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Paul Red Band: Profanity Makes Everything Better Except ...

By Dustin Rowles | Posted Under Trailers | Comments (22)

Paul-Movie-Trailer.jpg

I can’t finish that headline. After several minutes of furious brainstorming, I’m unable think of anything that isn’t better without profanity. Children’s birthday parties, church, taxes, sex, death? All better with profanity. Cupcakes, maybe — profanity doesn’t make any qualitative difference, I suppose, but even then, a cupcake would probably be more fun to eat if it were accompanied by profanity. Can anyone name one thing that is not improved by swear words?

The Paul trailer is no exception. The PG trailers already looked fun, but the Red Band trailer kicks it up a level. Sure, it’s an assortment of the usual dick-and-ball jokes, but now they’re being applied to an alien. An alien voiced by Seth Rogen.

Also, Jason Bateman is in this. You could probably say the same thing about profanity and Jason Bateman: Everything’s better with him involved.










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Comments

Can anyone name one thing that is not improved by swear words?

Swearing by the doctor, who is performing an operation on you. No thanks!

Posted by: Cindy at February 25, 2011 11:24 AM

As far as this trailer is concerned, heck yeah, swear words make everything better. And you're right, Jason Bateman even made Teen Wolf Too almost watchable.

But does censored profanity count as including "profanity"? Because I often find censored @#$% to be much funnier than uncensored @#$%.* Like the pilot of Arrested Development. To me, the TV-safe version is better because half of GOB's dialogue can't be heard. Or, the "[Blank] in a Box" Andy Samberg/Justin Timberlake music video; I always thought it was "C**k" not "D**k", and the former is hella more laugh-out-loudable than the latter.

* At least when accompanied by a sound effect, or the utter absence of sound.

Posted by: RobP at February 25, 2011 11:35 AM

Sympathy cards

Sexual harassment

Two and a Half Men

Technical documentation

Spam

Diaper rash

Just a few ideas off the top of my head. As you see, I live in an unpleasant world.

Posted by: Wednesday at February 25, 2011 11:35 AM

You guys don't have this yet? woot for being in the UK for once. But again this trailer spoils a hell of alot of the movie like most other trailers it seems.

As for the movie itself. No way as good as shaun of the dead or hot fuzz but still worth a watch at least.

Posted by: Yastobaal at February 25, 2011 11:49 AM

The mechanic working on your car.

I once hired a plumber to fix a leaky bathtub faucet. He looked like Popeye and, appropriately, cursed like a sailor. We could hear him all the way in the living room, banging at the pipes and swearing up a storm. It was nothing creative, just a whole lot of "God-damn"s and "son of a bitch"es, but the comic intensity of it made it all we could do to keep from busting a gut laughing.

He fixed the leak and I wrote his check happily. He had made my day.

Posted by: , at February 25, 2011 11:53 AM

Any bit in this cinematical pile of dung has already been done by Roger in American Dad.

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at February 25, 2011 11:57 AM

Sympathy cards-"Sorry about your grandpa, but he was a badass motherfucker!!!"

Sexual Harassment-Listen you craptacular lugfucker. You tell me one more time how nice my jugs look in this sweater, and you'll be carrying your undoubtably tiny bait and tackle in a tuna can around your neck for the rest of your short and unhappy fucking life.

Technical Documentation "Put that fucking duct between that cocksucking sprinkler pipe and the shit eating light fixture."

Spam "Hello, I fucking am Nigerian official cocksucker. Could you please put 15 thousand fucking dollars in your son of a bitching bank account?"

Diaper rash-fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck!!

I can't help you with Two and a Half Men.

Posted by: Mrcreosote at February 25, 2011 12:01 PM

Wednesday, I think Technical documentation would be waaaaay better with some f-bombs thrown in there.

Posted by: Paultera at February 25, 2011 12:09 PM

Cupcakes + "Fuck" = Fuckakes

Posted by: superasente at February 25, 2011 12:41 PM

As for the movie itself. No way as good as shaun of the dead or hot fuzz but still worth a watch at least.

Well enough. I'll put it on the rental or NetFlix list.

And, Slim, some of us have the good taste of not watching McFarlane's crrrap. If Family Guy is at best a turd, American Dad is the runny, mushy end of the bowel movement.

Posted by: idiosynchronic at February 25, 2011 12:44 PM

I prefer Cupfucks, but who doesn't?

Posted by: logar at February 25, 2011 12:46 PM

".. the runny, mushy end of the bowel movement."


Ewww

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at February 25, 2011 12:59 PM

I will be requiring both Cupfucks and Fuckcakes by the end of the day. Somebody please get on that.

Posted by: Beckells at February 25, 2011 1:22 PM

Can anyone name one thing that is not improved by swear words?

Charlie Sheen. The way he uses curse words actually makes him MORE of a tool.

Posted by: Edith at February 25, 2011 1:32 PM

I would LOVE it if I could toss some swear words into my technical documentation.
"Take the fucking drill and stab it into that bastard's skull and go apeshit."

Posted by: (Not so) Blonde Savant at February 25, 2011 1:55 PM

Whoa!
Lance, i mean... Landry!!!!

Posted by: Scott at February 25, 2011 2:28 PM

I think what you meant to say, or add at least, was that Sigourney Weaver is in this, and she makes everything better.

Posted by: headmonkeys at February 25, 2011 2:57 PM

Since waaay before 'Arrested Development', and even up to now, Jason Bateman has been one of the most 'overlooked', exceptionally talented actors with a killer sense of humor and deadpan looks that rank up there with the likes of Bill Murray.

Between the two sitcoms 'Silver Spoon', when he was but a wee lad but already showing promise, and 'The Hogan Family', which I watched simply because of his character & how he could make me laugh just as hard as I ever did at Michael J. Fox on his show, Bateman came back about a year or so too late, when said Mr. Fox was by then dominating the 'sarcastic white teenage son' role while going from 'Family Ties' to megasuccess in movies. I'm close to the same age as Bateman, and I clearly remember him being virtually ignored because of Fox's overwhelming presence in TV and celebrity magazines - he was BIG for a brief time there, people.

And sadly, there were a lot of years we didn't hardly see him until 'Arrested Development'.

I love all the talent involved in this movie, except for Seth Rogen, who I associate with most of the crap comedy today, like 'Superbad', 'Pineapple Express' and other shit that leaves me wondering where to laugh at - but I thought the dude's voice coming out of that alien was funny, and just those two slaps Bateman hands out made me laugh- and if I can let out one audible laugh when watching some new so-called "hilarious new comedy movie" trailer, then I'm keeping high hopes for it.

And of course the profanity certainly doesn't hurt.

Posted by: gman at February 25, 2011 8:07 PM

My DC tags expired yesterday, and I forgot to post the new ones last night because Verizon screwed up my order to add phone service to my Fios, and I had to fix it myself in the rain...

But of course the DC meter maids gave me a $100 ticket the second my tags expired today and I shouted at the top of my voice for all to hear:

"DIE YOU MOTHER F*CK!NG C*NT OFFICER ABNER!!!" (repeat ten times, pound fender and dent it a little)...

Then I felt a little bit better, but I swear if I saw a meter maid at that moment I would have gleefully, while laughing, chewed the skin from their face and spit it back at them...

(hmm, perhaps I need medication)...

Posted by: TrickyHD at February 26, 2011 12:38 AM

Mrcreosote cracks my ass up.

Posted by: , at February 26, 2011 2:57 AM

Swearing definitely helps technical documentation - just look at the Linux source code for examples

cd /usr/src/linux
grep -ir "" *

Potty mouthed open source developers!!

Posted by: Toby at February 26, 2011 6:43 AM

Whoops, that should be

cd /usr/src/linux
grep -ir "VERY_BAD_WORD" *

Posted by: Toby at February 26, 2011 6:44 AM