Having only just released the stinker, My Life in Ruins, which debuted at number 9 at the box-office over the weekend, Nia Vardalos is apparently hellbent on ruining all of her Big Fat Greek Wedding credibility (ha!) at in quick succession. Less than a month from now, she’s also set to release I Hate Valentine’s Day. And while this romantic comedy has no relationship with Greece, it does reteam her with Greek Wedding’s John Corbett, as well as My Life In Ruins’ Rachel Dratch.
Written, directed, and starring Vardalos, the romantic comedy gimmick here is: She doesnt’ believe in relationships, so she sets a five-date limit with love interests. But oh noes! What if she falls in love with him? Will she have to swallow her pride and break the five-date limit? Whatever will happen?
Man, I find John Corbett to be adorable, charming, and incredibly likable, but he keeps ending up in dreck like this. Does anyone remember the F/X show 'Lucky' that he starred in? That shit needs to be on DVD NOW.
Posted by: Mimi at June 9, 2009 7:35 PM
Seems as if this Vardalos woman is pulling a Woody Allen, in which she writes herself into starring roles with cock that's WAAAAAAAAAY above her ugly league.
Posted by: BarbadoSlim at June 9, 2009 7:42 PM
That's PRECISELY what I was thinking.
Posted by: Tanner at June 9, 2009 7:48 PM
Am I the only person around here who absolutely loathes Rachel Dratch?
Alright, this is sexist. Making a piece of tripe for next to nothing, and demand that women come in droves to see it, and change part of their lives because of the movie. It's sexist, because it says that women need to have their lives dictated by movies.
At least shitty movies made for guys don't ask them to change their lives.
John Corbett was great in Dinner Rush. Really underrated film that winds up on IFC a lot.
Posted by: JakesAlterEgo at June 9, 2009 8:38 PM
she sets a five-date limit with love interests.
---
Do real women in real life really do stupid gimmicky shit like this?
I hope not. I want to continue to like women.
But feel free to make it a mini-diversion: The stupidest rule you ever set for yourself.
Posted by: , (the commenter formerly known as bucdaddy) at June 9, 2009 8:39 PM
Seems as if this Vardalos woman is pulling a Woody Allen, in which she writes herself into starring roles with cock that's WAAAAAAAAAY above her ugly league.
Whatever, it's about time mediocre chicks got hot lovin' on camera.
Vardalos is kinda freaking me out. She looks...off. I don't know if it's because it looks like her face has been sucked to a skeleton with little hanging things, or that the face no longer matches the body.
Is it just me or was she much more attractive in MBFGW?
As for the "romantic comedy" I've never really gotten into them. Aside from Garden State the only other one I can watch on a semi-regular basis is Forgetting Sarah Marshall. I blame my mother and sister for this, raising me on Dirty Dancing, Ghost, You've Got Mail, Sleepless in Seattle, etc. That, and the fact that as a friend once told me all women are "liars, cheaters and thieves," and whereas women don't admit it guys do. So far this has proven true in every one of my relationships.
Whatever, it's about time mediocre chicks got hot lovin' on camera.
As for that, there are plenty of mediocre chicks who get hot lovin' on camera...look at Anne Heche in 6 Days 7 Nights, Anne Reid in The Mother, or Helen Mirren in Shadowboxer. I could continue.
As for this movie...it will probably do well...against my wishes. Although it did make me chuckle at the end it reminds me too much of a female version of Hitch or something. That last line of the trailer though, "what do guys like besides pizza and morning sex?" was fantastic.
The blonde-ish hair is awful. I miss the gigantic dark Greek curls. Corbett and Vardalos are on comparable levels of attractiveness to me. She has the nose, he has no lips, they're both charming people.
It's not like Vardalos with John Hamm or Corbett with SJP. That would strain credulity.
Posted by: TryScience at June 9, 2009 9:37 PM
Much as I can't stand Woody Allen, a word for Vardalos: You, dear, are no Woody Allen. Please, just stop.
Posted by: lordhelmet at June 9, 2009 9:40 PM
She reminds me of SJP when she started misinterpreting "full of character, charming, and smart" to mean "pretty". You are not pretty Vardalos, you could be better. Please don't let Hollywood take you and turn you into another useless celebutard.
Posted by: Phat girl at June 9, 2009 10:13 PM
It was so obvious to me that she wrote every line that she said in that trailer. It just reeeeks of someone soo excited to give themselves "funny" or "clever" lines. Oh, and the gay stereotypes? Suuper refreshing.
Posted by: Erin S at June 9, 2009 10:35 PM
I have trailer addict. Can't they make their trailers work properly?
Also, hollywood needs to find a new rom com trailer voiceover guy. Seriously. As shit as this movie looks, it wouldn't seem nearly so bad without the awful voiceover.
And another thing - is it just me, or does the content of that trailer have nothing to do with the title of the movie?
I have a few must be's:
1. over the age of 21.
2. have a job and a car.
3. no mental illness.
4. under 5'5"
5. no children.
Well, I don't meet DeistBrawler's standards (no car and I'm now over 5'5"). Guess it's time to go on a bender of some kind. Wait, did you say in a previous thread you were over 6'2"? What do you do, find two short girls and stack them on top of each other?
I maintain that anyone who outright "hates" Valentine's Day is giving it far more credit than it deserves. It's an annoyance at best.
WHAT THE FUCK?!? I just watched all of 10 seconds of the trailer and determined that the main character HAS MY NAME.
NIA VARDALOS, YOU ARE ON MY LIST!
Fuck! I'm gonna have to actually start going by Rusty in real life.
(And Deist I don't think anything's wrong with liking short women, I just find it odd that you state that being a clear foot shorter than you is a requirement. To be fair, I quirk an eyebrow at women under 5'7" who "require" guys be over 6' too. Preferences are all well and good, but I'm never going to completely shut someone out of my dating pool because of height when there are so many more important things to consider. Like being functionally literate.)
God, I'm sure the movie isn't very good, but I get a "Terrible Trailer" alarm going off from this. I mean, gimmicky romcoms like this can hope to be cute at best, and hey, I'm willing to give Nia and John the chance to give me cute-at-best.
Not that I'd ever dream of seeing this in a theater, but the damn thing looks a hell of a lot more promising than My Life in Ruins ever did. There's something very comforting about a formulaic gimmicky romcom, but they of course easily devolve into schlock. ::shrugs:: And yeah - the title has absolutely nothing to do with anything. It reeks of "studio-mandated" and would only remotely make sense if this were coming out in February.
nicole, you're not alone. i loathe ratchel dratch.
...I wanted a guy with...
...Iooks, security, caring.
Someone with their own place.
Someone who said "bless you"
or "gesundheit" when I sneezed.
Someone who liked the same
things as me, but not exactly.
And someone who loves me.
-Tall order.
-Yeah, I scaled it down a little.
What is it now?
Someone who says "gesundheit, "
although I prefer "bless you."
Posted by: gem at June 10, 2009 9:16 AM
This actress really has range!
Nominate her for an Oscar now!
Posted by: barf at June 10, 2009 9:16 AM
there are plenty of mediocre chicks who get hot lovin' on camera... Helen Mirren in Shadowboxer.
What's the deal with dumping a guy after the 5th date? I've never ever got to a 5th date with anyone other than my husband.
Date 1: You either hate him or you like him.
Date 2: The guy you like either gets annoying very fast, or you like him a little more.
Date 3: I only got to date 3 once. I married him 4 years later.
Posted by: BWeaves at June 10, 2009 9:23 AM
has anyone else notice that John Corbett is the voiceover guy in the Applebee commercials?!?!?! It pains me that Aidan-- hot furniture designer who likes fried chicken-- does voice overs over for the a crappy restaurant chain.
Posted by: soto at June 10, 2009 11:30 AM
I like Vardalos OK, and I think she's lovely. Her movies... eh. I'm guessing she'd like to be the next Nora Ephron or whatever. I think she should aim higher. It's too bad there even exists a category such as "chick flick" and even worse that the movies that come out of it are almost universally awful, though I guess it's kinda progress in that they usually insult BOTH men and women.
Posted by: Slash at June 10, 2009 12:28 PM
DeistBrawler, you are 6'4" and only want to date women that are 5'5" or shorter? as a woman who is 6'1", i'd love to know where you live. because you need to be shot in the face.
DeistBrawler, you are 6'4" and only want to date women that are 5'5" or shorter? as a woman who is 6'1", i'd love to know where you live. because you need to be shot in the face.
I'm 5'10". I'll go with you Daisy. I'll drive the getaway car.
Posted by: Rachel at June 10, 2009 1:28 PM
Daisy and Rachel I'm 6'1" and have a shovel in my car...coincidence?
Posted by: Morgagod at June 10, 2009 2:34 PM
Jesus, the tall women are rooting for my downfall.
I actually have a friend who is 6'3", we kind of tried dating once but I couldn't get past the fact that our feet touched when we were laying in bed stretched out. It just felt...weird.
What can I say? I like that when I hold a woman her ear touches my heart.
Deistbrawler: Well, that's about the cutest thing I ever. And you are not alone. I find I get the "how you doin?" from the taller gentlemen more than anyone else. One actually told me he found my height fascinating.
Posted by: Sweetie Dahling at June 10, 2009 5:55 PM
Oh, and P.S. I seem to enjoy men an age bracket above my own, for some reason. As for stupid rules I set- I have a lot of trouble dating bad writers who are proud of their bad writing. I know, I'm a snot, but it gets difficult to think up ambiguous and evasive comments to avoid giving my opinion.
Posted by: Sweetie Dahling at June 10, 2009 6:01 PM
I cannot believe nobody made a porn joke out of out my hot lovin' comment. Pajiba has disappointed me.
My only rules are: absolutely cannot be in a relationship, and can't be older than my dad. I don't make stupid rules.
Then again because of none stupid rules you could end up with a middle-aged divorced man with six children, three cats, two dogs, and a tendency to rape small ethnic boys. He could also hold deep seeded desires to beat women to a pulp, thrash about wildly in his sleep, and snore louder than a dumptruck. All of this because he was abused as a child and therefore became a pathological liar and tells you he loves you even though he will never mean it. On top of that he hordes his money so that he can appear to be rich when he takes you out on wonderful dates and buys you tickets to the opera, when in reality he is just the manager of the local Taco Bell and relies on insurance checks from the tragic "accidental" death of his second wife. Of course, his "rape van" is a fantastic way to get around town as long as you don't find yourself sticking to drying blood or tasting ductape.
There are stupid rules...and yet some of them are there for a reason. So they're not really stupid...as they are simple.
Whatever, it's about time mediocre chicks got hot lovin' on camera.
That was kind of too easy, besides, I think we've beat Sasha Grey to a pulp already. :-)
That's OK, I hear divorced men are grateful in bed, I love dogs, I have noise-cancelling headphones for the snoring, and I wouldn't believe any man who said he loved me anyways.
I will amend my rules, though, to include "no raping small ethnic boys." That's just unfair. Pick on someone your own size!
I think the real question here is: Why does she hate Valentine's Day? Never once in the trailer is the approaching date even mentioned. Who the hell picked the name for this movie?
Posted by: Annie_Reckson at June 14, 2009 11:27 PM
Man, I find John Corbett to be adorable, charming, and incredibly likable, but he keeps ending up in dreck like this. Does anyone remember the F/X show 'Lucky' that he starred in? That shit needs to be on DVD NOW.