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I Know It Isn't Your Scene, It's Better Than a Sex Scene

By TK | Posted Under Trailers | Comments (24)



Suicide_Girls_Contest_4_by_lexarexa.jpg

So, raise your hands: Who among you are followers/fans of Suicide Girls? It’s nothing to be ashamed of. We’ve got a bent enough readership that there must be a few of them. If you are, this might be a treat for you.

If you’re not, a quick primer: Suicide Girls is a website that features softcore pinup/glamor models who tend to be of the goth/punk variety, frequently featuring women with numerous tattoos and/or piercings. It’s also become its own not-so-little community, with forums and memberships, and it seems to have developed into its own little world. They’ve become quite popular, featuring interviews, commentary, news articles, and a substantial merch store as well.

And now they have a movie. A Blair Witch-style, shaky cam, lost-in-the-woods, is-it-real kind of movie, entitled Suicide Girls Must Die!. The story is painfully simple — a bunch of the models go into the woods for a photoshoot, they start dying, and everyone loses their shit. Not exactly breaking new ground, and there’s probably a less-tattooed version playing on Cinemax as I type this. The catch, according to the film makers, is that all of it (except the killings, of course) is real, and that the models don’t realize it’s fake.

I don’t know if I buy that.

Regardless, as much as I sort of respect what the Suicide Girls do — promote an unconventional, less vanilla kind of beauty and sex appeal — the movie itself looks… pretty stupid. See for yourself:

The films comes out on DVD on June 28th.









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Comments

Isn't there always a group that has an "unconventional, less vanilla kind of beauty and sex appeal"? Isn't this more flavour of the month just with higher laser tattoo removal bills?

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at June 22, 2010 9:13 AM

Mrs. Julien: The Suicide Girls site has been around for years and was one of the first alt-girls sites. Given the popularity of alt-girl porn I would say, no, it's not a passing fad.

Also, the tatooed/pierced/punk look is pretty damn hot and those type of girls make up at least half of my dating history. With that said, this movie looks dumb as shit.

Posted by: TylerDFC at June 22, 2010 9:26 AM

You know what? I support a novel horror film concept. Though I've heard this conceit used before in films, I can't think of another film where the "actors" weren't told what kind of film they were in. It's very Scare Tactics, only with less Shannon Doherty being a bitch, which is obviously a mixed bag.

My guess about the authenticity is this: the girls knew they would be filmed. They did not know they were in a slasher film. The first couple girls were grabbed with no warning and the rest figured out what was going on real quick. They played along without a script and the production team threw as many twists and turns into their path as they could. Judging by the Suicide Girls-type, methinks they know how a slasher goes. What will be fun is seeing how many are trying to set themselves up as the survivor girl or other slasher archetype during the remainder of the film.

Posted by: Robert at June 22, 2010 9:27 AM

Assuming they never noticed the cameras and the boom mics and makeup crews and the craft service table, etc, think of just how angry you'd be to discover that someone put you through all this for a shitty direct-to-DVD movie. Oh, there's going to be a bloody murder scene, motherfucker.

Posted by: Tracer Bullet at June 22, 2010 9:28 AM

@TylerDFC

Well then I guess the only appropriate response is

YOU KIDS GET OFF MY LAWN!

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at June 22, 2010 9:28 AM

My theory? It was all poorly scripted from the start. Everyone knew what was going on. It's going to be a piece of shit. The girls are pretty.

Posted by: TSF at June 22, 2010 9:30 AM

I was very, very serious about being a suicide girl(still am)but hey require full frontal nudity and that shit dont fly with me

Posted by: Nadine at June 22, 2010 9:30 AM

I want it to be real

I so badly want it to be real

But they'd get sued if it were... sooo bad


Want to see it for the shitty 'OMG THIS IS SO REAL' acting

Posted by: Camilla at June 22, 2010 9:38 AM

While I've got no issue with tattoos and piercings and attractive women (quite the opposite) that justlooks terrible. I'd rather go to suicidesparkletits.com and check the Prince Albert on that hunk o' flesh. At least the production values are higher.

Posted by: admin at June 22, 2010 9:59 AM

I'm with you, Nadine. My friend tried to convince me to join her in getting involved, but as much as I LOVE glamour and pinup, I don't want to do full frontal. The allure of pinup (IMHO) is not the revealed, but the hidden. Plus, not neeeeeearly enough tattoos for SG...

Posted by: Patty O'Green at June 22, 2010 10:01 AM

Nadine - I used to really want to be a Suicide Girl, too. Now, not so much. I don't think I would want any job where they allowed me to think I was going to be killed by a psycho/ my friends and coworkers were actually killed.
On second thought, considering some of coworkers...

Posted by: ninetwenteetoo at June 22, 2010 10:03 AM

Patty, exactly!! Their whole vibe appeals to me majorly and I still regularly check out what they're up to and who the newest SG is etc, but my tatas are reserved for....like, me and about one other person.

Ninetwenteetoo Yeah...the whole 'we're letting you think we're out for your blood' thing might make for a more stressful workday than I'm used to!

Posted by: Nadine at June 22, 2010 10:22 AM

I can't think of another film where the "actors" weren't told what kind of film they were in.

Not to the same extent, but Vera Drake is such film. No?

Posted by: SB at June 22, 2010 10:27 AM

I have never ever wanted to be a suicide girl ever. Im all for freedom of expression and individuality I just hate tattoos. I know they are supposed to make you unique, just like everyone else but Im not a fan.

Posted by: Nieve 'The Threadkiller Queen' at June 22, 2010 10:50 AM

Suicide Girls has an extremely shady contract and highly exploitative practices regarding their girls. Don't sign up with them, Pajiba ladies, it's not funny when actual cool people are being exploited. You're better off doing your own alt modeling work and PR - it doesn't come with built-in publicity and you have to work harder to find clients and buyers, but at least some company doesn't get to pretend to be you after you quit to keep raking in the money off your image and persona.

Posted by: Nat Kittyface at June 22, 2010 11:37 AM

If it's true that the models didn't know it was fake, then that's a pretty cool concept that they're working with. I'd actually be a little interested in seeing that.

Some friends and I will occasionally have Cake and Porn Night which is exactly what it says on the tin: we eat cake and watch softcore together. It's usually to laugh/mock the Cinemax fare and whatever. Anyway, one night, they were showing this Suicide Girls "documentary" where they sent a bunch of models and a handful of photographers to a villa in Tuscany to hang out and do photo-shoots.
It was boring as hell except for one girl called Honey Manko. She had this weird kinda English/Euro-trash accent and kept saying that she and the models were "just a bunch of a hawwwwwt gurrrrrls." That and she was also super-pleased with how "manko" means "cunt" in Japanese, so her name means Honey Cunt.
It kind of turned me off to SG as a whole.

Posted by: Sassafrass Green at June 22, 2010 11:42 AM

Someone gave me a subscription to that site as a gift. No joke. I checked it out, and it's not half bad; the women are obviously attractive, but there's a lot of fun discussion going on, especially in their forums. There are some genuinely cool people over there.

Posted by: ChristianH at June 22, 2010 12:21 PM

And I'm one of them, ChristianH, though, I probably comment more over here than I do over there. If anyone else ever visits the site, look for me under the name Vonnegution.

Also, I don't think SG requires you to show your hoo-ha, if you don't want to, though it's encouraged because, hey, guys like to look at girls' hoo-has and you're more likely to go Pink if you show yours off. I've seen plenty of sets where the girls never do full-frontal, or, if they do, it's in the vein of Playboy and not Hustler.

That said, I'm "friends" with a few of the SGs and they definitely complain about the politics of it all. So many good sets don't get picked for... I don't know why, even established SGs sometimes can't get their sets to go live. But, I try to stay out of that. As for rights, the only complaints I've ever heard are that the models don't get paid until their sets do go live/Pink, so, yeah, SG is making money off them until that happens. Everyone knows that going in, which is why if you like a set, you try your damndest to get it live.

Posted by: RobP at June 22, 2010 12:47 PM

Nieve you hate tattoos?

*sadface*

As for the movie? Fuck it. It seems like they got the dumbest tattooed girls they possibly could to be in the film. Just have one girl go, "You know what? Peace out bitches. I'm leaving."

Posted by: DeistBrawler at June 22, 2010 1:34 PM

@ Robert. To be completely honest I think that this movie might be improved by the addition of Shannon Doherty just randomly popping up and acting like a complete, irredeemable bitch for no reason other than that she is Shannon Doherty and that is what she does.

Posted by: matt at June 22, 2010 2:20 PM

Now you all know why Nieve is out to kill me...I have tattoos...

Posted by: Nadine at June 22, 2010 3:30 PM

my friend is on there... anyway... the girl in the banner pic + her tattoos are super beautiful. a lot of the girls on there? not so much.

Posted by: kristin at June 22, 2010 3:45 PM

SB, that was actually the only film I could think of (I actually deleted a reference to it before submitting the comment), but it is different. They knew they were in a British period drama set around the character of Vera. They just didn't know about the abortions (Imelda Staunton aside) until the necessary reveal for the characters. But Mike Leigh's not the first director to selectively hand out scripts and it's not like he told the cast they were in a class comedy and revealed it was a serious politically driven character study.

Posted by: Robert at June 22, 2010 5:33 PM

Its not so much I hate tattoos as I just think yeah they look sweet and cool now but what happens when you get old and wrinkly and they look like a dirty smudge on your skin and you grandkids keep trying to wipe them off cos they think that, with the alzheimiers, you've been drawing on yourself?

I just never 'got' the suicide girls something about them really irritates me, Like if we were at a party and struck up a conversation they wouldnt talk to me because I wasnt punk enough. I dont know they are probably really nice I just get annoyed by people who think its super cool and punk to swear a lot and have names that end in the word C U Next Tuesday.

Nadine I dont want to kill you I just want to shut you up sometimes, it has nothing to do with your tattoos and more to do with YOUR BIG MOUTH!

Posted by: Nieve 'The Threadkiller Queen' at June 23, 2010 7:06 AM