web counter
 

New Final Destination 5 Trailer: Screws Fall Out All The Time, The World Is An Imperfect Place

By TK | Posted Under Trailers | Comments (11)

the-final-destination-crushed.jpg

Of course I’m going to see the next Final Destination movie. I’ve seen all of them to date, and while the first two are by far the most entertaining, there’s something to take away from each of them. Assuming, of course, that you enjoy people get cleverly and creatively killed with a sense of tongue-in-cheek glee. If you don’t, well, I simply don’t think we can hang, and I will spend my remaining days hoping that you’re the one who gets chewed up by a wood chipper by accident.

Oh, fuck. I do that anyway, don’t I.

Of course, the truth is that all four of the movies so far are terrible. They’re like a low-rent Breakfast Club remake with gruesome deaths and random bullshitting about fate. A random group of strangers is brought together, someone sees the future, and they avoid death, and then they all die. This one features Tony Todd in a larger role, which I’m down with. And a suspension bridge, and a vignette which shows why I’m never fucking getting Lasic surgery.

So watch it, and enjoy it.









Each Time You Like, Share, Tweet or Stumble a Pajiba Post, An Angel Does the Paul Rudd Dance

← The Ledge Review | For God's Sake, Just Jump Already | Amigo Trailer: John Sayles Directing Chris Cooper And Garret Dillahunt? Yes Please. →









Comments

Fuck yes. I love these movies. Judge me all you like.

Posted by: beckster at July 11, 2011 12:09 AM

Great title... I love that quote. And the way you tie it in by referencing The Breakfast Club in the actual piece? Brilliant, just brilliant.

Posted by: Corntree at July 11, 2011 2:52 AM

Wow. The trailer didn't give away much, except for the setups of all the damn kills. With you on the naynay to the Lasik surgery. Thinking about my eyes getting messed with gives me the heebie jeebies. Also disturbing? The lack of rebar, and the odd spacing of what's there in the header pic. Small wonder the b****e collapses.

Posted by: Groundloop at July 11, 2011 8:12 AM

If Mrs. , sees this, it will take two hours longer to get to the beaches in Delaware from now on. Hell, we'll have to find a bridgeless route to her mom's house. Mrs. , has a bit of a bridge phobia.

You've got to perversely admire people who can keep making movies with "Final" in the title when, apparently, they never are and never will be.

Posted by: , at July 11, 2011 9:07 AM

These are the films that make me climb on my soap box and rant about how gore for gore's sake is not entertainment. How even some of the most disgusting "torture porn" films churned out by the Hollywood machine at least had to have some plot justification beyond "these kids are gonna die." How a film that pretends it's some heady spin on the nature of fate but just uses that as an excuse--not even a good excuse--to kill people one by one without any suspense or morality is just disgusting. These films have all the quality and moral fiber of a socially inept horror fanatic tying models up to trees and whipping them repeatedly as entertainment without any of the excuses related to upbringing and possible mental health issues.

But that's me. If you like it for the kills and can't see a line of difference between this series and other horror films, more power to you.

Posted by: Robert at July 11, 2011 9:48 AM

a little miles fisher in there? nice.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G29d6RDSK1c

Posted by: eldopa at July 11, 2011 10:33 AM

Looks better than the mediocre last 2. Interesting to see the "murder someone else to live" component, wonder how long before that gets abandoned as a plot thread.

Posted by: TylerDFC at July 11, 2011 10:56 AM

YES.

Posted by: gp at July 11, 2011 12:19 PM

Thanks, trailer! Now I know how everyone dies. I just saved $15.

Posted by: elizalegs at July 11, 2011 1:45 PM

I enjoyed Final Destination 3. I didn't see Final Destination 4...but that won't stop me from seeing 5. Heck, I saw Fast Five without seeing Fast & Furious 3 or 4 and I didn't miss a beat. Probably bc there aren't many beats to begin with. Laser eye surgery ar;era;lej;fkaek;fj;dsjfaksjdfkakd;la; what a horrible way to die.

Posted by: Littlejon2001 at July 11, 2011 3:09 PM

Fuck no on the lasik. EVER. Also, that bridge was recently upgraded at great expense, but at least they did a good job of making it look like it collapsed. And that creepy mortician guy from the earlier movies may be the most welcome sight in the whole series - he can really bring the creepy.

Maybe one day I'll download rent it really cheap and surprise ladyhelmet with it, just to see her reaction...

Posted by: lordhelmet at July 11, 2011 6:21 PM