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January 26, 2009 |

By Dustin Rowles | Trailers | January 26, 2009 |

I don’t know anything about Mutant Chronicles, probably because I don’t spend a lot of time in my mother’s basement role-playing with droolers and shut-ins or have shelves full of miniature figures that I’ll someday hock to pay for my nasal-spray addiction. (Help me out here, Twig). The movie is based on a “pen-and-paper” role playing game, which I suspect it even geekier than the kind of role-playing games that actually get you out of the house (there’s also a spin-off card game — hot!). The movie, like the game, takes place in the distant future — in this case, 2077, where the corporate conglomerates are fighting over rapidly depleting natural resources. There’s a bomb, a mutant army, and Thomas Jane, who saves the world. Or something.

In addition to Jane, the movie — which will premiere in March on video-on demand before being given a token theatrical release in April — stars John Malkovich, Ron Perlman, and Devon Aoki. But don’t go getting your hopes up on account of the cast, please. Take a look at the nonsensical trailer:

Except Stander / Dustin Rowles

Trailers | January 26, 2009 |

Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here or follow him on Twitter.

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