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She Wanted To Be A Secret Girl, A Waking Dream

By TK | Posted Under Trailers | Comments (48)

sucker-punch-movie.jpg

Ladies and gentlemen, the next Superman director.

Here’s the new trailer for Zack Snyder’s Sucker Punch, about a young girl committed to a mental asylum who fantasizes about a dream world with giant samurai and dragons and robots and God knows what the fuck else. It’s like Snyder (who also co-wrote the screenplay) took every idea from every cartoon, video game and comic book he’s ever seen, threw in a dash of Dungeons and Dragons and Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow, and just lit the bitch on fire.

And I’m strangely compelled by it. I don’t know why. I haven’t really liked much of his work — I was bored and annoyed by Watchmen and initially enjoyed 300, but action scenes aside, it doesn’t really hold up after the first time. That said, the man knows how to work with the pretty, and there’s plenty of that in Sucker Punch. There’s a fair chance it’s going to be a bombastic, bloated mess. But it might still manage to be damn entertaining. Who knows.

It’s got a pretty interesting cast, including Emily Browning, Abbie Cornish, Jena Malone
Vanessa Hudgens, Jamie Chung, Carla Gugino, Jon Hamm (HAAAAAAAAAMMMMM) and… Scott Glen? How the fuck did he get there? Was David Carradine booked up?

Anyway.

What say you?









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Comments

That insane asylum stocks insane amounts of beauty products but apparently can't afford a groundskeeper. Budget cuts. Whaddya gonna do?

Posted by: Kballs at November 4, 2010 10:39 AM

Was David Carradine booked up?

If by "booked-up" you actually mean tressed-up and made somewhat dead...

Posted by: Rykker at November 4, 2010 10:40 AM

Well, I'd call that a big "yes."

Posted by: TK at November 4, 2010 10:42 AM

"Scott Glen? How the fuck did he get there? Was David Carradine booked up? "

David Carradine is dead, and in a way more kinky way than this entire movie.

(yeah, yeah, someone already mentioned that. I was posting while drinking... again. Suck it. --TK)

Posted by: BWeaves at November 4, 2010 10:44 AM

Dammit, everyone else beat me to the David Carradine thing. Stupid delay. But this movie actually looks like it might be fun in a mindless sort of way.

Posted by: KatSings at November 4, 2010 10:46 AM

And Kballs stole the crack I was going to make about the overdone makeup. Well done!

Posted by: BWeaves at November 4, 2010 10:46 AM

Actually, I thought, Was Keith Carradine unavailable? Why wouldn't you go for the Kill Bill connection with this?

And, yes, I feel like I shouldn't want to watch this, but I see no evidence to prove that. So, so, so much evidence to the contrary, really. If his Superman is even remotely this... original (yes, mash-ups and the like can also be "original")... then I think we're all in for a grand ole time.

Posted by: RobP at November 4, 2010 10:49 AM

Video Games: The Movie!

Posted by: Paul Southworth at November 4, 2010 10:49 AM

Or: Girl Interrupted: The Video Game!

Posted by: Paul Southworth at November 4, 2010 10:52 AM

Also, if anyone remembers this movie come next Halloween, those costumes are gonna get a LOT of play. Since most women dress up as sexy/slutty "insert noun here", this is a perfect line up of options.

Posted by: KatSings at November 4, 2010 10:52 AM

Why wouldn't you go for the Kill Bill connection with this?

'cuz Bill was played by David, not Keith.

Keith was Wild Bill Hickock in "Deadwood."

Posted by: Rykker at November 4, 2010 10:53 AM

I'm well aware of that, Rykker. The "connection" comes from the fact that they're brothers.

Posted by: RobP at November 4, 2010 11:01 AM

Tenuous.

Posted by: Rykker at November 4, 2010 11:06 AM

I'm going to watch it. Maybe even in a theater with a $20 bucket of popcorn. It's the dragons, I think. I use to have huge dragon posters on my wall instead of teen pinups. Amazingly, I didn't get beat up a lot.

Posted by: Michin70 at November 4, 2010 11:06 AM

Well, I for one think it looks beautiful, and sometimes that's enough for a viewing.

Posted by: Anna von Beav at November 4, 2010 11:10 AM

I'm not paying to see Vanessa Hudgens in anything.

Posted by: Andrew at November 4, 2010 11:13 AM

It's pretty, but then again, Snyder always does pretty.

In the theaters that's all you need.

Posted by: Fredo at November 4, 2010 11:16 AM

So much jail bait, so little time.

Posted by: admin at November 4, 2010 11:17 AM

I'm a little worried that the girl cast in the lead (is that Emily Browning? too lazy to IMDB) looks a little weak. Like she's letting her false eyelashes do all the work for her. Hear me out before you dump some pig's blood on this suggestion, I think the chica who plays Quinn Fabray on Glee would have been better. She's got the same look, and, say what you will about that stupid show, she's the best actual actress on it (barring Ms. Lynch, of course-who ain't got the gams for that costume).

Of course it's moot to recast a movie once it's been shot. But that was my distracting reaction. That and Jena Malone looks surprisingly good with that short hair and I like Carla Cugino's ridiculously fake accent in this better than Cate Blanchett's ridiculously fake accent in the Indy4 Abomination.

Posted by: coveredinbees at November 4, 2010 11:18 AM

Seems to me that it would work better as a music video than a 90 minute film.

Posted by: shanmarie at November 4, 2010 11:18 AM

It's nice to see he's branching out stylistically and finally incorporating some of that sudden-slow-mo stuff into his work.

Posted by: Christopher at November 4, 2010 11:19 AM

Watchmen was boring because the source material was boring. He did as good of a job with it as one could hope for.

Posted by: Matt at November 4, 2010 11:21 AM

It pains me to say this, to finally say it out loud, but I'm getting old. There was a time in my life when the jailbait and the comic book plot and visuals would have been enough for me to overlook what is obviously a terrible story and acting. Alas no longer can I turn a blind eye.

I'm going up to the top of hill now to wait for my death. My body will eventually roll down into the river where people will come to wash their clothing.

Posted by: Porkchop Express at November 4, 2010 11:35 AM

TK: I actually thought the David Carradine line was intentional BECAUSE he was dead.

Posted by: BWeaves at November 4, 2010 11:38 AM

I'm going up to the top of hill now to wait for my death. My body will eventually roll down into the river where people will come to wash their clothing.

We have the Pajiba Tactical Honorary Trebuchet ready for this sort of thing. Just put down on the piece of paper if you'd like your corpse to be fired at a Kardashian, the cast of Jersey Shore or a Fox executive.

Posted by: twig at November 4, 2010 11:39 AM

What? Ha! Yeah, it totally was intentional. HA HA HA!

SHUT THE FUCK UP I'M NOT DRUNK YOU ASSHOLES.

[passes out]

Posted by: TK at November 4, 2010 11:40 AM

His big mistake is casting Snooki. She'll be box office poison.

Posted by: Slash at November 4, 2010 11:40 AM

OMG, I'm watching now and the trailer uses a Zeppelin song ... I'm not sure how I feel about that.

Looks like The Matrix set in an all-girl's (all NAUGHTY girls) school. I guess this will be the next movie to launch a million nerd boners.

Posted by: Slash at November 4, 2010 11:46 AM

Now that I've seen the entire trailer, I gotta say, that looks craptacular.

Posted by: Slash at November 4, 2010 11:47 AM

Who the hell cares about this "plot"?

If they had done the entire trailer with no sound, made it shorter, and just had it play matched up to "When The Levee Breaks" that would have been amazing.

When the Led Zeppelin started, I got real excited. Then they had to do that annoying movie trailer thing where they only use a part of a great song.

I should make movie trailers.

Posted by: Sam at November 4, 2010 11:49 AM

I love Emily Browning and I miss Jena Malone (She seemed everywhere once, what happened? DAMN YOU ELLEN PAGE!)

Plus, those will make some kick-ass Halloween costumes!

Posted by: Annie_Reckson at November 4, 2010 11:52 AM

Hellz yes! It's got a dragon in it. A fire breathing dragon. Ya gotta love that.

Posted by: logan at November 4, 2010 12:28 PM

What piss-poor CGI. Also, the 'little girl trapped in hell-hole goes on escapist fantasy quest' worked for me when it was called 'Pan's Labyrinth.'

Posted by: ruru at November 4, 2010 12:52 PM

Ok, so she finds herself in "The Lennox House for the Mentally Insane".
As opposed to.... the physically insane?

Posted by: Odnon. at November 4, 2010 12:55 PM

I am going to watch the fuck out of this movie.

Posted by: teacupnosaucer at November 4, 2010 1:35 PM

Not sure if anyone outside of Seattle would catch it, but I love the Brad reference in the title.

(hooray! --TK)

Posted by: summerteeth at November 4, 2010 1:51 PM

Needs more action.

Posted by: JapJay at November 4, 2010 2:03 PM

You did NOT just quote Brad, did you? Yes. Yes you did. Yeah, I'll go watch this.

TK, you so crazy (drunk)!

Posted by: Mr. Yuck at November 4, 2010 2:30 PM

HOW are you DRUNK?! Don't you have, like, A JOB?! Where they frown on that sort of thing?! I mean, my job is pretty cool with it, actually, but most aren't.

I want to know how you're drunk in the daytime.

Posted by: Anna von Beav at November 4, 2010 2:54 PM

TK's always drunk. His "blood" is really 80% Zima, 10% Wild Turkey, 10% Bush Light Draft.

Posted by: Mr. Yuck at November 4, 2010 3:36 PM

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMM!

Just for him, I'm on. On him. I mean, on the movie. Dammit.

Also good cast of badass-looking chicks, even if it all looks totally ridiculous. But. HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMM!

But damn you, there's no Hamm in the trailer. Fucking tease.

Posted by: figgy at November 4, 2010 6:42 PM

gotta say, I'm a fan of Snyder, his stories usually suck but his movies are gorgeous.

Posted by: Ben at November 4, 2010 9:57 PM

I was okay for the first trailer of the movie just for the pretty factor, but this one...

It's just not epic enough to be using one of my favorite Led Zeppelin songs ever. The clash of quality there totally turned me off.

Posted by: Shibuyama at November 5, 2010 7:56 AM

When I was 14 I didn't have anything NEAR this tasteless to call my favorite movie. Lucky little fuckers. It's like Snyder smoked some really, really strong shit and fapped all over the screen. "Hot chicks with katanas and dragons and robot samurais with machine guns and *incomprehensible slobbering* *nerdgasm*"

I'll probably make it to the theater for this one.

Posted by: HappyGobo at November 5, 2010 1:00 PM

ill have some of whatever Snyder is smoking. jesus fucking christ, the man is surely insane.

Posted by: Taylor Kozakar at November 5, 2010 8:52 PM

I thought the first part was rather captivating. Then the Zeppelin stopped....

Posted by: Edwina the Magnificent at November 6, 2010 3:37 PM

Anyone else happy that people are actually making blockbuster versions of elementary school day dreams?

I totally am. Bring on the dragon-slaying giant robo-samurai!

Posted by: Ken Hart at November 6, 2010 4:43 PM

I'm gonna watch this movie so hard.

Posted by: L-Za at November 6, 2010 6:32 PM