February 24, 2012 4:06 AM

I was a bully (emotional, not physical) from ages 10-16. I am plagued every day by the knowledge that I hurt other children and made their lives unhappy. I have lately reached out and apologized to the few whom I could find, to let them know that it's not a casual thing for me, and is a part of my life for which I am deeply ashamed. Yes, there were reasons (family troubles, deep insecurities, etc...), but none of that makes me feel even a little bit better about the pain that I caused.

I'm angry as hell at the adults who let this happen. None of this was hidden and I was never punished or ostracized. I didn't understand the damage that I was doing to these kids and I wish to hell that I had been made to sit through a documentary like this: to see how UGLY and pathetic my behaviour was - and to see it in the company of my victims, so that I couldn't live in denial of the consequences of my actions. Or at least to empower them to group together and shut me (and my friends) down.

I think I grew up to be a pretty moral person, who now spends much of her time (professional and personal) protecting and standing up for those that suffer or are exploited, but I'll never escape the shame of those years, or the disappointment that it was allowed to occur. Any society that is more disturbed by conversational swearing than child abuse, needs some serious cultural therapy.

Posted by: ex-bully at February 24, 2012 9:20 AM

Keeping a R rating means my husband can't show this to his 7th grade kids. Fuck you MPAA

Posted by: lilianna28 at February 24, 2012 10:15 AM

I wish, wish, wish I could have shown this to my 9th graders. How sad, too, that the reason I can't show it is for "language", when my kiddos have the most creatively filthy mouths I have ever encountered.

Posted by: Miss Beca at February 24, 2012 1:39 PM

ex-bully, I applaud your honesty. There's no shame in admitting as such, and I find that yours is as valuable a lesson and story to share as is a victim's story. It cuts both ways.

In my own case, one of the bullies I had when I was younger is actually a pretty decent guy these days. Though he hasn't acknowledged that he was a raging dick to me when we were younger, I can tell he's grown up and matured into a well adjusted person. He's always happy to see me and shoot the shit (we're both huge baseball fans). It was an important lesson in forgiveness for me; forgiving was just one of the many ramifications of my experience with the subject when I was younger, yet one that I am ultimately grateful for.

Posted by: mpbstereo at February 24, 2012 1:51 PM

Another thing to add to this: Passion of the Christ was rated R. It made $370 million dollars and was/is shown in churches, collegs...you better believe CONSERVATIVE families took their kids to see that movie. Just because the movie is Rated R doesn't mean kids will never get to see it. Kids just won't be able to see it by themselves...which I doubt they would've done to begin with anyway. This really is barely limiting the movie, it's just allowing parents to be well informed as to the heavy content this movie has so that they can adequately prepare their children to watch.

And just because kids hear cursing at a young age doesn't make it right. Not EVERY kid is cursing. Stop making that blanket statement bc it's not true at all. If you don't think movies affect children's beliefs, then you are dead wrong. Especially a documentary.

The movie looks great and I'm sure permission slips will be given so that the movie can be shown in schools.

Posted by: Littlejon2001 at February 25, 2012 12:44 AM

I was definitely the odd kid out for many years. I liked classical music and tennis instead of rap and football, I liked to read and play the piano, and later I was outed by a former friend and then tormented for being gay. Those scars fade with time, but they do not disappear. I was suicidal for years and ended up in the hospital at one point. I have spent hours in therapy and will undoubtedly spend many more trying to untangle the mess of insecurities and self-destructive defense mechanisms I developed. That this movie is being censored for a few four letter words - with utter disregard for its value - is not surprising, but it is sure as hell infuriating. We are still so backward in a lot of ways and something has got to give.

A few years ago I was home on Christmas break and went for a drink with an old friend. At the bar was one of the kids who used to bully me in elementary school. I have a good six inches on him and no reason to be afraid, but at the sight of him I had my same old Pavlovian response of heart palpitations and nausea. But he asked how I was doing and seemed genuinely interested, and he bought my next round and wished me the best before heading out. I knew he wasn't a bad guy - we were friends before he got in with the popular crowd and started picking on me with the rest of them - but peer pressure is a damned hard force to fight against, and no authority figure ever told him to stop. He didn't apologize, not directly, but I'm pretty sure that was as close as he was able to get. I wish movies like this were required viewing in schools... We are far too glib about bullying. Kids will be kids? Okay, but that doesn't mean they shouldn't learn empathy as young as possible.

And now that I'm thinking about it, I remember being a bully myself on one occasion. I wanted so badly to be accepted and I got instant approval for making fun of one particular target. If we focused on him, it meant I wasn't in the crosshairs. It has been at least a decade, but I still feel disgusted with myself. What shame... I would like to apologize, but I don't know how to reach out, or if he'd prefer not to remember those years. I know if one of my tormentors sent me a message out of the blue owning up to making my life hell, it would mean a lot. Maybe I'm just hypersensitive, but I think an apology to this guy is long overdue. Time to fix that.

Posted by: Colin at February 26, 2012 3:49 AM

I saw this film last summer at Hot Docs Film Festival in Toronto when it was called "The Bully Project."

I cannot understand how this film has received an R rating. Bully should be accessible to young and old alike, it's a tremendously important film.

I actually had the pleasure of meeting Lee Hirsch and it's immediately obvious how much he cares about this cause. The MPAA rating system needs to take its head out of its ass.

Posted by: citizen_cris at February 27, 2012 5:10 PM

I too was bullied by my teachers - I mean, there was no physical violence but there were *many* public dressing-downs and behind-the-scenes-machinations to keep the uppity girl out of the higher level math classes. I finally gave up when I hit calculus as a sophomore in high school, could no longer teach myself everything out of the book, and when I asked questions in class the teacher derided and laughed at me. But all of this is only to say that I'm so horny for Diablo right now I'ma have to go to my bunk.

Posted by: kucheza at March 8, 2012 9:36 PM