I Thought I Had Food Poisoning. Turns Out, It Was Just The Trailer For Scary Movie 5
I had just finished dinner when an unease settled upon my entire being. My stomach, though full, still felt empty and forlorn. I was confused. I was anxious. Then my mouth began to water and I knew what was coming. Needless to say, my stomach was soon as empty as your life and aspirations will become once you watch the trailer for Scary Movie 5.
Simon Rex, Ashley Tisdale, Heather Locklear, Katt Williams, Sarah Hyland, Charlie Sheen and Lindsay Lohan are ready to kill your will to live. Feel free to count the number of movie references, as that is how many more days you have to live. Probably. I'm not sure. I'm just going over here to weep.
Pajiba Love Express
Here's some Daveed Diggs for you. On Daveed Diggs' digs, actually. That man does things with clothes that should not make sense, but are absolutely perfect. (Go Fug Yourself)
Woody Allen has "so moved on" from his daughter's accusations and says he never even thinks about it. He equates her words about him to a bad review he won't read and comments on how wacky it is that Mia Farrow is his mother-in-law. He is the worst. (Celebitchy)
Not The Worst but still very gross: Leonardo DiCaprio and his
Here are 5 under-the-radar shows. I had never even heard of the first two. (Uproxx)