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Disney's Newest Fairy Tale Is Decidedly Not Grimm

By TK | Posted Under Trailers | Comments (41)

RapunzelDisney1.jpg

I have no idea what the hell I’m doing writing about Tangled, the newest offering from the Mouse House. It’s a take on Rapunzel, you know, the chick with the super long hair, trapped in a tower by a witch who bargained for her life with Rapunzel’s father. A prince comes along, they fall in love, the witch pulls a bait-and-switch and shoves the prince out the window and he’s blinded by thorns?

That last part, I’m guessing, doesn’t make it into this version. In fact, there doesn’t appear to be a prince at all, but rather a rakish rogue who’s escaping the authorities. And Rapunzel appears to know some sort of hairkido. Or hair-fu, if you prefer. Possibly hairkwondo?

Work with me people. I’m in uncharted territory here. I don’t know who would usually write these up, but it sure as shit ain’t me.

Anyway, it looks rather inoffensive and will likely please the kiddies. It’s got the typical near-adult jokes to keep parents from being bored out of their fucking skulls. Rapunzel is voiced by Mandy Moore, one of my inexplicable crushes (get fucked, Rowles), and the prince/rogue/whatever is played by Zachary Levi (“Chuck”).

Anyway, here’s the trailer. It will mildly amuse you for 120 seconds.

It should be noted that this also stars the voices of Ewan McGregor, Jeffrey Tambor, Steve Martin, and Ron Perlman. Shit. That means I’m contractually obligated to see it.









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Comments

I am still annoyed that the title and focus of this movie was changed after Disney "decided" that they can no longer market movies where a girl is the main focus. Piss off Disney.

Posted by: Nimue at June 23, 2010 9:05 AM

Huh. You know, Nimue, I hadn't heard that, but it's pretty telling that Rapunzel doesn't have a single word of dialogue in the trailer.

Posted by: The Other Agent Johnson at June 23, 2010 9:09 AM

I'm bored out of my skull right now.

Posted by: , at June 23, 2010 9:10 AM

TK did better than fine, its Disney, it's animated and I won't get my knickers in a bunch until I see it. I think Disney may be trying to market to a wider audience. One of my son’s favorite picture books was Rapunzel by Paul O. Zelinsky. Paul kept it closer to the old tale rather than prettying it up for the kids. But I can hear my son giggling now over the fight scene with the hair.

Could be worse…anyone up for the animated tales of the human centipede?

Posted by: karen at June 23, 2010 9:25 AM

Good Godtopus, what a load of shit. Where's Ponyo when you need her?

Posted by: Cindy at June 23, 2010 9:26 AM

Disney "decided" that they can no longer market movies where a girl is the main focus.

'the fuck?
I guess I shouldn't be surprised. Studio execs seem to possess less and less intelligence as time goes by, these days.

Posted by: Rykker at June 23, 2010 9:28 AM

Why do all the cartoon movies have to have hip, adult references? It dates them so badly that they'll never be classics. The reason the early cartoon movies are classics is because they stayed true to the original fairy tale and didn't try to be "current." Today's kids don't even know the original fairy tales, so how are they supposed to "get" the satire?

Posted by: BWeaves at June 23, 2010 9:28 AM

I thought cartoon guy was Adrien Brody. Not the voice, the face.

Posted by: Bweaves at June 23, 2010 9:30 AM

Oh it's grim all right.

Jesus Christ.

Posted by: Paul Southworth at June 23, 2010 9:31 AM

BWeaves, you're reading my mind in both your comments this morning. I immediately thought of Adrien Brody. And I can't stand, and don't take my kids to all the kids' movies directed at adults - can't kids be kids awhile?

Posted by: Cindy at June 23, 2010 9:41 AM

Huh. You know, Nimue, I hadn't heard that, but it's pretty telling that Rapunzel doesn't have a single word of dialogue in the trailer.

According to Disney, that small grunt totally counts.

And, Karen, we need to get on that right away. It worked for Beetlejuice.

Posted by: admin at June 23, 2010 9:41 AM

Oh God. The hair thing was... disturbing on so many levels. Out of my brain, dammit!

Also, you're wrong, she does have dialogue. When she's swinging around on her... on her... - I can't bring myself to say it.

Excuse me, I need to find the lye.

Posted by: Jay at June 23, 2010 9:44 AM

Since Zachary Levi is my current amour du jour, I have to be excited about this movie. Especially since it's got to be tons better than the last family movie he was in considering this one doesn't have singing chipmunks. I'll probably see it because I like animated movies and I also think Mandy Moore is fun.

I'd also like to say that I think Levi will be going on my five. Now if only I could figure out the other four...

Posted by: Kayanne at June 23, 2010 9:49 AM

anyone up for the animated tales of the human centipede?

Yes. Yes I am.

You know, when I saw the header pic, I was all, "Why can't they go back to the hand-drawn animation style? I don't like the looks of this," and then when I actually watched the trailer, I decided that I'd actually enjoy the style of this movie, except for how it kind of looks like crap. And after reading Nimue's comment above, I've "decided" that I can't be bothered with Disney, since I am, after all, just a girl.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at June 23, 2010 9:54 AM

Oh, yeah, and WTF with the hair?! That's just stupid.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at June 23, 2010 9:55 AM

I never actually knew how the story ended. Wikipedia has filled me in. Thank you!

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at June 23, 2010 9:56 AM

That Pink song is an instant turn off. No matter what movie it's for. I just can't get past it.

Posted by: SarahSue at June 23, 2010 10:00 AM

AvB is just a girl in the world. That's all that they'll let her be.

Posted by: admin at June 23, 2010 10:04 AM

I saw this trailer last night before Toy Story 3 and it was just. . . utter shit. Completely underwhelming, and you can totally see out of touch Disney trying way too hard to make their old fairytale formula work for "modern" boys. I doubt the movie will be bad so much as sad.

Posted by: teacupnosaucer at June 23, 2010 10:15 AM

...I am going to see this. And, so help me Godtopus, I am going to enjoy it.

Posted by: Kevin at June 23, 2010 10:19 AM

I was sold on this movie when I saw the trailer and the main guy character turned out to be EXACTLY like my Dungeons & Dragons Bard character. Down to the over-confident attitude and even the OUTFIT.
So yeah, I'm a geek. And yeah, that will be 98% of why I'm going to see this.

@ The Other Agent Johnson: she has dialogue. She says/squeals "best day ever!!" when she's swinging around on her hair at the end.

I must say I like the international tease trailer much better. Less Shrek-ish, more a focus on the mystery of Rapunzel (and she ís the main 'mystery', so I can see why she isn't left, right and centre in the trailers). And the soundtrack makes a HUGE difference: less pop music, more fantasy (hi Narnia).
You can see it here: http://www.ropeofsilicon.com/movie/tangled/trailers/7441
(It amuses me that it's in Dutch/Flemish: didn't expect to hear my language on an international film site so at first I barely understood what he was saying because I expected English!)

Posted by: Linda at June 23, 2010 10:40 AM

Aww, this looks totally cute and potentially hilarious. I cracked up at "the smolder". The animation is pretty gorgeous, too. Just seems like harmless Disney stuff, so I don't know, why get offended? Dreamworks makes worst stuff every single day.

Also, is it weird that the guy seems totally hot to me? Maybe.

Posted by: figgy at June 23, 2010 10:42 AM

Admittedly, I will see this. Not in theaters - rugrats cramp my style. But I don't know how to not watch Disney movies. I will resent myself for it. I will throw things and be angry at how the staples of my childhood aren't made anymore, and I'll mourn what that means for my children. And then marathon all of the classics till TheMaskedEmu throws me out, lol

Posted by: KatSings at June 23, 2010 10:44 AM

Dammit, admin! TAKE THIS PINK RIBBON OFF MY EYES!

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at June 23, 2010 10:56 AM

I know this looks bad, but I just love Zachary Levi so much.
Of course I won't see it, but I will gently rebuke all of you for hating on his movie.

Stop it!

PS: That was a really soft exclamation point. Remember, it's a gentle rebuke.

Posted by: A-schaef at June 23, 2010 11:41 AM

Figgy: Oddly enough, I'm right there with you. Although for me, it's because he looks like a rather hot friend of mine. This may be a problem.

Posted by: Kevin at June 23, 2010 11:46 AM

I got the impression that Rapunzel may be mute. But what do I know? And Marvel fanboys will be interested to see if she's Medusa with a bad dye job.

Posted by: idiosynchronic at June 23, 2010 12:27 PM

MANDY MOORE!?!??!?! MANDY F-ING MOORE?!???? THAT'S your secret crush? Who the HELL is writing this crap?!?!?!! Some 14 year old boy has switched places with TK. That is the ONLY way this can possibly be explained.

And yes, I will go and see this movie, but only after I catch the new Twilight.

Posted by: Mr. Yuck at June 23, 2010 12:50 PM

Sort of off topic, but I used to rent Shelley Duvall's Faerie Tale Theater from the library (yeah, we were poor and library movies were free) and I remember the Rapunzel one had Jeff Bridges in it and the part where he lost his eyes absolutely terrified me. It was like weird, fake blood streaking down his face...blech.

Posted by: ninetwenteetoo at June 23, 2010 1:22 PM

1) @Mr. Yuck, Mandy Moore is TOTALLY adorable.

2) @ ninetwenteetoo, SD's FTT is currently on Netflix Instant. Just FYI.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at June 23, 2010 1:44 PM

I'm so sad about this. When I first read about it, it sounded like they were going to do something more classic like Sleeping Beauty style. But now this....

I have no problem with the funnier movies trying to make them more modern but I feel like they keep flinching on the more serious stuff. Emperor's New Groove was originally supposed to be more serious, but I guess it tested badly. I thought it was great the way it turned out, but I do wonder if they will ever make another Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella or even Lion King.

Posted by: WT at June 23, 2010 1:58 PM

AvB - I actually just added it to my queue before I left the comment. I'll be watching it on my Wii tonight :)
I'm obviously a glutton for punishment, since half of them gave me nightmares.

Posted by: ninetwenteetoo at June 23, 2010 4:35 PM

Dreamworks makes worst stuff every single day.

You best be excluding How to Train Your Dragon from that list, m'Lady.

Posted by: Rykker at June 23, 2010 6:53 PM

You're right. I was mildly amused.

I was also mildly aroused by the suggestion of hair bondage.

You don't suppose Disney would...

...

...Naaaaaaah.

Posted by: Jerce at June 23, 2010 7:18 PM

Probably not, Jerce... but now the Internet will.

Posted by: j. at June 23, 2010 7:43 PM

that trailer hurt. with the princess and the frog, i thought disney was finally putting some charm and magic back in their movies, and i liked the classic style animation. and then they follow it with this cutesy hip computer generated crap. who is the target audience? doesn't really seem to be kids

Posted by: idleprimate at June 23, 2010 9:15 PM


Huh. I really don't get it! I jsut watched it again and it still looked pretty cute. Not that we have to agree on everything, but it confuses me. I like the hair thing.

I do hate the use of the song. I really hope it doesn't have some stupid 'modern' soundtrack. Aside from that, I didn't see any stupid pop-culture references, and she does get the 'best day ever!' line, so while it's not as much dialogue as he gets I don't get the 'she's mute' comments.

Ah, well. You can't agree on everything. I'm not saying it looks like genius, just...I don't think it's offensively bad or anything...

Posted by: figgy at June 23, 2010 11:33 PM

@ beaverplatz (great name btw)- I couldn't agree more about missing the old 2-D Disney hand drawn animation style....this just looks like everything else...and to make matters worse...3-D CGI isn't enough, they want us to wear the freakin' glasses too. I'm not going!

Posted by: RobinPA at June 23, 2010 11:56 PM

That thing in animated movies where someone gets a head injury and has an addlepated happy face as they slump to the floor? Cracks me up every time.

Posted by: Craig at June 24, 2010 10:01 AM

Disney is obviously trying too hard.

Posted by: Aaliyah at July 30, 2010 4:39 AM

@WT: Actually, "Empire of the Sun" was really just boring as hell (trust me, saw the story boards >.>). To be honest, Emperor's New Groove was the best/smartest all-out fun-fest that Disney's done; the issue is that they keep trying to recapture what happened there without realizing that it works best when it's honestly the animators having a blast doing it, not scripted and forced.

...Has anyone else noticed that in all the lands populated by talking animals, Disney horses are personified, but somehow NEVER allowed to talk? O_o Weird.

I'll stream this online. Maybe.

Posted by: Daft Steampunk at September 3, 2010 5:31 AM